The 'sayings' that were fashionable in school, stay with you forever

[FrankButchersDickieBow]

I remember a saying with school, that if you sneezed 8 times on the run, you would have an orgasm. I'm forty fuckin three and just sneezed 6 times on the run andi never thought 'oh I need a tissue' I thought, 'ooh another 2 sneezes and I'll have an orgasm' 🤣🤣

Nothing fact based please.

Just the sayings that went round in school that you kinda believed but were vvu!!

[demelza82]

'Its a biological fact thatif a boy is horrible to you, he likes you.

Luckily I was knowingly too fugly to believe this but it set up my friends up for a lifetime of toxic relationships

[LunaMay]

"doyoulickadickaday?"
Hhahaha we thought we were so clever saying this to random people.

I'm Australian but i do remember a version of the celebrity/girl getting their stomach pumped and litres of 'spunk' being found.

I think most year groups had the story about the girl and the dog as well, always felt sorry for whatever girl they targeted for that one.

[FrankiesKnuckle]

At least once a term a rumour would fly around the school that the "Chelsea Smilers" were lying in wait for us down a wooded path next to the school.

Why a bunch of fabled gangsters would turn up in a leafy part of south London just to terrorise a bunch of hysterical school kids is beyond me.

[CovidKingfisher]

Darren in front of me asked if he could keep one if his in a tank as a pet.. she had to excuse herself from the room

That's so funny 😂

The story of the kid who looked at his maths GCSE and clearly thought "fuck this, I'm done with life" and shoved his two regulation pencils up his nostrils and then violently banged his face on the desk, forcing those pencils into his brain and killing him immediately

Oh.My.God 😱

[IntermittentParps]

The story of the kid who looked at his maths GCSE and clearly thought "fuck this, I'm done with life" and shoved his two regulation pencils up his nostrils and then violently banged his face on the desk, forcing those pencils into his brain and killing him immediately
I'd forgotten that one! Although in my school I think the boy was supposed to have just stuck one pencil up his nose, then fallen asleep leaning on one hand and the brain thing happened.

[GameSetMatch]

If you walk under a street sign without holding your breath you will become a lesbian 😂

[Itsjustricemichael]

Not the same kind of saying but the other day someone said something super annoying and I found myself going "Did you have a brain tumour for breakfast Heather?" IMMEDIATELY followed by thinking your 45, that's inappropriate and thank God it's lockdown and you are having this conversation by yourself in the kitchen.

[TheCrowening]

In our school kids would go up to other kids and ask, “Are you a benny tied to a tree?” and if the answer was “No!” they’d start chanting “Benny on the loose! Benny on the loose!”

[LadyMonicaBaddingham]

@MissDollyMix at my high school it was sooooo uncool to wear your backpack on [gasp] both shoulders... I occasionally remember that and inwardly smirk when I at least used to wave my boys off with their friends (all with backpacks on two shoulders 😂)

[the80sweregreat]

Some of the things that were said in my East London comp would get my post removed!
I cringe at what people were called who had learning disabilities. Not by me I hasten to add. Some of the kids there were horrible.
I remember the button rhyme . You had to count the buttons downwards and wherever it stopped that's who you would marry.
' tinker, Taylor , soldier , sailor , rich man poor man , beggar man , thief'
( I married a poor one , so that was correct!) I
Loved playing hopscotch. There was another rhyme for that and when we did skipping but I can't remember it ( pepper pot or something?)

[FelicityBeedle]

Oh I’ve remembered another! If someone died in the exam hall everyone would get their predicted grades, or an A depending on who was saying it. Lots of joking about taking one for the team before exams

[ChiefBabySniffer]

@LunaNorth

May interest you to know that guinea pigs don't even have tails 😂

We had a dinner lady that we nicknamed skeletor and she was truly frightening. When she was on play ground duty nobody was ever naughty as we were terrified she would touch us and lead us inside to be punished. I still live in the town now and she her every week with her shopping trolley. She's about 65 and still looks the same so she must have been about 30 at the school but looked ancient . Very odd.

