to expect working mums to sort out their childcare

[nametaken]

Is it just me or do any other SAHMs get really annoyed when they get the 3 o clock phone call saying "oh can you pick XXXX up from school her nan/CM/school club can't because blah blah blah.

I mean, they choose to work - I'm a SAHM because I have 3DC and it would be a nightmare trying to organise childcare and I wouldn't want to inconvenience anyone.

I finally fell out with my friend today after one imposition too many. How nice of her to have me to pick up the slack week in week out and then when she finally feels guilty about all the unpaid childcare she asked me to do she swans off and treats her DD and my eldest DD to a cinema visit and meal!!!!!!! Something I would love to do but haven't got time to organise cause I'm too busy doing the drudge boring work.

Working mums - please don't think for a minute I've got anything against you - it's just a rant against the 3rd working mum in 3 weeks to need a favour from me.

I always used to do this because I thought "oh, well if I ever need something I can always ask them" BUT !!!!! I don't ever need anything.

Be honest, does anyone really think that SAHMs should be helping out working mums when their childcare falls through or am I just being evil.

[tissy]

if she's not slagging off working Mums she shouldn't put it in the title.

[PeachesMcLean]

If I didn't work, there's no way we could afford 2 cars and a camping holiday in France (simple or otherwise)

[nametaken]

and yes, the thread should be entitled "this woman sort out her CC" not "working mums" sorry about that - just a mistake in my stroppy moment.

[hunkermunker]

"they choose to work"

Should've said "she" chooses to work then, shouldn't you? Idiot.

[moonstruck]

I understand where nametaken is coming from- I am not generalising about working mothers but just sharing an experience! I have a friend who regularly inconveniences me when it comes to childcare. I have ridden across town in a taxi with my dc to collect hers and take them to school, only to find that i had to pay for taxi too! I have been in situations when she tells me she has to work the day before and i have have had to cancel plans as she has no one else to ask...there are many more examples i could give. I also have well organised working friends whom i find it a joy to help out. I think when you feel under pressure not to refuse and are given very little notice it does breed resentment. I think this is where nameske is coming from when she talks about the 3o'clock phone call- the feeling that your plans are changeable and unimportant because you are just a boring sahm!!!! (Which is the atitude of a few wm)

[LittleBella]

LOL and she should get shit on her shoes like I did as well.

In fact, she should be just like me. She's doing everything wrong.



Oh dear nametaken. You've got it bad.

[tissy]

nametaken, you need to step away from her. You are clearly very resentful of this woman, and seem to think that this woman's lavish lifestyle is funded purely because she leeches off you! Presumably her husband works too?

In your OP you mention three working mums in three weeks who have taken advantage of you. Why the vitriol for this woman? Don't the others have such nice houses?

[TheYoungVisiter]

maybe you should change the title to "how dare my friend have a job and a nice life and lots of bedrooms and wear high heels and still have kids?"

Sorry, I know I am being a bit unfair here, but what is mostly coming across in your posts is not resentment of this woman's childcare arrangements, it's resentment of her life full stop.

[Marina]

Oh, if we're doing Four Yorkshiremen lifestyle choices then I live in a 3 bed too, with one ancient sodding car, and we both have to work outside the home to make ends meet.
But hurrah, trying to put one over on the much wealthier one-income families we know through school is a big compensation for all that hardship
PMSL YoungVisiter that'll be me on Saturday...

[Reallytired]

I suspect that nametaken is a troll, who has very little in her life. Otherwise she would not have the time to write nasty posts upsetting working mums.

[nametaken]

hunkermunker, do you really think it's necessary to resort to name calling?

[TheYoungVisiter]

Well I live in a coal hole with no shoes. Oh no, sorry that was my grandad's childhood not mine.

I live in a 2 bedroom 1st floor flat with one car (an ancient skoda, well over 6 years old). And no shoes.

[kslatts]

| think you YABU, I am a wohm and am very lucky that my mum is a cm so don't normally have any problems with childcare. I have asked dd's friends mum to collect dd from school on a couple of occasions, but I do her favours to, I collect her dd from brownies once a week as I drive and she doesn't. We are friends so I don't really think about who does the most for each other.

[hunkermunker]

Oh, probably not.

But if the cap fits...

[LuckyUnderpants]

'unimportant because you are just a boring sahm!!!! (Which is the atitude of a few wm)'

must just be the ones you know then moonstruck

fwiw i would love to be a sahm. i have to work because i am a one parent family so i am the sole provider, and my childcare is sorted, i dont rely on friends i pay for full time childcare and that is not because i am working mum, it is because i am a conciderate reponsible person.

[nametaken]

Reallytired I am not a troll - I am a genuine person who made a genuine mistake and have already apologised for it. For the second time, I admit I should have said "this woman" not "working mums" .

[moonstruck]

If i had three frinds like the one i mentioned earlier i would be p**ed off too, namessake.

[Marina]

Ah, but do you have to get up to go to work to pay for all that luxury before you went to bed, YoungVisiter? Glory Hallelujah

[bozza]

I hope on the occasions when I have relied on friends to help they are not secretly so resentful. I work part time, and do try to do my fair share of return favours as much as possible. I have my childcare sorted but what do I do if the childminder is ill, DH is working away and I have an important meeting? I can either miss my meeting, or ask a friend to collect DS from school for a couple of hours.

[nametaken]

Reallytired I am not a troll - I am a genuine person who made a genuine mistake and have already apologised for it. For the second time, I admit I should have said "this woman" not "working mums" .

[hunkermunker]

[2shoes]

I am a SAHM and I used to moan (privately) Abot my working friend as she did take the piss a bit. BUT if I needed help she helped. she got me through the rank time when dd was only doing 3 days at sn school
glad I helped.

[LittleBella]

LOL, it's not just the working mum's versus this woman thing, it's this woman's childcare versus this woman's life.

I agree with whoever said it's her life you're pissed off with, not her childcare arrangement. And that implies that you are discontent with your own life. People who are happy with their lives, don't care whether their friends have a bigger house or a better job than them. It just doesn't even enter their heads.

[TheYoungVisiter]

Marina, yes indeed, when I am not rolling in the aisles at Bluewater I am swanning around in high-heels three days a week, keeping my son in coal-sacks and myself in gin.

In short I am part-time aisle-roller, part-time skivvy, full-time gin-drinker.