To ask what your biggest regret in life is?

[SylviaPlath1984]

Or even what you feel you might regret in the future if you don't do it soon?

I regret not taking school more seriously or trying harder, not making more of myself.

What about you?

[Everythingmagnolia]

Bought a house in 2008 with a mortgage from Northern Rock

[Superstardjs]

Getting married. I knew I didn't want to but I knew I loved him and wanted to stay with him so I agreed.

[RiojaRose]

I don’t have any regrets but I sometimes wonder what would have happened if I’d made different A level choices or done a different university degree. I love my job but I get frustrated by its particular type of grind. I have fantasies about doing other kinds of work and there’s not much else I’m qualified for.

[IdblowJonSnow]

Many many things tbh. But mainly reflecting on how I treated others badly at times. Really wish I'd acted with more integrity throughout my life.

[SweatyBetty20]

Wasting my fertile years with a controlling fucking arsehole - I’m now 48 and childless.
Falling into work as a PA - it pays ok but it’s boring and there’s no progression. I wish I’d chosen a career that gave me a career ladder - for personal development and satisfaction as much as anything else. Now it’s a bit too late to retrain without taking a massive pay cut which I can’t do as I live alone and have too many financial commitments.
Telling my immediate family I loved them more, and taking the time to talk to them about memories. My sibling died two weeks ago (my parents in my twenties) and I’m so scared that without anyone to reminisce with, that menopause brain fog will make me lose them forever.

[Kpbffyjjgfi]

My regrets are ;
Have been with my husband since we were 16. In some ways this is amazing but in others it's not because I don't know an adult life seperate from him. We are very dependent on each other. Ive never had any other relationships. I love my husband but I settled too soon and for our first ten / fifteen years we're tough financially.
My parents forced me to go to uni, I had no interest in it and made little effort. Never used my degree and a waste of money and time.
I wish that we had moved away from the area we were both born years ago. We live in a very low income area and I don't really want to bring my children up here but now we are tied due to grandparents etc who don't want us to leave
I wish that I hadn't of started to over eat meaning that I am now very overweight

[CounsellorTroi]

Not going to uni
Wasting so much time and money on IVF instead of just cracking on with life.

[Nitpickpicnic]

Not being braver (and I’m a pretty naturally brave person) about leaving my marriage earlier. I honestly couldn’t believe that a man could change so completely in personality in such a short time.

My upbringing was 100% the ‘we stick things out, get things sorted’ type. I would never have married or had kids if I’d known this kind of turnaround was possible (without him having an actual stroke or similar).

Now I believe that attitude was arrogance on my part, somehow. I was too good, too careful, too willing to work on things. I regret that. I should have asserted my boundary far earlier and walked away, even given the high (financial) cost to me. I forgot to cost out the 10 years it took me to say ‘enough’. That’s expensive too. Sigh. So much for being a woman who doesn’t believe in regrets. Turns out one regret is enough.

[OrangeBananaFish]

Going to Uni. Wish I had gone travelling instead. After all the only thing which Uni did give me was the life experience. I could have got a great life experience by travelling the world instead.

Spending money on crap and getting into debt with it at times too. OK now, but I had such a good start in life and grew up with good money advice. I now live in a council house and will never be able to buy unless I am lucky with inheritance. Without spending all my money and getting into debt I could have bought a small house or flat back in the early 00's.

Kind of learning to drive. I hate driving and it is one of my triggers of anxiety. I also know that if I hadn't have passed my test I wouldn't be able to live in my nice rural village also I'd probably regret not learning too. So this one while I hate driving and wish I had a reason not to (like not passing my test in the first place) I do realise that it has opened doors and given me more freedom.

Working in an office. When I left uni I wanted my evenings and weekends free so found an office job. It was the one thing I never wanted to do, yet after nearly 20 years in various offices I kind of feel trapped. Really don't think I could go back to shift work etc.

[Cam2020]

Spunking too much money when I was younger. I had absolutely wonderful times but left me financially under-prepared for some of things that have happened since.

[schoolrummum]

Like Annie987 I got into so much debt and it's taken so long and so much stress to get rid of it. Not standing up to toxic people and distancing myself from them sooner. Being a people pleaser for so many years. All such a waste.

[OverTheRubicon]

Not leaving the first time he punched a hole in the wall, age 20.

[LeaveMyDamnJam]

Not pursuing a legal career. I was told by a QC I knew well, that I would have made a good barrister.

