Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect more help than this?

244 replies

iwillnot · 29/03/2021 08:58

Went on maternity leave in October, have a new job in starting in July.

I’m struggling with making payments on my car. Contacted the company to explain this and just got told it was a priority debt.

AIBU in that given how temporary this situation is they should have been a bit more helpful? (I’m not asking for advice as such just wondering if I’m being U.)

OP posts:
Viviennemary · 29/03/2021 10:21

If it isn't your DH's responsibility to pay your debts then by the same token it isn't really up to the finance company to bail you out either.

NoSquirrels · 29/03/2021 10:21

@iwillnot

Oh yeah I’ve no complaints. He does buy all the groceries nappies etc ... but I do have some debts that are just mine and I don’t want him to feel like he has to spend loads on them.
OK, but in the long-term you not having a messed up credit rating is more important to him, I expect? Your financial futures will both be better if you don’t default on debts and even payment plans agreed with the companies do have an effect on credit files.

As it’s so temporary, I would definitely look to sort it between you if at all possible. You can always balance it out again from July if you really feel you must compensate your DH.

If you can’t tell him about the debts that’s a different issue too.

SleepingStandingUp · 29/03/2021 10:22

@Viviennemary

If it isn't your DH's responsibility to pay your debts then by the same token it isn't really up to the finance company to bail you out either.
She's not asking them to cut the debt, just to allow short term restructuring which plenty of places have done, even before covid
Original poster
iwillnot · 29/03/2021 10:23

I’m not asking them to bail me out, just to reduce payments for three months which I could then increase later in the year when I’m back at work.

OP posts:
BillyIsMyBunny · 29/03/2021 10:28

Why should the company reduce your payments when you have a DH who could cover the debt? You’re staying at home looking after his child, he should expect to be covering the payments for family essentials such as your car. To be honest always baffles me when couples who have children continue to keep their finances separate, stop seeing it as ‘his’ money or ‘your’ car, it’s family money and a family car now.

Viviennemary · 29/03/2021 10:28

If your DH is capable of paying he should. Even if you agree to pay him back under your arrangements. You will end up with a poor credit rating.

Original poster
iwillnot · 29/03/2021 10:28

Why would I end up with a poor credit rating?

OP posts:
Viviennemary · 29/03/2021 10:30

You are unable to meet repayment agreements. Therefore a poor candidate for future loans.

Love51 · 29/03/2021 10:31

I can't see the last couple of pages. But on the bits I can see op is getting an unfair pasting. The advice is always contact your creditors, and that made her think it would go ok, and she is disappointed it didn't. She isn't shirking her responsibilities, she is looking for a way to meet them more slowly.
Personally i would bung it in an interest free credit card, that's my answer to everything, but I'm not sure if that's just because I / DH have good credit. We always stick to our repayment plan.

BarbaraofSeville · 29/03/2021 10:32

Because you're asking for an arrangement to pay on a finance agreement. Your credit rating will be marked as being behind on an agreement. This will affect your credit rating.

If you didn't realise this, then you need to go back to square one with your finances and maybe look at your whole family budget again, making sure that the loss of income due to you not working is shared fairly, not all on you.

www.moneysavingexpert.com/budgeting-debt-help/

Candyfloss99 · 29/03/2021 10:32

Get rid of the car if you can't afford it.

Racoonworld · 29/03/2021 10:32

@iwillnot

Why would I end up with a poor credit rating?
If you don't keep up with payments you'll get a poor credit rating.
Original poster
iwillnot · 29/03/2021 10:32

The thread is 4 pages long, less than 100 posts, I clearly say I’ve never missed a payment.

OP posts:
BarbaraofSeville · 29/03/2021 10:33

But you will be marked as being behind if you pay even £1 a month less than the agreed amount.

Racoonworld · 29/03/2021 10:34

@iwillnot

The thread is 4 pages long, less than 100 posts, I clearly say I’ve never missed a payment.
Yes not yet, but if you do miss a payment in the next three months because you can't afford payments.
Potterythrowdown · 29/03/2021 10:35

I can see why they'd be reluctant - there's no guarantee you'd start the job in July, you could change your mind or the offer could rescinded and then what? It's especially difficult at the moment where they are probably dealing with lots of people on reduced payments compared to usual times.

gildalilly · 29/03/2021 10:36

It's not a priority debt. A priority debt is one that keeps a roof over your head so don't let them lay that one on you OP. Lots of companies are offering better terms during covid so I'd ask about that rather than mentioning maternity.

Onjnmoeiejducwoapy · 29/03/2021 10:38

@Viviennemary

If it isn't your DH's responsibility to pay your debts then by the same token it isn't really up to the finance company to bail you out either.
I have to agree with this—trying to restructure your debt with the company is the absolute last step, if your household income is still fine then the company will see this as you choosing not to pay rather than being unable.

They absolutely have obligations towards you but they are unlikely to accept you not wanting to ask your husband for money as an ok reason to sub you.

Financial companies work in such a way with paying off their debts etc that a late payment is the equivalent of losing a chunk of money, so commonsensically it might seem like just a delay, but to them that screws up their business model. Hence why they consider a loan like this to be something you must meet unless under significant pressures and without other options.

Morally (and I think in the view of the financial company!) if your husband can pay it then he should.

Onjnmoeiejducwoapy · 29/03/2021 10:40

They will be particularly unsympathetic unfortunately because the circumstances that you are describing with maternity leave are entirely forseeable, and therefore something they will say you should have factored into your financial planing.

Original poster
iwillnot · 29/03/2021 10:40

OK MN are officially amazing.

I have just called them and i specifically said covid 19 freeze.

3 months break.

I think the mistake I made was mentioning maternity rather than covid before. THANK YOU.

Will read the other posts and defend myself now Smile

OP posts:
MiloAndEddie · 29/03/2021 10:41

Can I ask what your plan was for covering your bills while you were off and what has changed?

Could you work evenings in a supermarket or something temporarily to get more cash in?

Original poster
iwillnot · 29/03/2021 10:42

pottery maybe that’s what you/the companies you work for do I could sue for breach of contract if they did that to me and they could do the same to me in reverse.

Yippee anyway. I have more than £10 to my name.

OP posts:
Original poster
iwillnot · 29/03/2021 10:42

@MiloAndEddie

Can I ask what your plan was for covering your bills while you were off and what has changed?

Could you work evenings in a supermarket or something temporarily to get more cash in?

You can ask but I’d prefer not to if you don’t mind.

I don’t plan to work in a supermarket - it would effect my maternity pay and we have no one to look after Dd.

OP posts:
jellybellybanana · 29/03/2021 10:44

Yes they do because I told them!

You told them you can see the future? Your plan is that you will start a new job in July and will then be able to pay. But what if the job offer is withdrawn, or you can't find childcare, or you split up with your partner.....any number of things could happen between now and July. The company doesn't know that you will definitely be paying in July any more than you do.

katy1213 · 29/03/2021 10:45

If your income has shrunk because of giving birth to his child, then I do think your husband should step up for this. It's as much part of the package as buying nappies.