To ask if anyone else seemed to spend their childhood permanently thirsty and/or needing the toilet?

[Cheeseandlobster]

I remember another thread a while ago that touched on this and I was surprised I wasnt the only one.

I was born late 70's and my parents used to take us on lots of trips to random towns on the train, often changing trains in London. They would never bring or buy a drink until we had arrived and walked around a bit. Then they would buy one big bottle of fizzy drink which we all shared, often after salty fish and chips. I remember being more thirsty than I have ever been as an adult. They bought me a drink once when I cried as I was so thirsty and I was pleading with them saying I would pay them back with my pocket money.

Additionally they were obsessed with not missing connections for trains and we were never allowed to stop to use the toilet so I also spent a lot of time absolutely desperate for the toilet, again where I was nearly crying with the pain but not allowed to go unless there happenned to be a toilet on the train

I swore when ds was born he could always have a drink or use the toilet no matter what we were doing. And now I am older I am just incredulous they let us suffer this way.

They were toxic in many many ways, but was this normal for the 80's? Was anyone else deprived of a drink or toilet facilities for prolonged periods of time?

Water fountains had to be used under dinner lady supervision when I was at primary school - because yes, kids would always mess around with them spraying water at each other otherwise.

I had the milk at the bottom of my cereal bowl
Tiny cup of water for lunch at school
glass of dilute with tea

there was water fountains at school but I never dared use them as somebody would always smack you on the back of your head and you'd probably crack a tooth on the faucet.

I never felt thirty, everyone is obsessed with drinking water these days, its the bottled water companies feeding you shit on how much you should drink.

No this certainly wasn’t my experience. We were loved and respected and treated as important individuals. Needing the toilet etc was always a priority as was having a drink.

It was a little more rough around the edges - far too many nature wees and shared drinks than would be considered the norm now but never were our needs ignored.

The not being allowed drinks is just sinister.

I’m really sorry all of you went through that it sounds horrible :(

I was born early eighties and I don't remember being thirsty at all. If we went out we would take packed lunch but Mum would have brought squash or Ribena or something, we didn't buy lunch or drinks out but Mum always brought something. I remember me or DSIS bursting for the loo on long car journeys and Dad pulling into services, and having to use one ifof those portaloos in Paris on holiday where the door automatically opens after a period of time if you're not finished . So no they didn't make us wait .
Neither of my parents are great at drinking water though, Dad barely drinks and Mumhust drinks tea all the time . But that doesnt sound normal to me OP

My DM never ever drunk water, it was always squash or something fizzy which meant I grew up not being able to drink plain water. I always thought it was dirty somehow, so I couldn’t bring myself to drink it no matter how thirsty I was. This caused problems when visiting other people if they only had water to drink. I often stayed at my cousins for the weekend and there would only be water on offer so I went without as I didn’t feel I could ask for something else.

In the 90s, we were sent to school with a tiny bottle of pop that would be drunk at break time then nothing else until we got home. I remember being parched as I had finished my drink early and there wasn’t any option of a drink from elsewhere.

Born in the 80s and my childhood was not like that, we were encouraged to drink lots of water (fizzy drinks were only for Fridays and Sundays, though we had squash for lunch at school) and we stopped frequently for the loo when out (mostly because dad had a really weak bladder). Mum nearly always packed a picnic for us when out, to save money, which always disappointed me because sandwiches are boring compared to eating out but way better than just not eating!

Totally resonates with me, and I grew up in the 90s!
If we ever went shopping in the city, it was all about shopping and heaven forbid we asked to stop for a drink or lunch! Then we'd race to the train, be panting for breath but again no water. So no drinks or food from around 9am to 3 or 4pm. My mother didn't like to eat frequently. If we did need the toilet by then we'd have to wait for the train, if there wasn't a train toilet it was tough.
For school, we were given one small bottle of sunny delight to last the day. The lids didn't seal so you only got one chance to drink it. We were dropped at the bus stop at 8.20am and collected around 4.20pm, so that had to last us 8 hours.
It has totally affected how I live now. I still don't drink enough (DH always had access to water bottles growing up and so has a much healthier attitude to water) but I send water bottles to school with DS and make a point of remembering to take water out with us, even though it's not something I would naturally remember. I plan shopping trips with frequent breaks for coffee and lunch which makes them more fun for everyone! I'm still rubbish at being on time for trains though!
I think children were seen as the bottom of the pile in our family. In DH's family children were the priority and I try to live more like that.

