To not tell friend where I bought something.

[GardenGnomeParty]

Three years ago we bought a common garden thing from a local supplier. It's gorgeous, still looks great, had lots of use and we love it.
My friend admired it but was then disappointed to be given a lovely but different one from her family. Not heard from her for ages, no presents for my DD last year for her birthday, I thought the friendship had faded.
She's now asked where we bought ours from.
I don't want to tell her.
It was expensive and I don't want local gossip.
Our version is unusual but classy and I don't want to share my 'fucking nailed it this time' style.
I have sensed 'competitive purchasing' from this 'Shopping Friend' family in the past, they do it with others and pride themselves on their great 'taste'. It's not healthy and we have distanced ourselves from them.
The examples they gave with other friends were best car, slow cooker, bell tent, dog breed, cat breed, mug manufacturer. They take great pride in their purchasing and like to buy the 'best'. It will end up all over Instagram and I'll have to listen to mutual friends tell me I've bought one just like 'Shopping Friend'

So yabu - tell her, share the joy, it's just a thing for the garden
Yanbu - keep quiet, wallow in your mid life teen cool crisis, don't share the info, you win the best garden thing prize, don't share.

Say it was bought on eBay. They sell new and used. Say it was 'lightly used and a real bargain from someone in Scotland who was moving abroad.

I will just add that this happened to me in college in the 90s. I had the coolest pair of orange tartan trousers (you definitely had to be there). A girl I knew asked where they were from and then appeared in them in the canteen the following week. I mean Orange Tartan Pants. Not exactly subtle.
Now I don't tell.

She has no contact etc for ages and then texts you wanting to know where you bought something from!

No "Hi how are you! Apologies I haven't been in touch" then expects you to be ok with a text out of the blue.

Some might say don't be petty. I say she only wants you when your useful. I wouldn't even bother replying.

She is not a friend. A casual acquaintance and that's it. For me this isn't about what she has asked about. Its about her has a person.

I knew someone like this once. I finally got rid

Wow so petty

Grow up. Grow uuuuup

Also here for the pettiness. I’d also not tell said person unless it was in person and it comes out like word vomit 😅 if it’s text ignore them and enjoy the satisfaction of your stuff being better 😂😂 so petty but I love it

Is it a hand-tooled sex swing?

I totally understand where you’re coming from. Just say you don’t remember and hope she actually finds some style of her own! Or just post loads of pics of whatever it is and post it all over Instagram ;)

Share on social first and then share the post with her, that way she would be known to be copying from you 😉 all your friends will be saying you got the same as "gardengnomeparty" lol

No don’t tell her just tell her you got of some random internet site snd can’t for life of you remember. Yes it’s petty but I’ve had the same fir years but slightly different over clothes I like designer and then clothes obsessed friend whinge how it’s ridiculous to spend that and hers is the same from primark. Except it wasn’t or she wouldn’t be that bothered. It drive her insane if she couldn’t recognise it. I just said oh small boutique on holiday occasionally. Sometimes you just have to let your inself pettiness have a day xxx

Well done. You must not tell. Ever. Not even if she gets you drunk.

YANBU. You have no reason to play along with her silly games.

It’s got to be bar, surely?! I would simply text, “Don’t be a copycat! Not telling, as it’s special!! Hope you’re well & staying safe xxx”

I knew someone who was like that about my garden arch. We ended up as arch enemies

I so want to know what it is. I'm betting fire pit.

You sound like the type of female who will never you where she got her dress from in case it looks better on you then you ... don't be that girl !!she's not nice

Please say Gumtree :-)

I really, really want a lawn hippo now.

Duck house
Pagoda
Wicker giraffe
Life-sized terracotta soldier
1970's stylee fringed orange and white striped swing seat
Beach hut
3 tons of gravel

I bet it's one of those dodgy Hawaiian huts that cost 60k at Kent show

@mummybearhug

Grow up

I wouldn’t have said it quite this strongly myself, but you do seem rather preoccupied with what others have, if it is better than yours etc. As a grown woman, should you really be taking up your headspace with who puts what on Instagram?

Is it a hot tub/sex pond? Or a garden sofa?

It's a large drinking bird.
Nailed it style!

Was it this? www.etsy.com/uk/listing/76640755/zombie-gnomes-bye-bye-birdie?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=zombie+garden+gnomes&ref=sr_gallery-1-7&from_market_listing_grid_organic=1

or this? www.amazon.co.uk/Penguin-Bollard/dp/B00NP0O0OE?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

You have my sympathies, OP, because a family friend was like this & it drove a couple of us nuts. Whatever we got, she'd go off & buy the same & then say, "Look! I've got one just like you!" & expect us to be thrilled. It gets old pretty fast.

I reckon people who are sniping at you have never had to endure this.