To feed my 1 year old outside

[Dandylioness1]

My son is 13 months old.

I met my friend for a walk in the park this morning.

Her daughter is 2 years old.

We’d been walking a while and my son started to become unsettled and was asking for “boob boob”

I told my friend I’d stop at the next bench and let him have some milk.

She seemed mortified by this idea. She asked me if I could give him some water instead and that he was too old for me to be feeding him in public.

I told her I would be discreet about it but she said it was just about being discreet and that it’s also an issue that he’s 13 months and doesn’t need breastmilk, she said I should offer him water or a snack instead.

I ignored what she said I found a place to sit and let my son have some milk.

It’s made me feel pretty bad now and as a first time mum (who’s spent my sons first year in a global pandemic and lockdowns) i feel like I’m doing it all wrong. 🙁

AIBU to feed him on demand at this age?

I feel i’m going to start encouraging my 18 month old to BF at the park now, in the sheer hope I bump into one of the weirdos from this thread that find it so objectionable. I’ll make sure I flash more nipple than is actually necessary and will also encourage DD to say Boob as loud as possible.

When you do Megan2018, could you also remember to remove some clothing as I believe nudity in public is a key feature of breastfeeding your child.

@LolaSmiles

When you do Megan2018, could you also remember to remove some clothing as I believe nudity in public is a key feature of breastfeeding your child.

Absolutely! I wouldn’t dream of trying to feed without getting my vulva out for good measure. It’s all part of the ritual of making other women feel inferior after all. And my vulva is resplendent after my natural birth

Some of you would hate me, I breastfeed my 2 and a half year old whenever she damn well wants (which is all the time )

@Megan2018 😂😂 don’t forget to ‘whip’ it out!

@Megan2018

I feel i’m going to start encouraging my 18 month old to BF at the park now, in the sheer hope I bump into one of the weirdos from this thread that find it so objectionable. I’ll make sure I flash more nipple than is actually necessary and will also encourage DD to say Boob as loud as possible.

@Megan2018

Don’t forget to offer water, cows milk or a banana first though. Breastmilk is a waste of time, plus allowing your toddler to have boob when they ask for it is only a creating a need.

Ps. Be careful flashing too much of your “appendages” in public, @Wondermule and her crew will be waiting to get you!

Yep! Long lens camera and a bottle of Aptamil at the ready!

@Notanotherhun

Gin! Gin! Anybody?

yep. thanks.

I really hate these threads. They always wind up in a total slanging match

Those who successfully BF say they don’t feel superior but then some posters act superior and band together smugly mocking others.

Then there’s those who FF and who feel defensive about it because they say they’ve suffered judgement for it. Which then triggers BFers leaving passive aggressive comments saying they have never heard of anyone who FF being bashed and saying ‘why would you feel ashamed? Most of the country F’, but they as BFers regularly have abuse slung at them in the street.

It’s just so shit and everyone winds up feeling shit. Well, I do anyway.

Gah! OP you are going to cringe hard when you're out of the early years and encounter new mothers being all sanctimonious about breastfeeding

I did it for two years with two children and am completely pro-breastfeeding but there's definitely a "type" that become insufferable about it/wear it as a badge of honour/refer to it as their "journey" etc. 🙈 and you're definitely that type!

@NormanStangerson

I really hate these threads. They always wind up in a total slanging match

Those who successfully BF say they don’t feel superior but then some posters act superior and band together smugly mocking others.

Then there’s those who FF and who feel defensive about it because they say they’ve suffered judgement for it. Which then triggers BFers leaving passive aggressive comments saying they have never heard of anyone who FF being bashed and saying ‘why would you feel ashamed? Most of the country F’, but they as BFers regularly have abuse slung at them in the street.

It’s just so shit and everyone winds up feeling shit. Well, I do anyway.

Yep 😔

I guess my objective on threads like these is to keep it all in perspective. Posters are either like YUCK BOOBS or they’re banging on about breast milk being some kind of guarantee of superb health and intelligence.