I was born in 1970 and lots of the posts really resonate. Not the abusive ones- just the lack of access to constant fluids. We were allowed pretty much unlimited weak sugared tea and milk until tea time- but only a small glass before bed. Squash was allowed at weekends and fizzy pop from the pop man was a proper treat. Never chilled as there was no room in the tiny old fridge for drinks and we didnt have a freezer for ice

Sometimes a very special treat we would be allowed a small glass of my mums libbies orange juice (she was always on some seventies diet involving fresh fruit or eggs or cottage cheese) and at my grandmothers we had a small lemonade with a cocktail cherry. I still love that maraschino flavour. Ribena was a huge treat usually only when you were poorly. Or lucozade with the bright orange cellophane wrap

At school we had jugs of water with a sit down school dinner. Very rarely squash on special event days like sports day or Christmas dinners. Under no circumstances would you be allowed out of the classroom to the toilet so at breaks you might grab a swig of tap water from the loo. Once outside for break you weren't allowed back inside till the bell rang so you learnt to wee before you went out.

I don't remember hardly ever buying canned pop when we were out although sometimes older kids might offer a swig of Top deck shandy and we would pretend to be drunk. On long summer days we would be out all day. Sometimes my mum would send me with a Tupperware cup of watery juice but more often we had a well trodden round of out door taps to quench our thirsts. A particular favorite was at graveyard - or the odd mum willing to bring drinks out for a bunch of feral kids - usually after much prompting of said mums offspring "go on, ask yer mum"

Going for a wee was compulsory before leaving on any journey and we wouldn't be allowed a drink before if it was more than an hour as we never ever stopped. The only food allowed in any relatives car would be hard boiled sweets or maybe a murray mint. I hadnt been to a motorway service station till I got a national Express to university in the late eighties.

Strange to think how things change in just a couple of generations

@lalafafa

I had the milk at the bottom of my cereal bowl Tiny cup of water for lunch at school glass of dilute with tea

there was water fountains at school but I never dared use them as somebody would always smack you on the back of your head and you'd probably crack a tooth on the faucet.

I never felt thirty, everyone is obsessed with drinking water these days, its the bottled water companies feeding you shit on how much you should drink.

That is nowhere near enough fluid. We do all need to drink plenty of water. I get mine from the tap. If I don't drink enough I get a chronic headache

I thought about this the other day weirdly enough. My son forgot his water bottle at school and was complaining of thirst when he got home, as he’d only had the little plastic cup to fill up. In the 90s, I used to drink nowhere near enough water. At his age, I’d have a cup of tea in the morning, can of Coke with lunch and then often not drink anything until I got home. I often got awful headaches and was forever being taken to the optician or told to rest my eyes between lessons. Nobody ever suggested I actually drink some water. We had a couple of fountains at school which nobody used because they were gross and tasted like old pipes.

I also had a dad who was obsessed with never stopping anywhere. To this day he’ll drive for hours and not stop because he’s obsessed with making the best time.

I honestly thought we were the only family ! We only had milk which you just didn't want all the time. There was never a drink brought out anywhere,ceven on an all day journey .I was an extremely dehydrated kid. I can remember a blazing summer afternoon having to stand by father's allotment and mentioning that I felt so lazy (which meant energy less, from dehydration) so signalling I was thirsty ) no attention was paid to that. Here we are now, one of my kidneys functions less than supposed to. I wonder if there's a connection.

Not my experience at all.
(lots of other ways my parents neglected and fuck me and siblings up though)

born in the 70s, had water, cordial, if we wanted but mainly tea. everyone I knew drank tea from toddlers to adults, the kettle rarely got cold! and by 5 you were expected to be able to make everyone in the household's tea.

At primary school we had a jug of water in the centre of the dinner table. We use to drink out of the taps in the toilets any other time.

At secondary school we had water fountains at various places round the school, but they were almost impossible to drink from because they were nearly just a dribble, I remember after PE being really thirsty and and so frustrated how little I could get out of it whilst there was a queue behind me tapping their feet.

But no we didn't walk around with water bottles st all, I never remember being thirsty or may be I was and asked for drink and got one, so I don't remember.

same with asking for the toilet was never an issue.

I remember when I was about 7 or 8 my grandmother came to live with us for a few months. First dinner together she had a glass of water with her dinner. I asked for the same and was told to stop showing off

What I find kind of odd when I think back is that, with my own kids, when they were little, I always had a change of clothes, water, snacks and a first aid kit with me. But I don't remember my mother ever carrying anything bigger than a handbag. If I weed myself or spilled something or whatever, I could either sit like that or she would angrily march me home. She just seemed to expect me to be able to behave like an adult even when I was tiny. I suppose I can sort of understand that my parents weren't used to going out on trips out with small kids - as war babies they didn't have childhoods filled with leisure activities - but why it never occurred to them after the first or second time I don't know. I remember once going for a picnic at the actual beach and not being allowed to go and paddle in the sea because I wasn't to get my dress dirty. WTF?

