Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Weird neighbour behaviour what do I do

247 replies

Hoorayforsunshine · 08/04/2021 05:57

Posting for a friend who has shared vids from her security camera.

While they are away from their home (permitted travel), NDN has:

— jumped over the garden fence
—gone to the house to stare inside
—poked around items on the patio
—- spend a couple mins overall in the garden before leaving.

To me it looks like he was looking for a spare key/ way to get in while they were away. Don’t think he realised that they have a security camera which recorded all the above. Apparently he has asked for a key before.

Yes - there is no innocent explanation here.

No - there is an innocent explanation.

What on earth should they do? My suggestion was to have a word on their return so they can gauge his response but my friend said that this guy has always seemed creepy.

OP posts:
starfishmummy · 08/04/2021 11:08

@Shinesun14

Don't tell the neighbour there's a camera. He might disarm (if that's the right word) it and break in.
Definitely agree with this.
WorraLiberty · 08/04/2021 11:10

Then they'll get video footage to their phone of him jumping over the fence and disarming the camera.

OldEvilOwl · 08/04/2021 11:12

Why did he ask for a key in the first place? Very strange. I would tell him he was seen (not mention cameras) and ask him what he was doing

SchadenfreudePersonified · 08/04/2021 11:12

@DasPepe

Leave a key ( which does not fit the lock) somewhere where he could find it. Make sure you record what he does
That's a good idea!
MrsClatterbuck · 08/04/2021 11:21

I think that he asked for a key in the first place is worrying though. I mean who asks new neighbours for a key to their house?

On that alone I would contact police just for advice. It puts him under their radar should anything else untoward happen.

PrudenceDictates · 08/04/2021 11:23

No! No “wrong” or dummy keys! That will just end up knackering the door locks when he tries to use it and ends up getting forceful!

PelvicFloorTrauma · 08/04/2021 11:25

Call the police and go down the stalking route rather than the trespass route. Install spikes along the top of the fence. Speak to neighbour. Make it clear that the police have been informed and there is CCTV footage of his activities.

Mia184 · 08/04/2021 11:29

Does he have a cat that may have been missing?

rainbowstardrops · 08/04/2021 11:30

I think we need a bit more background to determine how creepy/weird this is.
How old is he? Does he have a wife? Does he have a cat that might have been missing? Do you normally get on ok with him?
It might be creepy but it might be innocent too

IdblowJonSnow · 08/04/2021 11:30

I'd call the police to have this logged, even if they won't do anything. And I'd get the footage backed up too.

I think I'd let them know that I knew what he'd been up to.

Can someone stay when she goes away?

sueelleker · 08/04/2021 11:36

What was his original excuse for asking for a key?

Billandben444 · 08/04/2021 11:41

If you confront him his excuse will be that he saw someone/a three-legged unicorn in the garden and was worried about your friend's security. Say nothing but keep checking ctv - if he's dodgy he'll give himself away. Are there any safer neighbourhood teams there cos it might be worth a chat with them

raincamepouringdown · 08/04/2021 11:44

"We have you on our security camera climbing into our yard, peering into our house and what appears to be you searching for a hidden key in our garden while we were away. We are saving the footage. If you EVER enter our property again while we are away, we will be contact the police with all the footage."

raincamepouringdown · 08/04/2021 11:45

Oh, and log it with the police anyway if they mouth off to you when you confront them And tell them you are doing so.

longtompot · 08/04/2021 12:00

@Goblin74

Did the neighbour know your friends were gone?

The only explanation I can think of is that he didn't know they were gone, realised he hadnt seen lights on/ them coming and going and went to check in on them to make sure things were alright?

Although the fact he asked for a key in the past is a bit strange ...

That doesn't explain about the rooting around the garden bit.

I think it is very odd. I wouldn't let onto him that he's been seen, just keep an eye on the camera and see if he does it again. You could then give a quick call tone non urgent police number for some advice.

