Mother in law is a copycat.

[Loliie]

Me and my partner moved into our first house over a year ago and we chose a lovely grey checked wallpaper for our feature wall in our livingroom. Everyone loved it except my MIL she hated it. But yesterday she sent us photos of her kitchen that has been freshly decorated with our exact wallpaper that she hated so much. Last year I bought myself new glasses and she said “they aren’t nice at all” and then she bought the same ones a few months later in a different colour. I’m unsure if she’s jealous or just a bitch

She's jealous. Do you say anything? I couldn't resist pointing it out.

Take it as a compliment and move on. Life is too short to get hung up on something like this.

"Copycat"?

Are you 8?

I’ve mentioned to my partner that she previously didn’t like it and he says just to take it as a compliment but it’s very annoying. She’s the type of women who can’t compliment other women it’s always back handed or straight up rude.

Feature walls are crap. Use this as an excuse to get rid of it.

She clearly likes your taste but is too stubborn to admit it. Ignore.

@Iremembertheelderlykoreanlady what else would you call it? 🙄

So you call her a 'bitch' because she admires your style and got something the same as you?
Nice.

I’m not calling her a bitch for copying me fs I’m calling her a bitch for making bitchy comments about something

Would be completely different if she straight up said that she liked it but making rude remarks about things then copying them is quite strange

@Loliie

I would probably call it "I don't like my MIL so have picked up on this inconsequential detail in order to complain about her, and get a lot of other MIL hating mumsnetters to agree with me"

She sounds rude AF. I know it’s hard but you have to try to rise above it!

So you call her a 'bitch' because she admires your style and got something the same as you?
Nice. hmm

No, she called hera bitch because she pisses on OP's parade whenever she has something new by saying she doesn't like it, then gets it herself.

She’s odd that’s for sure. I don’t think feature walls are crap as the ‘helpful’ PP said, I think decorating by numbers where every rooms follows the feature wall format is a bit much but there’s no harm in some rooms being done with wallpaper that you only want on one wall. I think it is a compliment and you did well not to think out loud and say oh wow that’s the same as ours and I thought you said you didn’t like it. I’m officially noting that you do now!

I don’t actually hate her. I’d be the same if it was my mother or sister or friend. Why bitch about something and make a big deal out of disliking something multiple times to then go out and buy it yourself? She did the same with our sons name she disliked it and made a point of telling us that but when our nephew was born and it was used as his middle name she absolutely adored it

@Iremembertheelderlykoreanlady do you really think it’s inconsequential that she said bitchy things to OP about her choices? If so I’m sorry that you think it’s ok for people to behave that way to you - like everyone, you deserve better.

FWIW I love my MIL like my own mother. Partly because she’s a lovely person who doesn’t make bitchy comments.

WTF is a "feature wall".

Just move on.

Very strange. Could you change your wallpaper and say she was right it was awful!?

At least yours didn't decide that your honeymoon destinations sounded nice and then book up to go first! It was my first ever abroad holiday and I was so excited, I must admit it took the shine off a bit having to be all excited for them and then look at all their pictures before we went. These type of things wouldn't usually bother me but that did.

I would say 'thats so strange you hated that wallpaper. Grey its on its way out now and we were thinking of changing'
Even if not. Also don't tell her where you buy things.

Weird behaviour. Next time she comments negatively after you buy/update something new, call her out on it.

Laugh and mention how you expect to see her buying the same thing in a few weeks (despite saying she hates it), like with the wallpaper and glasses. Give her a hand by telling her where you bought your item, save her some time

I will definitely do that next time haha.

She sounds like she doesn't have a very strong sense of herself but that is not bitchiness.

I agree that if you liked her you'd find it quirky. Hard though it may be, try to just accept it.

In some areas, I am really clear about my own taste and need no inspiration, in other areas I have NO taste because I've never given the matter any thought. If I were to buy a car tomorrow I suppose I might copy a friend or a neighbour because CARS is not something I've ever developed ''taste'' for. But I'd be surprised if I heard back I'd upset somebody with the lack of original thought.

A friend of mine has the most beautiful pair of earrings and they are an upmarket brand. I feel like I would need to ASK her first if I bought them too. I don't think I would have realised how gorgeous they were if they were just on the site, I only saw their gorgeousness hanging from her ears.

Yeah, definitely say something.

'oh, that's the same wallpaper as we have in our living room. It must have grown on you, as you said you didn't like it!'

I'd comment "ah i thought you didn't like that wallpaper you said?" Shes a jealous bitch, put her on the spot OP she'll stop once she's called out, your DH is pussy footing around her sounds like everyone does hence why she thinks her behaviour is okay.