I do remember a scorching hot day trip to Bournemouth with various family members and my young niece. We went in a cafe and I chose apple juice off the menu (I loved both apple juice and apple squash). When it arrived it was the teeniest portion of freshly squeezed apple juice, and I remember being told off for not choosing a different drink, as if I were to somehow know that the portion would be tiny, I think I was about 7 at the time. I wasn't allowed another drink or to ask the waitress for water and my young niece had a huge glass of lemonade and I wasnt allowed to finish that either even though she couldn't drink it all and some was left which seems ridiculous looking back, why they had to make such a point. I remember having a dry mouth and headache for the rest of the day.
I think I was thirsty as a child sometimes because drinks out were always fizzy/soft drinks, at home it was squash or tap water. I have horrible problems with my teeth now, and I swear it was from the endless coca cola and lemonade that we drank in the 80s and 90s.

On the flip side, I also remember forcing down the last of of a bought drink either in a cafe or from a can, as none was allowed to be wasted, so feeling bloated from drinking too much!

Sounds very familiar to me OP!

Can totally relate to all of this, my strongest memory of primary school is raging thirst, I can still remember the taste and feel of the corner of that horrible metallic tap in my mouth!

Also the completely inadequate food and drinks on family days out. More like forced marches, feeling dizzy and exhausted. 80s child. It was like my parents just never ever planned ahead... And never learned from experience. And they're not much better now.

Also as a pp was saying, lack of other supplies on days out. If it rained, you got wet. If it was sunny, you got burned. Inappropriate shoes, bags, etc. I don't think anyone I knew actually owned functional outdoor clothing back then. Just cheap "raincoats" and awful canvas shoes with no socks, so on a hot day the sweat made the dye run all over your feet. Fun times.

It's affected me too, but in a really positive way. I'm the complete opposite now, I always have gear and snacks and liquids for every eventuality! I love not having to live in that atmosphere of self-imposed scarcity and martyrdom anymore.

I was at school in the 70's and have been racking my brain as to drinks. Milk in a morning at school and those large, metal jugs of extremely watered down cordial at lunch. This thread has reminded me that we did make paper towel cups in juniors which I had forgotten about.
On days out: no eating in the car apart from maybe a mint or boiled sweet. Drink with a meal. A flask of tea for a small drink at the end of long shopping trip. I hated that, I so wanted to go to a cafe but that would have been extravagant.
Most of the adults, when I was a child, only ever seemed to drink tea. And eating and drinking on the street would still have been considered 'common'.

Reading this thread made me so sad. I did have an abusive upbringing and relate to the toilet anxieties but we were always allowed to help ourselves to water from the tap anytime. I think it is horrendous that children were denied liquids.

The thing about bedwetting is really weird. Surely even in the 70s (I wasn't born until early 80s) plastic mattress covers were available? I guess I can understand this fear in parents who were poor, maybe struggling to run a washing machine for wet sheets and nightwear daily, but families who weren't poor, I don't get it at all.

This thread is so sad I can't bear to read anymore!
What the fuck was up with parenting back in the 'good' old days?

@IdblowJonSnow

This thread is so sad I can't bear to read anymore! What the fuck was up with parenting back in the 'good' old days?

I think a lot of parenting ideals were pretty effed up back then. am not saying all parents were nasty. But there seemed to be a sense that children were an extension of their parents rather than individuals in their own right.

People today say children are coddled too much. Maybe in some ways but I have to say I much prefer to see children with their waterbottles and flasks, comfortable and hydrated, than tired, thirsty or headachey or struggling to concentrate because their brains aren't hydrated enough.

Also it is now known that children are more likely to suffer wetting accidents from chronic UTIs caused by holding in urine. I appreciate that maybe that knowledge wasn't around in the 70s but it boggles the mind as to how it could be seen as a good thing to restrict a child's liquid intake.

I don't remember my parents taking loadd of drinks and snacks out with us but if I was thirsty I would ask and get one when next able, toilet mum would always make is go and try before we left and if on a long journey again we would say if needed
They may of said services are 10 mins can you hold on?
But we didn't have a drink bottle on us permanently as thirsty doesn't mean having a sip every 5 mins
School we would be sent with one carton drink , but schools had water fountains then so water was availible
School trips though my mum used to pack about 4 drinks so no not normal for us

Oh and in primary we had milk at break or water and drink lunchtime
Not sure its bad to not have water to sip constantly as long as you drink enough
Throughout the day

I was born in the early 80s in Aus to English parents. I don’t remember being thirsty and not being allowed to drink. But over here death from dehydration is a thing.

I do remember that mum used to give us endless cordial to the point I only drunk water at school, and only when finished my juice box/bottle with cordial in it.

We also had many water fountains and lots free access and yes water did go everywhere and on everyone but it was outdoors and warm so....

These days people take their kids individual water bottles everywhere. On odd occasion I have forgotten my children behave like it is the end of the world, even if we will be home in 2 minutes...

This is a very sad thread. I was born in the seventies; my lunch box had a matching flask in it which my mum filled with squash. It was a very popular kind of lunch box so many other people must also have had flasks of drink. As others have said, we had big metal jugs of water at school lunch and milk at the morning break.

On trips out my mum would take flasks of drinks. I don’t ever remember being thirsty. My dad would also stop the car if someone needed a wee.

Sorry you went through this OP and other posters.