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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not tell friend where I bought something.

359 replies

GardenGnomeParty · 19/02/2021 18:25

Three years ago we bought a common garden thing from a local supplier. It's gorgeous, still looks great, had lots of use and we love it.
My friend admired it but was then disappointed to be given a lovely but different one from her family. Not heard from her for ages, no presents for my DD last year for her birthday, I thought the friendship had faded.
She's now asked where we bought ours from.
I don't want to tell her.
It was expensive and I don't want local gossip.
Our version is unusual but classy and I don't want to share my 'fucking nailed it this time' style.
I have sensed 'competitive purchasing' from this 'Shopping Friend' family in the past, they do it with others and pride themselves on their great 'taste'. It's not healthy and we have distanced ourselves from them.
The examples they gave with other friends were best car, slow cooker, bell tent, dog breed, cat breed, mug manufacturer. They take great pride in their purchasing and like to buy the 'best'. It will end up all over Instagram and I'll have to listen to mutual friends tell me I've bought one just like 'Shopping Friend'

So yabu - tell her, share the joy, it's just a thing for the garden
Yanbu - keep quiet, wallow in your mid life teen cool crisis, don't share the info, you win the best garden thing prize, don't share.

OP posts:
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WorkHardPlayHard1 · 21/02/2021 16:54

@GardenGnomeParty

Thank you vipers, you have made me laugh.

It is so petty, it is only stuff, I think normally I'd just be flattered but it really hit a nerve!

I'm going to hit the alcohol this evening and starting adding aliens and an entire troop of personalised Gnomes to basket. I'll spot my neighbour here in a fortnight complaining about the couriers along with my garden filled with tat.

Am on your side!! My mums friend "befriended" me for a while. Copied my wedding dress, tiara, church, bridesmaid colour dresses, cake I designed myself with feathers, mine had 3 tiers, she had 4, same honeymoon. It dawned on me when I was at the wedding that she had copied all these things. My mouth must have dropped as mum told me to keep quiet! Some people basically rip you off as have no idea a of their own. Its a compliment to you but very annoying. You have definitely "forgotten where its from" xx
WorkHardPlayHard1 · 21/02/2021 16:55

@DavidsSchitt

And surely you just comment on her social media post with "oh so glad you finally saved up for it. Ours is going strong 3 years later. Enjoy. #twinnies"
Love this ! 😻
Ddot · 21/02/2021 17:00

Just say Ebay.

numberoneson · 21/02/2021 19:10

GardenGnomeParty I'd feel just the same as you, may be petty, but it's none of her business! Tell her you've forgotten where it came from. I can't stand people who're always wanting to "keep up with the Jones's". (especially when like you said, it includes buying "the latest fashionable" living creature. (Rant over lol)

Vivenne · 21/02/2021 22:18

Keep quiet, don't tell her.

grandageorge · 21/02/2021 23:22

Tell her Woolworths

itsureis · 21/02/2021 23:34

I'm a little like your friend. I get my friends to do all the legwork on finding things and then ask them where they got it from 😂

That said ... I wouldn't tell her. Let her find her own and keep your little gem to yourself x

1Wugbear · 22/02/2021 19:56

@PyjamaFan

I love the pettiness of this. I feel the same sometimes!

Grin

Ditto.

Most of the time I don't care, and then sometimes I do. Do what you think of on the day and if it slips your mind, then - well, you had better things to do, really.

Sciurus83 · 22/02/2021 20:46

Can't believe I've returned to this thread and OP still hasn't spilled the beans!!

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