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Original poster

Is it really bad that 10 year old can’t ride bike?

119 replies

Fattydoggy · 02/04/2021 23:50

My 10 yr old can’t ride a bike. He has had a bike since he was 3. Always peddled backwards and got fed up quickly. He loves his scooter. We always get him a bike that fits but never push him too much to learn because he doesn’t want to. He does have dyspraxia which I believe makes it much harder for him.

Today, we met friends at the park for the first time in ages quite excitedly. They had a lovely time but our friends kids were wanting to swap their bikes with his scooter and so on. He was peddling backwards and could not balance well. He looked really embarrassed he couldn’t ride it properly. Is it too late for us to push it. He doesn’t want to. Was thinking about getting a valance bike for older kids (if they exist)

OP posts:
22Giraffes · 03/04/2021 00:16

My 8 year old cannot ride, it's not through lack of trying on my part. He doesn't seem to have any desire to learn and so any natural willpower and effort is not there. He has a bike the correct size and we have shown him various techniques but it always ends in tears, frustration and giving up very quickly. I have stopped pushing the idea for now as I don't know what else to try.

SnarkyBag · 03/04/2021 00:19

If he has dyspraxia it’s going to be harder so not bad. I would do two things. Get hold of cheap exercise bike so he can just practice pedddling and also take the peddles of his current bike and let him practice gaining balance going down gentle grassy slopes. Once he’s mastered that then you can try putting his peddles back on

KrisAkabusi · 03/04/2021 00:19

Persevere. He'll feel more left out if he's older and all his friends are out cycling.

olderthanyouthink · 03/04/2021 00:20

Not really but go at it in baby steps, pedals off and balance and glide first.

SnarkyBag · 03/04/2021 00:20

Also I think it’s fine to say to him he doesn’t have to swap his scooter with friends when out and about.

GrumpyHoonMain · 03/04/2021 00:21

I have dyspraxia too and you need to consider what happens after he learns the basics? Would he able to manage directions / gears/ road / traffic / other people well enough to be able to ride it on the road or in the park? If not then you’re just setting him up for more embarrassment.

Dizzydaisy33 · 03/04/2021 00:22

My daughter did not learn to ride a bike until a few weeks ago. She is on the cusp of dyspraxia and is being further assessed.
Previously She struggled and couldn't figure out which way to pedal. So she did not want to and stuck with stabilisers. One day a few wee ago, she just gone and off she went, absolutely perfect.
So it may happen yet ,give it time.

Superstardjs · 03/04/2021 00:24

Mine learned at 9 1/2. It was worth persevering to see her delight at mastering it. She outgrew the bike, we won't replace it. But she did it and that mattered enormously to her, even if it was just 20 minutes of wobbly laps.

StillMedusa · 03/04/2021 00:33

My youngest learned at 14!
He is autistic and dyspraxic but we still wanted to give it our best shot.
However once he learned..he was never safe and after a year the bike went away and he has never been on a bike since (now 23) I doubt he could balance now either.

DD2 learned at 9.. she can ride ok but never enjoyed it. But the other two were on two wheelers by aged 3 and 4 (three year old watched his sister, got on her bike and just did it!)
I think it's worth having a few more tries but with dyspraxia, it's hard and while it's a good social skill, it's not essential!

FireflyRainbow · 03/04/2021 00:55

Mine was 10 if not older when he learned to ride. He will get there OP. He is still abit wobbly now as a teen, but is ok.

HoldontoOneMoreDay · 03/04/2021 01:00

Mine has dyspraxia and didn't learn until he was 8 or so. He's still not massively confident and can't really work gears/watch for traffic. He's 15 now. To be honest, I'm secretly glad he hates cycling because I don't think he'd be safe on the roads with his friends. It was one thing to do the wee safe off-road school run on his bike, but now his pals do mass rides across the city... I feel bad that he's missing out but I would fret myself to flinders if he was with them.

HoldontoOneMoreDay · 03/04/2021 01:02

God sorry, I didn't actually answer your post - find a safe place to practice away where his pals aren't likely to come across you and take the pedals off his current bike. If he's scooting successfully that's good because it's the same core muscles. And agree with a pp that he doesn't have to share/swap with friends.

CindyCollins87 · 03/04/2021 01:02

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5zeds · 03/04/2021 01:06

Does he want to?

@CindyCollins87 why is it unfortunate? It’s not like the child’s purposefully unkind or anything.

Herja · 03/04/2021 01:10

My DS has recently been having physio for coordination issues (not dyspraxic it turned out, just wildly different strength on each side). One of the things mentioned to me was a cycling course and also a special teaching guide. The physio also said she could have an assistant come to help teach him to ride a bike (it was one of the things he really wanted to be able to do) for a session or two.

