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AIBU?

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Original poster

Weird neighbour behaviour what do I do

247 replies

Hoorayforsunshine · 08/04/2021 05:57

Posting for a friend who has shared vids from her security camera.

While they are away from their home (permitted travel), NDN has:

— jumped over the garden fence
—gone to the house to stare inside
—poked around items on the patio
—- spend a couple mins overall in the garden before leaving.

To me it looks like he was looking for a spare key/ way to get in while they were away. Don’t think he realised that they have a security camera which recorded all the above. Apparently he has asked for a key before.

Yes - there is no innocent explanation here.

No - there is an innocent explanation.

What on earth should they do? My suggestion was to have a word on their return so they can gauge his response but my friend said that this guy has always seemed creepy.

OP posts:
notalwaysalondoner · 08/04/2021 12:35

My immediate assumption is they are just very nosy people. But it's hard to say without viewing the video, if they were looking really hard under pots and doormats etc. then I would be very suspicious. If they just wandered around the garden and looked into the windows I would assume they were just really nosy and wouldn't assume anything bad, it wouldn't cross my mind to be honest. I'm quite nosy and often look through people's bathroom cabinets etc. when I'm visiting (I know, I shouldn't) so that's why I would jump to that conclusion.

Charmatt · 08/04/2021 12:36

They should just ask him what he was doing because they saw him on the cctv.

That covers everything - he knows he was seen and he knows they have cctv and he will be seen if he does it again.

lydia2021 · 08/04/2021 12:37

This person is odd, but if hes trying to get attention from his neighbour. I certainly would not be visiting him to ask anything, or getting a dialogue going with me. Call 101 and log it and ask for advice

Namechange1991x · 08/04/2021 12:39

@ChangedName4TheSakeOfIt

I don't understand why everyone is giving him the benefit of the doubt saying he could be looking for a lost pet or that he'd heard a noise inside. He was poking around items on the patio. Did he think his lost kitty was under a plant pot?
Agree. Even if I heard something next door, no way would I go around snooping. Do other people think this is ok??
chaosmaker · 08/04/2021 12:43

I thought you had to have a CCTV sign up if you were using it? In which case he either hasn't seen the sign or doesn't care but I'd be logging it with the police in case they have to follow up in the future. Also requesting a key is very strange. What reason did he give for needing one?

TidyDancer · 08/04/2021 12:45

This is definitely very creepy. I think the best course of action regarding this is to do as previous posters have said, casually ask what he was doing in the garden as he was caught on camera and wait for the explanation. It will no doubt be a lie, but he will then know he's been seen and will be seen again if he attempts it on another occasion.

ThePlantsitter · 08/04/2021 12:46

It's obviously suspicious behaviour whatever the actual cause. I just think you've got 2 choices as to how you interpret it: evil intent or some situation that's arisen. They should talk to the neighbours either way. I just don't see the point in assuming it's bad behaviour unless they can actually do something about it. They're just getting themselves panicked with nowhere to put the panic! Much better to assume it's benign and ask when you get home.

Felifox · 08/04/2021 13:02

If they had a genuine reason for going into the garden they would have put a note through the door saying Tiddles had gone missing and they'd looked in your garden. I'd definitely ask for advice from 101 and keep a copy of the recording.

Gothichouse40 · 08/04/2021 13:08

Im with dobido, say nothing, don't tell them you have a camera and see what happens in the future. Keep a diary and log any further incidents in writing. All very strange.

Gothichouse40 · 08/04/2021 13:13

Just as a thought if your friend is a woman on her own, don't confront him. You have no idea who this guy is or his background.

crosspelican · 08/04/2021 13:18

Doesn't it depend entirely on their relationship and their own surroundings?

Valid reasons I might have for climbing into my neighbour's garden while they were away and peering in the window:

I hadn't seen them for a few days and had reason to believe they were still at home but weren't answering the door. Is everything okay (they are elderly and, well, there's a pandemic)? (Would prob text another neighbour first before bothering to put my shoes on to go in the garden tho).

KNEW they were away, thought I had seen movement or heard something.

KNEW they were away, was retrieving something my kids had thrown in and had a nosy peep in the window to see what their sofa was like.

PandemicAtTheDisco · 08/04/2021 13:20

The police advised me to get a camera and record evidence my neighbour was getting in my garden. They said they needed that before it could be taken further.