Did he say why he wanted a key to the house before? I've never asked for a key to a neighbours house and would find it odd if they asked for one to mine. Different if it's offered for reasons others have given (dd locked out etc)

MargaretThursday · 08/04/2021 12:02

How many people actually keep a key in their back garden nowadays?
I don't know anyone-everyone I know leaves one with a friend. In fact we can't get into our back garden without a key so it would be a fat lot of good. I wouldn't be climbing over the fence!

Unless your neighbours said to him when he asked for a key "don't worry we leave a spare one in the back garden", I wouldn't have thought someone who was up to no good would bother looking for one.

Icecreamsoda99 · 08/04/2021 12:07

Why did he ask for a key previously? Did they tell him they would be away? If so maybe he is taking neighborhood watch to the extreme and checking the property, still weird and totally uncalled for but maybe not sinister.

Honeyroar · 08/04/2021 12:08

@Billandben444

If you confront him his excuse will be that he saw someone/a three-legged unicorn in the garden and was worried about your friend's security. Say nothing but keep checking ctv - if he's dodgy he'll give himself away. Are there any safer neighbourhood teams there cos it might be worth a chat with them
Of course he will, but he’ll know you’re aware and able to see him, so probably won’t do it again.
WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants · 08/04/2021 12:12

@Whythesadface

It depends on if he knew they were away or not. I have looked in neighbours windows, as they were old and ill. The door was open, so I called inside, they had been on the floor for 3 hours.
That was kind of you. A neighbour did the same with my uncle as he hadn't opened the front curtains that morning. She saved his life by ringing us & an ambulance

But I suspect, you didn't scale the back fence & poke around on the patio. It's a bit different!

@Hoorayforsunshine. I would ring the non emergency police number & around here they'd come for a chat if I wanted them to. I suspect that wouldn't happen everywhere, I would NOT go around to the neighbours or let him know I had a camera.

My brother is 6'5" and built like a brick outhouse, if he lived near I'd get him to come & stay next time I went away.

WorraLiberty · 08/04/2021 12:17

@Billandben444

If you confront him his excuse will be that he saw someone/a three-legged unicorn in the garden and was worried about your friend's security. Say nothing but keep checking ctv - if he's dodgy he'll give himself away. Are there any safer neighbourhood teams there cos it might be worth a chat with them
Much better to show him the phone footage because excuses or not, he'll know he's been busted and therefore watched now.
ThePlantsitter · 08/04/2021 12:17

Is the house attached? It could be that a smoke alarm has run out of battery and is driving them mad. Or their burglar alarm is chirping or something.

If he's always seemed creepy I guess it isn't innocent but there's not much point worrying unless they can do something (presumably they're not back yet).

ChangedName4TheSakeOfIt · 08/04/2021 12:21

If this were me I would ask the police for advice on what to do. It's possible he's known to them and you might have to take further precautions living next door to a known burglar.

I would NOT let him know about the CCTV. If his intentions are bad, it may not take much to disable a camera without being seen or simply making sure he is disguised.

I like the idea of hiding a useless key and keeping a close eye on the CCTV in future.

Namechange1991x · 08/04/2021 12:25

That's terrifying.

Newnamefor2021 · 08/04/2021 12:26

Maybe say you noticed some items had moved and did they notice anyone? I once went around my neighbours who were away and looked in, while they were away. It was after we had a burglary, where a lot of high value items were stolen, it's was devastating. I knew the neighbours were away, but didn't have contact details etc. So I went to check as I knew I would be able to find someone who did know then if there was a problem but as it was it was safe.

We are just two houses built down a private driveway, and they were closer to the road than us.

I obviously told them though as soon as they got home and they thanked me for looking out.

I felt really cheeky going around and looking in, but I would have wanted someone to check if I had been broken into so my house wasn't left exposed all that time.

ChangedName4TheSakeOfIt · 08/04/2021 12:29

I don't understand why everyone is giving him the benefit of the doubt saying he could be looking for a lost pet or that he'd heard a noise inside. He was poking around items on the patio. Did he think his lost kitty was under a plant pot?