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AIBU?

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Original poster

What age did you have you babies?

318 replies

chonkyy · 16/03/2021 17:35

My mil has said that because I'm 30 this year we'd better get a move on and have babies soon because otherwise I'll be too old.. Hmm

I'm having yet another miscarriage so this feels a bit of a slap in the face tbh. I know that the risk increases with age but I'm 30 not 50!

Aibu to tell her to go away and I'll have a baby when I've lost weight and if that's a year or so who gives a shit

OP posts:
eloiseclay · 17/03/2021 13:49

31 and 32

OutComeTheWolves · 17/03/2021 18:53

@Amri997 no the poster didn't. You should probably re-read it because they very clearly said that 30 wasn't too old. Your rudeness was unjustified Smile.

Also I've found this thread really interesting op thank you for starting it and sorry for your loss. In our family my dh's side think we were quite old by the time we got round to having kids whereas my mum's side think we were youngish. IMO everyone thinks the age they had a kid is 'normal' and other people are a bit too young or a bit too old!

JaceLancs · 17/03/2021 18:54

27 and 28

Amri997 · 17/03/2021 19:44

[quote OutComeTheWolves]@Amri997 no the poster didn't. You should probably re-read it because they very clearly said that 30 wasn't too old. Your rudeness was unjustified Smile.

Also I've found this thread really interesting op thank you for starting it and sorry for your loss. In our family my dh's side think we were quite old by the time we got round to having kids whereas my mum's side think we were youngish. IMO everyone thinks the age they had a kid is 'normal' and other people are a bit too young or a bit too old! [/quote]
Yeah I have just re read it. My bad. She said 30 isn't too old. I misunderstood.

OwlBeThere · 17/03/2021 19:49

2 at 22 (not twins) 23 and 25. But I’m now 40 and many of my friends have toddlers and babies at the same age. My gran had her last child at 48.

Skatastic · 17/03/2021 19:55

25, 26 and 29.

shouldistop · 17/03/2021 19:56

Ds1 I had just before my 29th birthday and ds2 I had at 33.

I was one of the younger local mums with ds1 I found.

June1999 · 18/03/2021 11:36

19 & 20 Mmc at 21

laudete · 18/03/2021 12:05

Maybe early menopause runs in your MIL's family? Even so, that's not relevant to you. Check with your own maternal female relatives. Your MIL knows zip all about your likely number of eggs but your mom, grandma, aunties, etc can probably reassure you. x

toomuchtooold · 18/03/2021 12:40

Twins at 36, after starting TTC (and having recurring miscarriage) at 31.

You're way ahead of me!

cadburyegg · 18/03/2021 12:42

27 and 30. My mum had me when she was 42 though and back in the 80s that was considered positively geriatric

SVRT19674 · 18/03/2021 12:52

Fell pregnant at 43, gave birth at 44.

1990shopefulftm · 18/03/2021 12:54

25 and I m one and done, my had me at 25 and my sister at 39 and she told me the second time round it was much harder, my dad died in his mid 30s so waiting till my 30s wasn't for me.

TomBarbara · 18/03/2021 12:54

3 mcs then 33 and 36

Rutennotou · 18/03/2021 13:07

I had my first at 18. I'm currently 33 years old and 35 weeks pregnant with my second. Sorry to hear about your MC Flowers

FridayNightAtTheBronze · 18/03/2021 13:39

26 and 30

PetraRabbit · 18/03/2021 13:41

41 and 44.

LadyWhistledownsPen · 18/03/2021 15:02

I had my son at 35 and my daughter at 38

CausingChaos2 · 18/03/2021 15:07

@ComtesseDeSpair

Sorry for your miscarriages. Agree with previous posters, your DH needs to tell her, kindly but firmly, to keep her gob shut because what she’s saying is hurtful.

I suppose 30 was relatively late when your MIL was a young woman, particularly among women who didn’t have a career. It probably still is for women who don’t have careers as such: of the women I went to school with, those who didn’t go on to university generally all had a couple of DC by the time they were mid-twenties; those who did, not until their early thirties.

This has been my experience too. Those of my friends from school who went straight into work had children in their early- mid twenties. Most have finished having children now. Those who went to uni are either just starting now or haven’t yet (30ish).

I would have liked DC in my twenties but hadn’t met the right person/ timing wasn’t right for other reasons. I’m still glad I went to uni instead of having a family young though.

Diadora30 · 18/03/2021 15:08

20, 21 and 36.

blueroses8 · 18/03/2021 15:11

27 and currently pregnant with my first. Your MIL needs to keep her nose out, 30 is not old in the slightest! You have plenty of time left.

Usagi12 · 18/03/2021 15:23

Twins at 41, you've plenty of time. I'm so sorry for your loss, we've been there. Good luck with the ghastly MIL! 💐

TabithaTeacake · 18/03/2021 15:26

I was 21 & 25 when I had mine , but I am a gran myself now . I married as a teenager ConfusedBlush

Alfiemoon1 · 18/03/2021 15:32

Sorry for your loss
24 and 27

UnsolicitedDickPic · 18/03/2021 15:37

38, after three miscarriages.

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