The truth is that breast milk is negligibly better than formula. It also has the added benefits of being free, better for environment etc. But you really can’t tell the difference between a bf and ff child, the differences are so tiny you can only see them on a population level. So, basically, there’s no need for bfing mums to post indulgent sad little faces that other people have chosen not to breastfeed, because their babies have a perfectly safe and nutritious alternative which produces similar results. And there’s no need for posters to say YUCK BOOBIES because there’s an alternative if they don’t want to bf themselves.

Sadly what usually happens is you get the immature ‘bitty’ posters popping up now and then, in between long and thinly veiled braggy/scaremongering posts from bfing mums about how it’s SO much better for the baby, how it creates an otherworldly bond, how plying a child with ‘cow’s breast milk’ is disgusting (although I assume they give it to their kids as well at some point 🙄). As well as the usual outraged public bfing posts and oodles of comments on how ‘rare’ bfing mums are, of course.

The pros and cons should be presented in a factual way without all the immaturity and overly emotional gushing. It’s just food at the end of the day.

@Sunhoop

Gah! OP you are going to cringe hard when you're out of the early years and encounter new mothers being all sanctimonious about breastfeeding

I did it for two years with two children and am completely pro-breastfeeding but there's definitely a "type" that become insufferable about it/wear it as a badge of honour/refer to it as their "journey" etc. 🙈 and you're definitely that type!

^this.

Jesus Christ this thread is nasty. OP, feeding your thirteen month old baby in public is absolutely fine. Normal biological weaning age is somewhere between two and seven years old. It is our culture that says otherwise. Sadly there will be onlookers who think like some of the posters here but they are the minority. I would enjoy feeding my baby, knowing how much it winds them up

Hey OP, I’m still breastfeeding my 19 month old on demand - and yes, sometimes that means on a park bench. I’ll keep feeding on demand whilst we’re both comfortable to do so.

YANBU - your friend is.

Find a new friend. Someone who respects and supports your choices even if they don't agree with them. Feeling comfortable to feed your child around them surely is a big factor in how much you can actually class this person as a friend. Well done for ignoring their ignorance and putting your child's needs above your friends. Honestly I can't believe how people feel the need to give opinions on matters like feeding a child. It's one of the most natural things to be doing on the planet. Your friend has some issues, I hope she sorts them out.

@Wondermule you are still going arent you, interesting that you wrote a nice big speech agreeing with someone who said these threads can get really nasty and what a shame it is bla bla, then wrote "this" under a spiteful comment calling OP out and for being a "type".

your intentions on this thread have been the worst, hence why you are still here 34 pages down the line. that is why you are full of bullshit. wolf in sheeps clothing comes to mind.

Nothing wrong with feeding a baby on a park bench but it's a bit cold for getting the boob out!

At thirteen months babies have usually cut out or drastically reduced breast feeding, they eat dinners instead.

[quote Sugarbelle]@Wondermule you are still going arent you, interesting that you wrote a nice big speech agreeing with someone who said these threads can get really nasty and what a shame it is bla bla, then wrote "this" under a spiteful comment calling OP out and for being a "type".

your intentions on this thread have been the worst, hence why you are still here 34 pages down the line. that is why you are full of bullshit. wolf in sheeps clothing comes to mind.[/quote]
Crikey, and you call me nasty!

you have been - whilst claiming to of been helpful and so objective, when actually any opportunity that has arisen, normally when another poster writes a dick comment, you have pounced on it and used it as an opportunity to give the OP another little kick in. its horrible and it's gone on for 34 bloody pages.

She is claiming to HAVE been helpful.

allright jess, calm down

The truth is that breast milk is negligibly better than formula.
That’s not true though, is it?

At thirteen months babies have usually cut out or drastically reduced breast feeding, they eat dinners instead.

Well I’m 40 and have been known to drink a coffee or a tea on a bench. Is that a problem?

I eat dinners too and everything.

At thirteen months babies have usually cut out or drastically reduced breast feeding, they eat dinners instead.

Ah yes, it’s only infants who supplement isn’t it. Dammit, someone tell the £1bn UK market that it’s only for infants. Adults couldn’t possibly want to supplement, they eat dinners instead.

@LemonRoses

The truth is that breast milk is negligibly better than formula. That’s not true though, is it?

Science says so. That’s why the differences are only noticeable at population level. If the benefit was noticeably high we would be able to see it in our peers. We can’t.