What has someone not done for the most ridiculous reason?

[HiyaMeAgain]

I'll start....

My DS didn't do the washing up today as there wasn't any room on the draining board for more dishes!!

My DP always just left their car clock too as they had no idea how to change it. I once changed it for them when I was waiting for them in their car. The panic that ensued when they thought we were an hour late for where we were going was hilarious. They realised very quickly what I had done and although they were amused I was warned to never touch the car clock again!

@FizzyPink

I sent DP to the chemist during the first lockdown for acetone to remove my acrylic nails and something for thrush but specified that I didn’t want canestan.

He came back with only the acetone and nothing for my thrush. When I asked why he said “yes you said not to buy canestan”. He’d said to the chemist “I’d like some acetone but not canestan” 😂

They must have had a laugh when he left

That’s brilliant!

My MIL didn’t wash her hands before visiting my sick daughter as she’d already washed then because she didn’t think they’d be water on the hospital ward

I've seen me watching crap on TV because I'm too lazy to reach out and change the channel on the remote that's sitting beside me.

@GrandTheftWalrus that's me right now, am watching snooker 🎱 that dh came down and put on before going back to work, really want to change the channel, the remote is a stretch away

I'm using pregnancy as an excuse, when I get comfy I don't want to move lol.

@TheVolturi

Dh once went to the local shop for something for our lunch. I asked for a sausage roll. Came back with lunch for himself and the kids but nothing at all for me because they had no sausage rolls! And Asda once came with no bread in my whole shopping as the generic white bread I ordered was out of stock. So no other white bread in the whole of Asda, really?

I had this with Asda and white bread!

I use click and collect, so I went into store. It was around 11am and the shelves were full of white bread. I couldn't see any gaps!

I remember being so annoyed that I sent a picture of the full bread shelf to my husband who was waiting in the car!

My mum doesn't change the clocks in her house - and hasn't for almost seventeen years because they run on my dad's name time. (from when he passed away.

Even when the battery is changed, if it's in the winter, it's still an hour out.

My colleague who was working with me text and said she wouldn't be able to work because she had woken up to "itchy eyebrows".

Now, if English wasn't her first language I would of text back asking if she meant eyeballs or eyelids but she genuinely meant eyebrows, I confirmed with my boss.

A bank nurse I was working with didn’t do a stock take of tablets left in the cupboard as she didn’t feel comfortable that she could do it...

I worked in a school and a particularly useless member of staff said she hadn't done her work for that week because she was thirsty all the time and every time she went to make a cup of tea there would be someone in the staff room who she'd get chatting to. Her lack of work meant 2 long-awaited school trips were cancelled!

BT told me they couldn't log my complaint about the fact that they hadn't set up my account (this was after A LOT) of phone calls because... I didn't have an account with them

Teacher (in his thirties) said he couldn't join in the staff rota for loading the dishwasher because his wife did all that sort of thing, so he didn't know how to.

He got a very smiley - and completely non negotiable - practical instruction session in front of the entire staffroom on how to scrape off plates, remove teabags, stack the machine, where to find the tablets, how to place the tablets in the dispenser, how to close the dispenser, how to shut the door, how to programme it and how to switch it on, then wiping the surfaces with the appropriate spray and cloth.

I didn't lift a finger myself on the grounds that the desired learning outcomes indicated he would benefit from a totally enactive learning opportunity. And, as part of the What Went Well (he did it all) and Even Better If, I made a very chirpy suggestion that he did this at home, too, as it would be a very good thing for his wife to see that he's a grown up and not a barely housetrained NQT fresh out of Halls anymore.

He did start by looking across the staffroom for an ally. They all abandoned him to his suffering.

Six months later, I overheard him ticking off one of the NQTs for putting their breakfast bowl on the side with blobs of Weetabix and milk still in there with the spoon.

I'd learned that one from a) having DP needing to know how to use a dishwasher because he'd never lived anywhere that had one before (although he asked how to use it) and b) watching The Simpsons, so I knew all about strategic incompetence.

Many years ago - a staff member explained his lateness because the "bell on the bus wouldnt ding" and took him well past his stop.

I once house-shared with someone who would spend ages in the (only) loo, blissfully unaware that others were waiting to use it. When challenged, the reply was "Well, I've always lived in houses with more than one loo."

We left our Christmas tree up til March this year because we couldn't find the protective box to store the intricate ornamental robin which was sitting on the top.
Finally did it 2 weeks ago, and now there's an intricate ornamental robin in the kitchen in an egg box and every two days you can hear DH shouting as he's gone to make fried eggs but it's just a fake robin in there.

DC declared they wouldn’t shower because it was ‘eating their soul’

Strategic incompetence - great expression and one my dh sometimes employs.

Anyway I think I might be able to win this one! When my DD was aged around six she took a lunch box to school every day and often it would come back empty apart from a lone banana (obviously any crisps/biscuits were always scoffed).

I'd question her as to why she hadn't eaten it and she had a variety of interesting excuses but my favourite was "I couldn't find it". The lunch box was approximately 8x6 inches.

@Stellaris22

DH hasn't changed the time on the car clock because 'I'll just have to change it again in six months'.

I'm ashamed to say Stellaris22 I haven't changed mine for precisely the same reason

In mitigation I change all the ones in the house ASAP

Once had a colleague who emailed in to say he would be an hour and a half late for work that morning because he needed a poo.

Worked beside a grown woman, like proper grown up, not a teenager or anything, who will her had a big standard cold or hay fever. Anyway, customer facing role. You were booked up fully and doubly booked so getting cover was practically impossible. Anyway, her nose was running, so instead of being a grown up’ excuse me nose is a bit runny got hay fever’ or whatever, she actually manages to make a HUGE fuss over the fact she had a runny nose , and WENT HOME SICK. She actually went home sick!! When someone asked me where she was, I said she went home. ‘Why?’ Because she had a runny nose. Fucking outrageous. This is in a business/company/department where I had been (unknowingly) suffering from norovirus. Was practically hanging off my desk whilst dealing with the public, and running in and out of the ladies to be ‘unwell’. Had to go up to a boss and say I’m sorry, I know everyone has been saying I look green/like death/ fucking awful’ and I laughed it off, but I really
Need to go before I can’t actually manage to get home. The response ‘well what about your customers? Who’s going to do your work ? This woman was a liberty anyway - always got pissed at lunch times and blamed other people when she couldn’t do her work. Don’t know how she got away with it for so long.

DH once brought HIS clothes in from the washing line when it started raining, but left MY clothes out. He didn't know what I wanted doing with my stuff, you see.

My DH keeps trying to get out of our cooking rota because he 'is not good at multi-tasking, and so finds cooking incredibly stressful' (this is also his explanation for cooking horrid burnt meals and sighing dramatically through-out). He does a highly responsible job in which I imagine he has to do a lot of multi-tasking. To be fair, he does seem to slightly freeze in the kitchen and find it inordinately stressful in a way I just don't understand . . . . and there are other aspects of housework he does without complaint.

DD said haughtily that she was "too busy right now" to put her shoes on and go to nursery when asked what she was too busy doing she announced "I'm watching paw patrol "

Obviously she went as she is 3