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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not tell friend where I bought something.

359 replies

GardenGnomeParty · 19/02/2021 18:25

Three years ago we bought a common garden thing from a local supplier. It's gorgeous, still looks great, had lots of use and we love it.
My friend admired it but was then disappointed to be given a lovely but different one from her family. Not heard from her for ages, no presents for my DD last year for her birthday, I thought the friendship had faded.
She's now asked where we bought ours from.
I don't want to tell her.
It was expensive and I don't want local gossip.
Our version is unusual but classy and I don't want to share my 'fucking nailed it this time' style.
I have sensed 'competitive purchasing' from this 'Shopping Friend' family in the past, they do it with others and pride themselves on their great 'taste'. It's not healthy and we have distanced ourselves from them.
The examples they gave with other friends were best car, slow cooker, bell tent, dog breed, cat breed, mug manufacturer. They take great pride in their purchasing and like to buy the 'best'. It will end up all over Instagram and I'll have to listen to mutual friends tell me I've bought one just like 'Shopping Friend'

So yabu - tell her, share the joy, it's just a thing for the garden
Yanbu - keep quiet, wallow in your mid life teen cool crisis, don't share the info, you win the best garden thing prize, don't share.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
justilou1 · 19/02/2021 19:08

Tell her the manufacturer went out of business

ARoseDowntown · 19/02/2021 19:08

Wait - are you David Cameron? Is it a she’s masquerading as a writer’s hut?

ARoseDowntown · 19/02/2021 19:08

*shed

QueenOwl · 19/02/2021 19:09

I get it OP.

I actually posted a similar thread years ago and got similar replies re being petty and insecure etc but, whether or not that's a fair assessment, the situation really wound me up, so I can sympathise.

Agree with those who've suggested you tell her you can't remember.

blisstwins · 19/02/2021 19:09

way too much energy to care about....I would just tell her. Who cares.

ARoseDowntown · 19/02/2021 19:09

A water feature! A classy water feature!

I NEED TO KNOW WHAT IT IS! Could influence my vote greatly.

TheWitchersWife · 19/02/2021 19:09

I'm pretty.
I'd reply "oh, I don't remember, but it is absolutely stunning and I don't think you'll find another one like it".

So no help to her and rubbed it in a little bit too 😅

Doyoumind · 19/02/2021 19:10

I know logically it is petty not to tell but I would be equally pissed off.

I have a friend who copied my purchases a lot from childhood into adulthood. We are still in touch but much less so in middle age. If we were in touch more I don't doubt it would continue.

MarshaBradyo · 19/02/2021 19:10

Yes we need to know to advise

StCharlotte · 19/02/2021 19:11

@Everythingmagnolia

Is it a hot tub?
No. OP said it was classy.

It's a hot tub.

Givemeabreak88 · 19/02/2021 19:11

This is like my sister, anything she had no one else is allowed to buy! She’s actually banned people from using certain web sites, I take no notice of her but most of her friends “obey” her 😐

Mummyoflittledragon · 19/02/2021 19:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GardenGnomeParty · 19/02/2021 19:12

Thank you vipers, you have made me laugh.

It is so petty, it is only stuff, I think normally I'd just be flattered but it really hit a nerve!

I'm going to hit the alcohol this evening and starting adding aliens and an entire troop of personalised Gnomes to basket. I'll spot my neighbour here in a fortnight complaining about the couriers along with my garden filled with tat.

OP posts:
MichelleScarn · 19/02/2021 19:12

Wood burner pizza oven?

DontFuckItUp · 19/02/2021 19:12

Tell her it was a gift and you've no idea where it was bought

HelloThereMeHearties · 19/02/2021 19:14

@DontFuckItUp

Tell her it was a gift and you've no idea where it was bought
Ah, but then OP would have to deny that it was her own fabulous taste that obtained the item Grin
RozHuntleysStump · 19/02/2021 19:15

I’d tell her. I couldn’t care about this. So what if she shows off on sm?

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 19/02/2021 19:16

I think it is a fringed garden parasol and I want it.

Tell us-we won't tell!!!!

DavidsSchitt · 19/02/2021 19:17

Oh come on. What is it?

An ofyr?

MissBaskinIfYoureNasty · 19/02/2021 19:17

Is there such a thing as a classy garden gnome?! 😂

DavidsSchitt · 19/02/2021 19:19

And surely you just comment on her social media post with "oh so glad you finally saved up for it. Ours is going strong 3 years later. Enjoy. #twinnies"

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 19/02/2021 19:20

You should take it as a compliment IMO, that she admires your taste.
I can see that it’s bloody annoying, though.

Suzi888 · 19/02/2021 19:21

Does she not have google? Nothing is that niche that it can’t be found, unless you made it....even then someone could copy it. Hmm
What IS itGrin haha!

TrialOfStyle · 19/02/2021 19:22

@fourquenelles

Coincidence that THIS popped up on my Facebook feed just now?
Oh ffs, I want those fucking aliens now. I don’t even know why.

Probably best you don’t post what you have OP, as I suspect I am a style stealer too. (My username is purely coincidental).

Unless... is this one of those ‘draw you in’ posts, and it’s actually something you sell?

Blondiney · 19/02/2021 19:24

Petty. Who gives a shit?