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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wanting the house back to myself

284 replies

Estherpologist · 30/03/2021 22:35

I get that lockdown has meant so many people have had to work from home, and the kids couldn't go to school, but having been the one who gave up their career to be the full time parent, and being the one who hasn't had the luxury of being able to leave the office at the end of the day and go home from their workplace, because home has been my workplace for 12yrs, am I being unreasonable for wanting the house back to myself during the day? Now that the kids are back at school (holidays notwithstanding) am I being unreasonable to be just a bit at the announcement "I'm probably going to work from home from now on"?

OP posts:
steppemum · 02/04/2021 18:13

I love all the 'get a job' comments.
because most of the people who have commented do work as well!
It is not about working/not working.

And I have to say that if my kids were still primary school age, and the wfh parent was working in the middle of the open plan downstairs, WTF are you suposed to do from 3:30 onwards and in the holidays?

Do you actually think it is reasonable for the rest of the family to not use the communal space because the WFH parent is using it?

Dh wfh, and he used to work in a corner of the bedroom, and now has a study. There is no way it would ever have been sustainable for him to work on the dining room table with kids in the house.

Jangle33 · 02/04/2021 18:32

OP you sound very privileged and entitled. Both my partner and I work. I don’t get time for myself on my own ever. I’m either working (at home as we are in a pandemic!!) or looking after kids/doing housework/other jobs. I’d be getting a job if I was you, working is not some easy answer for someone! Careers are highly stressful and bring responsibility. I’d be very hurt if my partner resented me being in the home!

nokidshere · 02/04/2021 19:06

I don’t get time for myself on my own ever.

Unless that's by choice that's pretty sad really.

LittleBearPad · 02/04/2021 20:51

It will be good when DH goes back to the office a few days a week and I do the same on different days.

The bliss of an empty house!

Original poster
Estherpologist · 03/04/2021 15:50

Thank you so much you lovely people!
This thread gave me the courage to start the conversation and there wasn't the backlash I feared. Quite the opposite - there was actually understanding and compromise. If that ain't a lesson, I don't know what is. ❤

OP posts:
broadstrokes · 03/04/2021 15:52

Good for you op! Glad you were able to talk about it and that your concerns were listened to and understood Flowers

jessstan2 · 03/04/2021 16:28

@Jangle33

OP you sound very privileged and entitled. Both my partner and I work. I don’t get time for myself on my own ever. I’m either working (at home as we are in a pandemic!!) or looking after kids/doing housework/other jobs. I’d be getting a job if I was you, working is not some easy answer for someone! Careers are highly stressful and bring responsibility. I’d be very hurt if my partner resented me being in the home!
Jangle, to what does the op seem entitled? She only said she would like the house to herself more than at present; I don't think it is unreasonable to express that (I used to feel like that myself at times), and she isn't likely to get it in the near future anyway. It's nothing to do with going out to working or not working.
billy1966 · 03/04/2021 17:24

Entitled for wanting a couple of hours peace in the house. 🙄

Gosh my entire circle of friends are one entitled bunch, they are all so looking forward to it.😁

jessstan2 · 03/04/2021 17:40

'Entitled' to what I wonder. You cannot just be 'entitled', that makes no sense.

I think everyone is entitled to a bit of peace and solitude sometimes, it doesn't always happen though.

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