[daryldixonwonmyheart]

Trying to be who and what other people wanted me to be.

[Purplecatshopaholic]

Getting married to a cheating twat who I financially supported for years. Big mistake. No point dwelling on it, it’s done now (I finally got my act together and divorced him), but I just wasted so much time on a loser! Also wish I had taken a gap year between school and Uni and gone travelling. I had an unconditional offer to Uni and could easily have done it, but it wasn’t so common then.

[Beans13]

I'm 28, and really regret not living my life to the full the past few years.

I travelled the world and went out with friends constantly til I was 22. Then I became more of a hermit if I'm honest and got settled into a relationship, rarely went out, stayed at home watching TV constantly.

Lockdown has really changed me, I want to make sure I make the most of going to eat out, go on a shopping trip with my mum or enjoy sunny days in the park.

I also regret not being who I want to be and wearing what I want. Lockdown has definitely made me realise you have one life and to live it how you want and not be embarrassed about it.

I'm not going to waste my youth.

[Alonelonelyloner]

Getting married, having lots of kids and not getting a pension plan in place in my 20s.

[JamMakingWannaBe]

Not traveling more when I was young, free and single.
Not buying bitcoin.

[ThebirdsAndBeesWhereThere]

I have no regrets.

Good and bad experiences make me who I am today. I like who I am.

[topcat2014]

Having a child placed with us for adoption, only to find that after 7 weeks my wife couldn't cope, and so he went back to foster carers.

Nearly 2 years on, and I think about him every day..

[AnotherBoredOne]

@willithappen

My biggest regret is being so focussed on boyfriends from a teenage age. To the point I lost out on good opportunities.
I'm 28 now, I know I still have time ahead of me but yeah.
I went to the university nearest me so I could stay home and be with me boyfriend at the time (who of course was cheating on me the whole time). Got accepted to all my choices and realistically would have moved to Edinburgh and went to halls if boyfriend wasn't in the picture.

Went to work at a summer camp in America shortly after, best experience of my life, but of course I got involved with someone over there too. Most intense summer romance, love at first sight type pthing. Turns out he wasn't the best either (I have a whooole story on this). I was meant to go back to camp the following year but decided not to because the guy I had met was continue to pursue me (long, intense emails declaring love). I knew if I went back I'd have gone back to him and felt at the time that I needed to avoid that and move on. So yeah, never went back to that camp.
It's shut down now, or I'd have tried to get back a couple years ago.
I also fell pregnant with him, ended up having an abortion because of the distance, how he was, how young I was and how I felt at the time. That is 100% the biggest regret of my life.
I'm now in the happiest relationship but unfortunately have been unable to fall pregnant and doing IVF. I will always feel this is my karma for the abortion.

Please don't think that's karma, you made the right choice at the time.

[ColdTattyWaitingForSummer]

I got pregnant at 15, and dropped out of school, despite being predicted all A’s in my GCSEs. I then went from one relationship to another, and had 3dc by the time I was 24. I did do an access course in between dc2&3, but again, dropped out for a boyfriend. I don’t regret any of my dc, and I know my life experience is what’s made me who I am, but I had zero self esteem, was groomed by an older guy, and I sometimes wonder how it could have been.. If I’d ignored the bullies who picked on me for being clever, believed in myself, and pushed through to get an education. And I do regret how my relationships negatively impacted my dc, and my relationship with dc1 is still pretty fractured because of it. (I should add, I’m in a better place now, happily single for 5+ years, 2dc at uni, and one teen still at home.)

[OutwiththeOutCrowd]

I wish I had not let the behaviour of others impact on me to the point my mental and physical health were compromised. Had I had been stronger and withstood it all better, my life might have tracked closer to what I originally wished it to be.

[TedMullins]

Everyone I’ve dated. They’ve all been completely wrong and unhealthy relationships because I had an undiagnosed personality disorder and didn’t know how to form healthy attachments. I’d erase my entire dating history if I could, or at least have dumped the lot of them much sooner than I did.

[LittleBoPeep95]

Giving birth naturally.

Giving birth to 4 babies vaginally has left me with so many problems. I've already had to have surgery, but still need a further operation to sort things out completely. It's the absolute bane of my life. 100% happy with everything else in my life, but if I could turn the clock back knowing what birth would do to my body, I'd have elected for a cesarean each time. I wouldn't be suffering if I'd had c sections. That's my biggest regret.