Holiday decline aibu

[Namechange19op]

Worked at my current employer just over 1 year less than 2

Im a single mum one little boy aged 7 my parents and family live in wales and I am in london and his dad isnt around much

Work told me today the holiday I requested for easter school holidays are declined because its over a busy period and they dont allow holidays at that time

I did work there last year at the same busy time but they altered my role to wfh with covid. My job cant really be done at home full time I open post do filing print alot of docs etc and so am back in our office. I asked if I could wfh this time but the tasks i need to do are office based.

The company is small around 20 people and 1 other lady does same job as me but no kids so she doesnt care about holidays ban

Aibu to think this is unfair. I have ZERO help. I earn a pittance (around 11k) work either mornings or afternoons depending on the day.

Senior management are not budging as other people asked for holidays and got declined. Hr is outsourced.

Aibu to think i should be given this time off

Workplaces need to give us all more flexibility to live our lives around caring for our loved one. As a society our attitudes need the shift on this and move forward. 50% of the population is female, many have kids, Children can’t look after themselves, most people need to work to pay their bills so as a society we all need to be more flexible rather than a business comes first attitude. You are not being unreasonable, they should take your circumstances into account.

Workplaces do. It is unusual for companies to do it if there is no business reason. But if a business has a particularly busy period that generally falls during a school holiday, they shouldn't be forced to lose half their workforce when things are really busy.

OH works for an organisation that has 3 very busy 3 or 4 week periods a year. These periods make up the vast majority of the profit they make for the year. They cannot afford to have staff off, particularly in his department, at that time. Thankfully it doesn't coincide with any school holidays but if it did, he just wouldn't have taken the job. It is wrong to suggest they aren't a flexible employer - they've just given him a paid month off to deal with DD's latest surgery.

If you are, say, running an after school and holiday club for kids, it stands to reason you would restrict people taking holidays during school holidays and that isn't unreasonable.

I'm all for flexible working, and despite your insinuation this is to help mothers, it actually is needed to help all parents. But we also have to remember that businesses need to be able to operate to meet their business requirements.

So a child-free adult should pick up the slack?

I'm not sure this is about picking up slack. The child free adult gets the benefit of being able to take holidays outwith school holidays.

Before I had kids, I never needed school holidays off. I wouldn't have been bothered if the company had a policy that only those with children could routinely take holidays during school holidays.

I don't think as a society we can expect all employers affected by tax year end being over Easter this year to allow all people with childcare responsibilities the time odd if they need it. They need people in when they are busiest. It would be like taking time off over the weekend before Christmas in retail.

The child free adult gets the benefit of being able to take holidays outwith school holidays.

so they get the benefit to not have holidays at Christmas, Easter, July and August? Lucky them....

The child free adult gets the benefit of being able to take holidays outwith school holidays.

So, they never want to spend Easter/Christmas/whatever with family who live far away? They never have a partner who can only holiday in school holidays?

@MintyMabel

So a child-free adult should pick up the slack?

I'm not sure this is about picking up slack. The child free adult gets the benefit of being able to take holidays outwith school holidays.

Before I had kids, I never needed school holidays off. I wouldn't have been bothered if the company had a policy that only those with children could routinely take holidays during school holidays.

What and miss out on easter/Christmas celebrations and holidays in the warmer times, festivals etc just because they haven't got children? I think that would lead to resentment.

It would also lead to employers not recruiting people with children if they already have a few on the team.

Workplaces need to give us all more flexibility to live our lives around caring for our loved one.

The OP's workplace allowed her to do a totally different role last year so she could work from home. They are clearly very flexible.

Workplaces need to give us all more flexibility to live our lives around caring for our loved one
They already give plenty of flexibility because it's become the law.

What they don't have and shouldn't have to do is have their business rules by the demands of parents. Not every worker is apparent of young kids, and have their lives dictated by parents.

No parent should have a right to work and decide when they want to look after their kids because they don't want to put their kids in childcare. In almost all cases, it's not even about the childcare itself, because they already use it anyway,but the fact that they don't want to pay for it.

So it's ok for the business to potentially lose thousands of not million of pounds because a few employees don't want to spend £50?

Some people really need to get over themselves. Plan your childcare in advance and accept that at times it will cost you money.

Many work places would struggle to provide flexibility around caring for loved ones, whilst still fulfilling the business needs.
Many work places have holiday restrictions. I can't take off Easter week, December, Mothers day weekend, 4 days before Halloween and the annual stock take weekend. That is the same for all my colleagues.

