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Original poster

My boyfriend just called me his ex wife’s name

56 replies

Qbfjold · 23/02/2021 21:33

NC for this....

My boyfriend of nearly a year just called me his ex-wife’s name in the middle of having sex.

My rational side says it’s just a brain fart, it’s habit for him to say her name. My less rational side is freaking out.

What would you make of this?

OP posts:
Muskox · 23/02/2021 21:34

I've done this before Blush I wasn't still in love with my ex, it just popped out. I hope he apologised OP!

Lubiluxe · 23/02/2021 21:35

Did he apologise? I wouldn't be concerned unless you have suspicions ?!

Original poster
Qbfjold · 23/02/2021 21:35

He did. I’m afraid I ran off to the bath to sort my head out

OP posts:
KeepWashingThoseHands · 23/02/2021 21:36

Is he called Ross?

Hard to say. How long was he with her, what’s your take on how the relationship ended/is now etc. I think even if ‘innocent’ it’s fair you’re upset. Did you say anything to him about it? I would be v upset but am ‘red’ personality.

Purplealienpuke · 23/02/2021 21:36

Oh dear....
First time I'd let it go.
Did he know and apologise?
I would tell him how it made you feel and hope it didn't happen again.
Is the relationship is normally good ?

Level32 · 23/02/2021 21:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Wallywobbles · 23/02/2021 21:39

I've done it far too often. Luckily DH is very tolerant as I barely remember my own name.

Frazzled99 · 23/02/2021 21:41

Luckily for my DH me and his ex have the same name!

Holothane · 23/02/2021 21:41

My dh has done I’ve just laughed it wasn’t in the bedroom and we’re talking male here.

pictish · 23/02/2021 21:42

Easy slip up to make imo.

I get dd and the cat mixed up.

NovemberR · 23/02/2021 21:44

My MIL called me by DHs Ex Wife's name only after we were together about 15 years. She got my name right before that. She's done it several times now.

He was only married for 2 years to his first wife...(25 years ago).

tonyharrisonboosh · 23/02/2021 21:44

My fiancee did this twice in the first year of our relationship. At the time I went mad and was really hurt.

Now, having been together 8 years, I realise it was a slip of the tongue and not the harbouring of feelings for his ex. Its not nice and I know its easy for someone to say but don't worry too much. X

IReallyNeedMoreGin · 23/02/2021 21:44

I've done it a couple of times, called my 2nd DH by my first DH name. 1st H was an abusive asshole who I'm definitely not still in love with! It was just a slip of the tongue.

Honeyroar · 23/02/2021 21:46

I’ve done it loads. My mother has called every boyfriend I’ve had by their predecessor’s name. I’ve been married 14 years and I occasionally still call my husband my boyfriend.

MatildaTheCat · 23/02/2021 21:46

Try not to make a thing of it, it will only stress him and make it more likely to happen again. It’s unfortunate timing but it was YOU he was having sex with, not his ex.

Tomatobear · 23/02/2021 21:49

I regularly call the dog DH's name and vice versa!

The way he deals with it is important though. I hope he's kind to you and makes it's clear he's sorry.

BlueLikeASmurf · 23/02/2021 21:49

I wouldn't worry about it. My MIL goes through all her sister's names and their husbands before she gets to DH's name. She has done this ever since I met her back in 1984. DH is her first born son, aged 55. He finds it tiresome but he's used to it now.

CaptainCarp · 23/02/2021 21:50

Oh my! I bet he is genuinely mortified OP.

If this is a 1st & as he apologised I would try to not read too much into it.

DP has called me his ex's name once (admittedly not during sex). I think he cleaned the house after lol.
His family have also called me her name in the 1st year or 2 of us going out..
They were together for a decade & the start of our names are similar though so I let them off.

chocolatesaltyballs22 · 23/02/2021 21:52

I've called husband no2 my ex husband's name. I fucking hate my ex husband. But to be fair it was during an argument so the context was there 😂

BillieSpain · 23/02/2021 21:56

@NovemberR

My MIL called me by DHs Ex Wife's name only after we were together about 15 years. She got my name right before that. She's done it several times now.

He was only married for 2 years to his first wife...(25 years ago).

My DSil does this to me all the time. It is 100% deliberate and I genuinely find the woman pathetic. Grin

Doesn't bother me in the least.

She also used to say (when I was pregnant with DD) 'Oh my brother so wanted a boy' . Nasty.

She is a different generation though.

Scarby9 · 23/02/2021 21:56

So easily done in so many different situations.

BillieSpain · 23/02/2021 21:57

I call my DDog my DD's name ALL the time and vice versa.

NovemberR · 23/02/2021 22:01

@BillieSpain

Sounds like my ex SIL! When I married DH1 she spent the whole of our wedding day sobbing in a corner because he'd married me. She then got drunk and he had to go and comfort her in the carpark.

I don't miss either of them... Grin

SnackSizeRaisin · 23/02/2021 22:04

Awkward, but I wouldn't worry if he was apologetic. It's unlikely to mean anything.

ExtraOnions · 23/02/2021 22:08

My husband has done it a couple of times ... I laughed, it didn’t mean anything, just a slip of the tongue. I’m constantly calling my siblings by each other’s names as well ... I am terrible with names in general