To have told DH that he embarrasses me?

[Mooni]

I have windows open all the time as I need fresh air. We live in a very quiet area, detached house on shared private drive attached to a quiet street so we don’t even get traffic noise. We have a walking path down the side of our house popular with dog walkers etc
DH can’t seem to keep from shouting constantly. You can hear everything from outside and I’m so embarrassed by it.
Examples from this weekend alone:
From bedroom to downstairs “Moonie, Chuck us a bog roll up!” (Bedroom windows wide open)
Kitchen to living room “Racist!” (Kitchen window wide open)
Living room to kitchen “this house smells like a cross between wet dog and BO!” (Patio doors wide open)
Downstairs toilet to kitchen “Moonie have you had diarrhoea?! It stinks in here!” (Window wide open, neighbours behind us sat in garden).

I have asked him to stop shouting all the time and he has said I’m being unreasonable to be embarrassed by him and acting like a snob pretending to be something I’m not. I’m not normally bothered by what people think of me but I think this makes us look rough as hell! No kids at home now, just me and DH
Am I over thinking it?

[me4real]

I agree and also think it's unpleasant of him to comment on the smell after you've been to the loo or whatever, that's kind of shaming. Most people would think of how others would feel and not draw attention to something they can't help. They'd just deal with it with air freshener or put some cleaning products around or something.

Men who go on about bowel movements and stuff are off-putting.

[incandescentglow]

i thought this was going to be the snapped and farted thread lol

[MrMucker]

OP-your worry is what other people think about this when they hear it and how they judge you. Hmmmm.
Well, in the whole world loads and loads of people have a shouty voice, and also in the whole world everyone has their window open at some time, so the chances are that in the whole world it is imaginable that shouting in the home at the same time as the window being open is normal human behaviour.

On top of that, I have walked past many many house in my time. Thousands. No, maybe millions (Im old enough). So in conjunction with the mathematical likelihood of a window being open and somebody shouting at the same time, I reckon I have walked past an open windowed house with a person shouting indoors at that precise moment quite a large number of times.

Thing is, OP-I have NEVER heard anybody shouting in their house through open windows on walking past.
Your worries are based on people who climb up the ivy, put their ear to the open window gap, and use an ear trumpet.
So really I don't think you'd should worry, because the street you describe is DEFINITELY the sort of street where somebody walking down the road with an ear trumpet would be reported by the window police.

[UhtredRagnarson]

This sounds like hell. I have raynauds and I feel the cold. You can't expect another human to live like this. Regardless of any shouting you're being unreasonable. I have sat and shivered in offices with blue fingers before because of fresh air zealots.

How does your medical condition have any connection at all to OPs house? shes not opening your windows. I can’t see where her husband has raised any objection to having windows open, and I suspect he isn’t the type to keep his objections quiet

[FurrySlipperBoots]

I hate to break it to you OP but I think it's actually illegal for you to be married to an 8 year old!

[partyatthepalace]

I mean... if his shouting has never bothered you I’m not sure you can stop him as it’s you that needs to have the windows open.

As a compromise ask him to stop taking about anything controversial or a bit grim - racism, diarrhoea etc etc ?

I don’t imagine your neighbours really care.

[LexMitior]

Your neighbours probably don't care but will also have decided he's an embarrassing shouter.

Also why is he shouting at you like you are the service? Looks disrespectful.

[overnightangel]

@UhtredRagnarson

Urgh. I’d hate this. I can’t stand shouters anyway. Talk normally.

Yeah this

[1Morewineplease]

He's probably shouting so that he can be heard over the Force 9 Gale blowing through your house.

[SofiaMichelle]

Your ridiculous insistence on having windows constantly open would fuck me off no end if I was your DH.

You don't 'need' the windows open all the time.

[StephenBelafonte]

Talking to someone through walls is rude full stop.

Talk to him when he's face to face with you and ignore anything else.

[NineOClockOnASaturday]

He sounds uncouth

[Nuitsdesetoiles]

@1Morewineplease

He's probably shouting so that he can be heard over the Force 9 Gale blowing through your house.

[Bluntness100]

@Mooni

We’re in East Yorkshire, upstairs windows open all the time, downstairs ones just during the day and when we’re home. DH says it’s freezing and walks around in thick jumpers but I hate being hot

I was with you till you wrote this. What a night mare that must be for him. No way I’d live like that, If my husband insisted in having all the windows open whenever I was home he could sod off and sleep in the garden.

[Bluesheep8]

And who in this day and age says bog roll?

In this day and age? Most people, I would have thought.

[Bluntness100]

@1Morewineplease

He's probably shouting so that he can be heard over the Force 9 Gale blowing through your house.

😂😂😂

[SchrodingersImmigrant]

@UhtredRagnarson

This sounds like hell. I have raynauds and I feel the cold. You can't expect another human to live like this. Regardless of any shouting you're being unreasonable. I have sat and shivered in offices with blue fingers before because of fresh air zealots.

How does your medical condition have any connection at all to OPs house? shes not opening your windows. I can’t see where her husband has raised any objection to having windows open, and I suspect he isn’t the type to keep his objections quiet

DH says it’s freezing and walks around in thick jumpers but I hate being hot

[FrippEnos]

Are you sure that he is not going deaf?

[UhtredRagnarson]

DH says it’s freezing and walks around in thick jumpers but I hate being hot

Thanks, I can see it now.

[DearTeddyRobinson]

Make him have a hearing check - maybe he needs his ears cleaned out. My H gets very boom-y if his ears get too waxy 😀.
Also get a fan or something - your house sounds miserably cold. Are you menopausal? Maybe you could both do with a trip to the GP.

[Beseigedbykillersquirrels]

I think your husband is putting up with a lot with your 'need for fresh air'. He's walking about in thick jumpers all the time because you insist on having windows open whatever the weather, so you're expecting him to live like this and put your needs first, then telling him he can't say things he wants to in his own home because of your preference for freezing cold. What sort of compromise are you making?
I'd find his childish comments annoying too but presumably he's always been like this?
I'd find being freezing cold in my own home more annoying than a loud voice. Why don't you live in a tent in the garden if you like the cold and wind so much?

[Flowers24]

Id be annoyed too as hate it when people shout up and down the house !

[LampsOn]

Your husband sounds quite fun! I think constant open windows would annoy me more.

[Nuitsdesetoiles]

@Beseigedbykillersquirrels

I think your husband is putting up with a lot with your 'need for fresh air'. He's walking about in thick jumpers all the time because you insist on having windows open whatever the weather, so you're expecting him to live like this and put your needs first, then telling him he can't say things he wants to in his own home because of your preference for freezing cold. What sort of compromise are you making?
I'd find his childish comments annoying too but presumably he's always been like this?
I'd find being freezing cold in my own home more annoying than a loud voice. Why don't you live in a tent in the garden if you like the cold and wind so much?

Hysterical! The whole situation just sounds really bizarre... The windy freezing cold house and the bundled up husband shouting inappropriate remarks about toilet habits! It's like a 1980s sitcom.

[DeeCeeCherry]

He knows people can hear him so he's 'performing' for them. I can't bear people whose voice becomes louder when they know their "funny and witty"🙄 conversation which normally involves ribbing someone else, can be heard.

If he's insistent on his right to a shouty and noisy home, not sure you can do anything much about that. But I bet if there wasn't a walking path etc beside your home, he'd speak in normal tones.

Tell him to cut out the performance.