It does not help the OP in the current situation that is faced, but if the financial and tax year end is the reason that the employer is busy and declines all leave, perhaps another reason to move it.

In February and March roads get dug up a lot as money is spent before the end of the financial year. If the financial and tax year ended on August 31st, all this work would be in July and August with warmer weather and longer daylight. The busy period for accountants and tax people would be in September when children are back at school, so the issue the OP and others face would not arise.

Every place I have worked this century it's first come first served for hols, apart from Xmas when people ask for what they want and Team Leaders sort out what's fair.
Odd moan about parents being given priority but it's not true. They are just more organised and less spontaneous. No point people moaning because 2days before late May bank holiday they fancy Tuesday and Wednesday off and it can't be done. It's already gone cos that's half term week.

Good idea, I'd sign a petition for that

@MuddleMoo

It would also lead to employers not recruiting people with children if they already have a few on the team.

exactly. And frankly rightly so.

@SorryAuntLydia that’s hardly comparable. Breaking my leg is unforeseen and an accident. Easter holidays and childcare have been foreseen for ages and ages

[quote EL8888]@SorryAuntLydia that’s hardly comparable. Breaking my leg is unforeseen and an accident. Easter holidays and childcare have been foreseen for ages and ages[/quote]
@EL8888
Indeed. But a pandemic lockdown with the op unable to use the GPs as childcare and with significant restrictions on alternative childcare is also not foreseeable.

But a pandemic lockdown with the op unable to use the GPs as childcare and with significant restrictions on alternative childcare is also not foreseeable
Not foreseeable? Since lockdown in November? Really? OP has plenty of time to look for childcare arrangements.

@MintyMabel

So a child-free adult should pick up the slack?

I'm not sure this is about picking up slack. The child free adult gets the benefit of being able to take holidays outwith school holidays.

Before I had kids, I never needed school holidays off. I wouldn't have been bothered if the company had a policy that only those with children could routinely take holidays during school holidays.

Maybe, just maybe, we don't want to take our holidays when you think is best for us. Maybe we too have reasons for wanting time off in school holiday periods. I wonder if you can think of any?

@El8888

But the OP has known she isn't allowed Easter off for at least a year, neither is the pandemic and lockdown something that has just happened. There has been plenty of time for her to make arrangements rather than just expecting her employer to go along with it.

@dontdisturbmenow

But a pandemic lockdown with the op unable to use the GPs as childcare and with significant restrictions on alternative childcare is also not foreseeable Not foreseeable? Since lockdown in November? Really? OP has plenty of time to look for childcare arrangements.

I agree. It has been quite obvious that there would be further periods of restriction.

Also, the GPS can't help because they are working.

Indeed. But a pandemic lockdown with the op unable to use the GPs as childcare and with significant restrictions on alternative childcare is also not foreseeable.

OP said GPs couldn't help as they were busy.
And she hasn't even looked for alternative childcare.

I have to admit, I'm amazed that not a single person has suggested that, just maybe, the child's father should take some responsibility here. Particularly all those who think the OP's (pretty flexible) employer is BU.

@sweeneytoddsrazor that is my exact point. She’s know she has a child for years and the issues with annual leave at Easter. Why with less than a month to go then nothing is sorted?

@UserTwice exactly. My sarcastic eyebrow raise a few pages back was about contacting an MP. I didn’t know if that meant about her employer or child’s father not doing his fair share. 50/50 of the holidays are his responsibility surely?

Maybe, just maybe, we don't want to take our holidays when you think is best for us. Maybe we too have reasons for wanting time off in school holiday periods. I wonder if you can think of any?

You don't have a Golden Womb so you clearly don't deserve any time off. Know your place, woman.

@HeyDemonsItsYaGirl

Maybe, just maybe, we don't want to take our holidays when you think is best for us. Maybe we too have reasons for wanting time off in school holiday periods. I wonder if you can think of any?

You don't have a Golden Womb so you clearly don't deserve any time off. Know your place, woman.

Brilliant!

Yes - I may be the only senior manager in my organization who has no kids; but, I usually go on holiday with a friend who is a teacher. In what way would that be fair? Or, do I have to continue to worship at the altar of fecundity, and let them all have first dibs?

You need the kid's father to take some responsibility - even if it is him just paying for the childcare.