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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

If you're still sticking to ALL the rules/guidance - why?

999 replies

RaspberryCoulis · 27/03/2021 10:50

Will start by saying I am not sticking to the covid rules any more. Obviously I can't go places which aren't open. But we have had people in the house, kids are going out with friends probably in larger numbers than are permitted, we're crossing local authority boundaries which is supposedly illegal in Scotland. Why? Because we've been in lockdown for a year, cases here are very low, and some things are more important than Covid.

But on every thread there are people claiming that they are sticking rigidly to every single rule and guideline, never breaking ANY rule. They would probably say I was a selfish covid-denier who was hellbent on murdering their granny.

So if you're sticking to all the guidelines and rules, without fail - why? People who are clinically extremely vulnerable (officially) I can understand in part if they're not vaccinated. But the rest of you? Is it because you're scared of Covid, or scared of your neighbours, or scared of breaking the law by mistake?

OP posts:

StarCat2020 · 27/03/2021 15:25

@XenoBitch
There is an exception in the rules in the circumstances you describe, ie. providing support to a someone who is suffering mental health difficulties.

This exception does not cover situations where people are simply fed up or bored of the restrictions

Robin233 · 27/03/2021 15:27

The people on here that have said they haven't are either lying or don't have that closeness and intimacy with people
^^^^^^

You can't 'know' that.
If you stick to the rules you've always been a hermit???

And it's ok for all the extroverts with close and intimate extended family and friends to see them now.

Any extrovert sticking to the rules is - 'a lair'

No we've seen what this doing and know people who died.

This was never going ti be a quick fix.

If we had been told that a year later we would still be in the middle of it how would that have helped?

It really is and always had been 1 day at a time.

Spanish flu pandemic went on for 2 years.

en0la · 27/03/2021 15:29

@mn81987

Totally agree with you OP, I bet all those saying they've stuck to it have bent the rules slightly to suit them! I'm back to doing what I want and having a lovely time!

How incredibly selfish you are.

en0la · 27/03/2021 15:34

[quote mn81987]@Robin233 I stuck to it until Feb, I'm not waiting any longer, survival of the fittest now as far as I'm concerned. [/quote]
I hope you aren't expecting any sympathy if you or your family get COVID.

Ormally · 27/03/2021 15:39

"The people on here that have said they haven't are either lying or don't have that closeness and intimacy with people and are quite content being on their own with their own immediate household."

Presumptuous. Offensive. Wrong.

By a long chalk, the thing I want most is to see them. My immediate family are, however, vulnerable due to age, and a minimum 4 hour journey away from me (and I would not be able to stay overnight either on the count of the law, or more practically, in their house due to there being no spare room); my household is not vulnerable, and doesn't have any special exemptions from doing things with slightly more risk, like being in school. Evidence suggests it would be a bigger risk to them than to me.

User133847 · 27/03/2021 15:40

@DontJumpInTheFountain

The frustrating thing, OP, is that when they decide what restrictions are required they have to factor in the knowledge that there are people like you who will choose not to follow them. That means that they impose greater restrictions than would be needed if they could be certain everyone would follow the rules. It means that the restrictions I am following are greater than they need to be in order to allow for people like you.

Law abiding citizens have been subsidising those breaking the law for the best part of a year now (there was at least near full compliance back in April).

Cowbells · 27/03/2021 15:42

I am most of the time because every one I know is, and I want this over. We've had no guests inside the house for a year. Obnly had guests over outside for dinner once last year and for coffee in the garden about four times. I go on walks locally, shop once a week and only walk with one friend, outside.

But I hugged a friend on a walk the other day because she is having a hard time right now. And I let DC's friend into the conservatory with the windows open and door to the house closed instead of sitting in the freezing garden the other day.

I also went on a residential work course that strictly speaking could have been cancelled or postponed. It was one of the highlights of my year last year. Wonderful colleagues and really productive. There's another course coming up soon which I've been asked to attend and I really want to say yes.

ElderMillennial · 27/03/2021 15:43

@Megan2018

Because I’m not a selfish twat. The rules are easy to follow and no big deal. It’s just a tiny bit of life to be mildly inconvenienced for the good of society.

This.

And because people are dying of Covid because of the unnecessary risks people are taking.

XenoBitch · 27/03/2021 15:44

[quote StarCat2020]@XenoBitch
There is an exception in the rules in the circumstances you describe, ie. providing support to a someone who is suffering mental health difficulties.

This exception does not cover situations where people are simply fed up or bored of the restrictions[/quote]
Yet according to a few posters on this thread, anyone struggling with lockdown is a special snowflake because lockdown rules are easy to understand and live with.

Honestly, MN disgusts me sometimes.

Fridget · 27/03/2021 15:45

I am genuinely aghast that anyone is enough of an arsehole to call lockdown being “mildly inconvenienced” and “easy to follow”.

You might as well write “I’m a privileged dickhead with no idea of the genuine hardship lockdown has caused for millions”.

PearlclutchersInc · 27/03/2021 15:45

Probably because I'm relatively obedient. More to the point, having come this far I'm buggered if I'm going catch Covid from some selfish git who thinks that the rules don't apply to them.

mn81987 · 27/03/2021 15:45

@en0la fear not I certainly won't be bothering you for sympathy 🤣. And as I said before, zero fucks given if you think I'm selfish!
I'm sure Monday you will be meeting up with people again, why is today different? 🤣🤔

RumHoney · 27/03/2021 15:48

Because I value my health and as a couple of introverts with no kids, work from home jobs and no family living particularly close to us it's not that hard for us to stick to the rules as the temptation to bend the rules isn't really there.