I can't actually say what it's like, as DS's balance and coordination improved enough to manage to learn on his own, but it might be worth asking your GP about it, or a physio refferal? I was surprised to be offered this and didn't know it was a thing, but it sounds like it could be helpful for your DS. I remember the physio saying they mostly worked with dyspraxic would be cyclists.

Lachimolala · 03/04/2021 01:12

Humble bragging is not really helpful here is it @CindyCollins87?

@Fattydoggy I have dyspraxia as does my son, I finally learnt around 12ish and my son who is 10 in a matter of weeks is giving it his best shot. He’s not there yet but I think with perseverance he might get there.

What helped me was practicing somewhere no one could see me so I wasn’t upset or embarrassed etc. This is also helping my son, if he really wants to learn then maybe try going somewhere more private? Or even lessons with a bike club, our local one specialises in kids with dyspraxia and ADHD etc, that could be another option to look at?

If he’s not too bothered then maybe leave it for now and see how he feels when older, I found it easier to master the older I got.

CindyCollins87 · 03/04/2021 01:12

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IHaveBrilloHair · 03/04/2021 01:13

My Dd can ride a bike, but at 19 she can't swim.
Not everyone can do everything.
I understand you want him to be able to, and I'm sure he'll get there in his own time.
Try not to push him hard as it is.
You can take the pedals off any bike to make it balance bike btw if you want to give it a go.

Ploughingthrough · 03/04/2021 01:19

I don't think it's really bad but I do think it's worth persevering. My DD never wanted to learn but we insisted when she was 5 and half, took days of coaxing and insisting but she now loves to ride her bike at 8.
My DS is now 5 and also refusing, he loves his scooter so much, but we will also be insisting that he does it - he will thank us later.

I know a few dyspraxics who can ride bikes. He will get the hang of it in the end.

Ploughingthrough · 03/04/2021 01:21

Oh that's unfortunate, my 1 and an half year old son can ride a bike with no stabilisers flawlessly! He can do wheelies n' all!

your 18 month old can ride a bike can ride a bike?! I find that really hard to believe from a developmental point of view. Seen a few three year olds whizzing about but a toddler? It's not unfortunate, op's DS will learn if he wants to.

CornishPastyDownUnder · 03/04/2021 01:21

Its not that its bad-its just sad-for him. He'll be the kid that gets left out when the others are off on their bikes for the day. Its worth persevering with.

Caramelsmadfuzzytail · 03/04/2021 01:23

My ds is 15 and has absolutely no desire whatsoever to learn to ride a bike. I dont see why its so important. If they want to learn they will, if they don't, why push it?

Disneyforever1974 · 03/04/2021 01:32

My dad is 81 and still can’t ride a bike. Riding a bike isn’t a vital life skill so if he doesn’t want to learn I wouldn’t make him.

user64332 · 03/04/2021 01:32

One of mine learnt age 13, one aged 7 and one age 3. Difference with the three year old is he had access to a super lightweight balance bike. Had a heavy balance bike for all three of them (Puky, so not cheap) that none of them got on with. Got a super light one for the youngest and he was zooming round in a day and then we quickly switched to a lightweight proper children's bike (not a heavy toy bike like Halfords or Argos sell). All of the friends I know who's children are bike refusers who have tried my son's lightweight balance bike have also taken to it (after refusing theirs). So I really do think the weight factor is a huge importance. So is a desire to learn. My one who learnt at 13 just didn't want to learn sooner and had a scooter he preferred. I didn't push it (he has SEN too). My 7 year old is dyspraxic and we didn't push it until they wanted to.

So my advice is get the lightest bike you can find, and take the pedals off, let him use that as a balance bike. Tell him the basics-he needs to pick up speed to learn to balance, so somewhere with some gentle slopes is good. Once he's for the balance add on the pedals. There are loads of YouTube videos with tips. You can also help him learn his balance by holding the front wheel between your legs while he gets on, and lean it side to side, with him practicing putting his feet down as you tilt it.

The bike club is worth a try to see if they have any lightweight ones in his size in stock, without the upfront cost. Otherwise look at Vitus kids, Frog, Squish, Isla, Puky Pro, and Woom bikes. Remember to compare the weights for his size bike.

partyatthepalace · 03/04/2021 02:13

It’s a life skill like swimming or driving, so you want him to have it if possible.

Lots of good advice above re bikes but I would ring up somewhere that does courses, explain that he’s nervous and has some spacial difficulties and get him some private lessons if you can possibly afford it. It will diffuse the situation if you use a professional.