We're had a substitute teacher we called Mrs magoo due to her thick glasses. One after noon and she brought in a cow heart to show us for science and we all freaked out big time. We had been winding her up all week to be fair and the screams of horror really offended her. She slammed the heart down on the silver tray and watery copper smelling blood splattered all the kids in the first row of the semi circle. It got worse, people started crying and running for the door. A boy stuck his fingers into the arteries and a kid threw up in the bin. The teacher never came back. Everything was measured against that day afterwards. Having a bad day? Bet it's not as bad Mrs magoo and the splattered heart. Feeling sick? Aim for the bin like Lydia did. We etched dripping hearts into the desks and it really bonded us together as a class. A class of total animals.

I'd like to say that was the first and only substitute teacher we ran off but it wasn't. We were absolute monsters.

[TiniestFluffiestBunny]

We also had a strict code about not having your shirt collar poking out from under your sweater. To wear it like that would have been social suicide. Now my children (at primary) like to wear their shirt collars poking out of the sweaters and it still makes me itch!

When I moved from the North East to the Home Counties in year 9, I moved from a school where wearing the collar out was social suicide to one where wearing it in would get you mocked.

I was so conflicted!

[LAgeDeRaisin]

We weren't allowed to play British Bulldog in the playground because it was said that somebody had once lost a pinky.

[EBearhug]

' tinker, Taylor , soldier , sailor , rich man poor man , beggar man , thief'

That's cherry stones, not buttons!

[HarrietOh]

Yes the shirt collar thing! Also not wearing a backpack on both shoulders or you were 'gay'

Everyone facing the wall in the changing room as if you so much as slightly glanced at a fellow girl you were a lesbian.

[the80sweregreat]

@EBearhug

' tinker, Taylor , soldier , sailor , rich man poor man , beggar man , thief'

That's cherry stones, not buttons!

I remember counting the buttons down on my cardigan ! 😀
I did go to a rough school though. We didn't have any cherries !

[CovidKingfisher]

@LAgeDeRaisin

We weren't allowed to play British Bulldog in the playground because it was said that somebody had once lost a pinky.

Lost a pinky? We were told a child had been crushed to death

[B33Fr33]

I used to make a beeline for the "lezza" log on our school field. Maybe I just knew but I also couldn't give a fuck because it was only the self appointed "fashion experts" that ever said that, nasty bunch. I remember one of them trying to take the piss out of me in an art lesson interrogating me about my weekly evening activities. And she thought I was weird I think she was called Alex. She was always asking what my brother was doing as well. So many tried to get to know my brother through me. It was vile. I used to warn him which ones thought I would pimp him out.

[BashfulClam]

We had an urban myth about a guy using an open bottle to penetrate his partner during sex and the vacuum created pulled her intestines out...

[Meredithgrey1]

@Bellver888

Did anyone get told about that person who put 5 fruit pastels in his girlfriends vagina and swallowed one extra that was a “HIV lump” or were we just over imaginative

Yes! That was gross

[FenceSplinters]

@FrankiesKnuckle did you go to school in Petts Wood? I lived in fear of the Chelsea Smilers!

[FenceSplinters]

I still won’t wear a coat because wearing a coat is soooooo uncool! I’m 42 🤣

[Maggie900]

That if you walk over 3 drains you will have bad luck and the only way to counteract it, is to say ‘mushrooms’ after you’ve walked over them.

Still to this day, I avoid them or say ‘mushrooms’ in my head if I accidentally go over them. It’s incredibly annoying but so deeply ingrained 😂

[Sunshineonarainydayy]

"There was a rumour going round at school that someone ate a McChicken Sandwich at McDonalds and they asked for no mayo but when they bit into it, it had mayo inside that turned out to be a burst cyst from the chicken. I never ate one again (and that was 30 odd years ago)!"

Yes!! I remember this!