XenoBitch · 27/03/2021 15:50

And because people are dying of Covid because of the unnecessary risks people are taking.

People are dying if Covid because it is a virus, and you can still catch it and spread it even if you 100% follow the rules. That is not to say don't bother following them, but don't put all the blame for the deaths on people breaking them.

gurglebelly · 27/03/2021 15:52

Because it's not all about me. And I'm not a selfish bugger

kellehi · 27/03/2021 15:52

This thread has posts from people who are saying 'I have been following the rules and therefore so should you'. And then there's the 'But I did x, y and z (all against the rules) because of... [my own comfort/convenience]'

There are also people who are saying 'I have been following the rules and therefore so should you'. As though they have been religiously observing every aspect of every rule/guidande at every moment of every day.

Yes, I don't believe you that you haven't been doing x, y, and z also... I'm sure if your life was put under a microscope, we will find that you broke the rules, no matter how minor. Anyone saying otherwise is a liar.

ChangedName4TheSakeOfIt · 27/03/2021 15:58

I don't want to spread the infection if I catch it? But being honest? Selfish reasons now.

I don't want to catch it and be quarantined inside my home with the family for 10 bloody days! We already did that once when DD caught it (symptomless). We all had to be careful that we didn't catch it from her and restart the quarantine clock. It's fucking grim not being allowed out.

PregnantGotCovid · 27/03/2021 15:59

I have to take the people who say they are making sacrifices for the greater good or people they will never meet with a huge pinch of salt. Because they're not really, they are either protecting themselves, or their immediate family. Nothing wrong with that - but don't dress it up as something it's not.

I understand you now @RaspberryCoulis
You seriously lack empathy and you assume everyone is as self-centred as you are. It must be pretty depressing thinking that humans are all like you.

Luckily, you are wrong. Many of us make decisions every day for the greater good. It's called collective responsibility.

HerculesMulligann · 27/03/2021 16:00

I’m with you OP. Also I don’t understand how the “we must stick to Covid rules 100% all the time” people reconcile this black & white attitude with other areas of their lives.

For example I bet they don’t get angry at every car driving at 75mph. Or at anyone eating a steak which is contributing to higher carbon levels. But both of these actions slightly increase the risk of someone dying, be it in a car accident or as a result of climate change.

I’m not saying everyone needs to be perfect in every area of their lives (I’m definitely not!). But the overbearing focus some people place on following covid rules and guidelines doesn't look to me as though it is in keeping with how they live other aspects of their lives. If that makes sense.

PregnantGotCovid · 27/03/2021 16:02

I also believe that despite what the vocal crowd on MN say, most people are stretching the rules with their definitions of childcare, or bubbles, or caring duties or whatever.

How can you possibly know how 60 million people are behaving @RaspberryCoulis
Again, you are projecting your own self-centredness on the rest of us.

Robin233 · 27/03/2021 16:04

@kellehi
"
Yes, I don't believe you that you haven't been doing x, y, and z also... I'm sure if your life was put under a microscope, we will find that you broke the rules, no matter how minor. Anyone saying otherwise is a liar."

Nope
Pretty sure I've not been in anyone house or them in mine ...
Mask in supermarket or work place.

Stayed local.

Not a liar.

You cannot possible know what people do.

UserTwice · 27/03/2021 16:04

why would people lie?

I work from home. I go out for a walk every day from my house where I socially distance from everyone I meet. I go to the (closest) supermarket once a week at a quiet time of day to buy food for my family. In the last 3 weeks I've also been driving my children to school. I don't get out of the car. That's been my life on repeat through lockdown. Oh - I did go to the dentist once, but that's allowed as well. Put my life under as much as microscope as much as you like. There isn't an awful lot of variety to it to find law breaks. And yes, I am hating every second of it and my mental health is suffering. Every day it gets harder and harder to get out of bed in the morning.

And I know plenty of people like me. Perhaps you need to consider why you need to believe that other people are liars to justify your law breaking?

Ariela · 27/03/2021 16:08

I's am sticking to the rules because there are still an additional 800+ new infected people testing +ve every day. If everyone broke the rules now, then those 800+ per day will rapidly grow, regardless of the fact that over half the population have been vaccinated. This excess virus numbers floating about increases the risk of a new mutation spreading. That new mutation could just be the one that overcomes the majority of the current vaccination formulae. Meaning the vaccination has to be re-jigged to cut that new mutation off. Vaccination plans pause. Virus spreads faster. So then we go into new lockdown measures etc etc

Instead, if those 800+ new infections detected per day become just 80 before lockdown ends, then there is a far slimmer chance of the virus mutating to a more infectious variant that is able to spread unhindered. And those 80 new infections per day are more easily trackable and traceable to test their contacts and bring this pandemic more firmly to a halt in the UK. Which in turn would give us a more assured relaxation more quickly IMO.

Fridget · 27/03/2021 16:09

It makes perfect sense @HerculesMulligann

Professing to care about the vulnerable because they’re sticking to covid rules, but generating a massive carbon footprint without a thought for the unimaginable suffering this is causing to vulnerable communities abroad, or buying products produced in sweat shops, or any number of the countless things pretty much everyone in the country does which harm some people in developing nations.

I’m all for people sticking to the rules (as I am) but it’s the self-righteousness and indignance about others being “selfish” which I can’t stand.

jellybe · 27/03/2021 16:17

It's the law
I'm a training in the NHS so have to be accountable to that.
I'm not selfish dick
I'm teaching my kids to follow the rules
Why would I be self entered enough to think that i was above the law?

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