NVision · 08/04/2021 13:21

Knicker sniffer/thief potentially?

saffire · 08/04/2021 13:22

@chaosmaker

I thought you had to have a CCTV sign up if you were using it? In which case he either hasn't seen the sign or doesn't care but I'd be logging it with the police in case they have to follow up in the future. Also requesting a key is very strange. What reason did he give for needing one?
Not if it's filming their own private property. Any one filmed there has no rights over their image. Someone would only have rights if it's a camera filming private and public property ie. the street and captures cars & passers by.
randomlyLostInWales · 08/04/2021 13:30

I'd be planting firethorn or holly along the fence.

www.best4hedging.co.uk/blog/stay-safe-with-spikey-security-top-5-intruder-proof-hedges/

I'd also make sure I had blinds that could close when I wasn't in.

I've no idea if there's an innocent explination - but it's not behavior I'd particurly want though I'd tolerate it from current neigbours as we do know them and they are sensible and nice and would have a good reason for their behavior we've also been here longer.

If your friend is already getting wierd vibes and has someone they don't know want a key - I'd be very suspicious.

How much lucky you'd get with the police - I think would depend on your area and who you speak to.

As for letting them know there is CCTV there - I'm not sure. You'd hope it would discourage such behavior but at same time might just make him sneakier if he knows.

1forAll74 · 08/04/2021 13:37

Not being ageist here, is the person on the camera young or older.as in maybe younger,as he can jump over the fence easily, and snoop about.and maybe has thieving tendencies.,well you did say he seems creepy..

I would just keep a watch out on the cameras firstly, and ask any other neighbour if they have had the same kind of issues.

We have had issues in my village here recently, where snoopers have been seen around the village. and then three break ins later. with expensive tools stolen from an outside building, that was locked, with the locks then broken.

FlyingBurrito · 08/04/2021 13:37

I'd poured tar over the dickhead. Seriously...that sounds dodgy as hell! Peeping Toms go on to rape

So @FortunesFave you'd literally go to the effort of sourcing some tar and somehow transporting to your neighbour?

Would you knock at the door with your bucket of tar and wait for him to answer or watch out of the window and ambush him one day as he went out?

In the realm of stupid suggestions this has got to be near the top. Have you mistaken MN home of adult discussion with facebook home of idiots with pitchforks?

CheesyWeez · 08/04/2021 13:40

I have done this, poking around in neighbours garden when I knew they were away. I was looking for their guineau pigs - I could see from an upstairs window that they had escaped so I went to try and catch them and put them back in their pen.

I agree that in your friend's case it seems more creepy.

AngryBananaSund · 08/04/2021 14:13

It’s never happened yet, but if we started to get regular visitors (human or otherwise) I’d get one of these

www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0153BJ7NQ/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_N5Q899MC5Y9GVA1MKFCS?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

A motion activated water spray, if something moves it gets wet

ChangedName4TheSakeOfIt · 08/04/2021 14:15

@chaosmaker

I thought you had to have a CCTV sign up if you were using it? In which case he either hasn't seen the sign or doesn't care but I'd be logging it with the police in case they have to follow up in the future. Also requesting a key is very strange. What reason did he give for needing one?
Doesn't have to be big. The official one that came with my CCTV is about 3 inches by 2 inches.
Honeyroar · 08/04/2021 14:24

@ChangedName4TheSakeOfIt

I don't understand why everyone is giving him the benefit of the doubt saying he could be looking for a lost pet or that he'd heard a noise inside. He was poking around items on the patio. Did he think his lost kitty was under a plant pot?
Nobody thinks he’s looking for his pet, but that’s what he’d say! He hasn’t committed enough of a crime for the police to be interested. Telling him you know, whatever his excuse, might put him off snooping next time. Easier all round and achieves a result..
ChangedName4TheSakeOfIt · 08/04/2021 14:28

@Honeyroar certain posters on here are saying both. Some saying that he would use the (fake) excuse and other saying that it could be a genuine reason he was there. It's those posters who are absolutely kidding themselves.

I'd like to give most people the benefit of the doubt but the OP has seen the footage personally and the man was poking around items on the patio and certainly believes that he was looking for a key.

viccytwiffy · 09/04/2021 17:21

next time you go out, leave the curtains open so he can see inside and you could place a fake policemans hi vis jacket over one of the chairs or hanging up... so he gets a shock and STAYS WELL AWAY!!

Buffs · 09/04/2021 17:34

My immediate response was that he might be a friendly neighbour keeping an eye on the place. I do this to my neighbour’s house when she’s away and I have a different neighbour who does to mine - unasked, but she gives me an update later. I suppose it depends entirely on what sort of person he is and what their relationship is like.

Alis25 · 09/04/2021 17:45

Sounds dodgy. I’d ask the police for advice. He may already be known to them.