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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Congratulations to Meghan and Harry - baby no.2 on the way!

416 replies

bluewanda · 14/02/2021 22:13

Lovely news, congrats to them both!

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9259925/Meghan-Markle-pregnant-Duchess-confirms-Prince-Harry-expecting-baby.html

OP posts:
StoneofDestiny · 19/02/2021 21:05

and selling access to Andrew

Yes - and Sophie did exactly the same thing, selling access to the royals.

Lookingforwardto2021 · 19/02/2021 21:05

Good to hear about Netflix. I was going to cancel or subscription, but will hold off.

Btw, any other thing that gets me is this term ‘working’ royal. What a coup. Pretend that they are working when they mostly do nothing of real value

RickiTarr · 19/02/2021 21:08

Yes so do I. It wasn’t until all this Bridgerton buzz that I realised she did Scandal, which was one of my favourites.

RickiTarr · 19/02/2021 21:08

Sorry that was to @TheKeatingFive

TheKeatingFive · 19/02/2021 21:17

I loved Scandal and also HTGAWM.

But then my user name says it all, I guess Grin

Beseigedbykillersquirrels · 19/02/2021 21:22

@Lookingforwardto2021

Good to hear about Netflix. I was going to cancel or subscription, but will hold off.

Btw, any other thing that gets me is this term ‘working’ royal. What a coup. Pretend that they are working when they mostly do nothing of real value

I completely agree with you. However... Do you think it's that great, being royal? I personally can't imagine it's so desirable. Being photographed constantly so feeling you need to always look your best, not being able to live your life as your own, the weird assumption that your children are somehow public property needing a protection officer at school and anywhere they go, not having normal play dates, sleepovers, parties, etc. Every detail of your life under scrutiny, people from your past selling stories, your parents' and siblings' lives dissected and reported (if you married in), knowing you, and more importantly, your children, are at risk from a crazed anti-royalist every time you step out of the door, being held to such strict codes of conduct, every outfit under scrutiny, etc. I couldn't live like that and I certainly wouldn't want my children to live like that. I really don't think being royal is anything to envy. There are plenty of wealthier people whose lives are their own. Money isn't everything, I wouldn't want that life for a few million.
StartupRepair · 19/02/2021 21:29

Nice to hear that about Netflix.
I think it's sad that Harry and Meghan are basically cut off from family on all sides. Apart from Meghan's mother, there is no one else.

Butteredtoast55 · 19/02/2021 21:44

In response to some posters, just because I feel uncomfortable with their timing and their choices to exploit their profile by getting someone to effectively ghost write their perspective, create a guffy website and podcast and stage manage their lives doesn't mean I am a 'hater' I was really delighted for them when they married and I still hope they are really happy and find whatever it is they want to be contented and purposeful in their lives.

Oldbutstillgotit · 19/02/2021 22:10

@ Butteredtoast55
I agree with you . Unfortunately on MN and other sites if you dare to criticise H and M you are considered a hater .
I was so happy when H met M although I didn’t like her being referred to as a breath of fresh air as I am old enough to remember previous women in the RF referred to as such ....
The engagement interview caused me to hesitate but I still sat and enjoyed the wedding however the Africa interview was - in my opinion- tone deaf and made me very uncomfortable.
Today’s announcement from HM was inevitable and I do think the response from H and M was petulant and unnecessary:
I have no idea what the interview with OW will cover but previous RF interviews have not gone too well .

GoLightlyontheEarth · 19/02/2021 22:14

I think the life of a Royal is hell. However M chose that life as a mature woman. She agreed to marry into it and should have known what to expect. Harry certainly did.

TheKeatingFive · 19/02/2021 23:25

She agreed to marry into it and should have known what to expect.

I find this an utterly bizarre position.

How would anyone know ‘what to expect’ when marrying in to an institution like this one?

Oldbutstillgotit · 19/02/2021 23:35

She could have read some books , newspaper articles , watched TV interviews and asked people ??

TheKeatingFive · 20/02/2021 02:32

She could have read some books , newspaper articles , watched TV interviews and asked people ??

None of those would give the slightest indication what the actual lived experience of being a member of the RF is like. I’m astonished you think they would.

PinkyParrot · 20/02/2021 07:19

She could have read some books , newspaper articles , watched TV interviews and asked people

The lack of insight and comprehension and imagination in posters on these threads leaves me dumbfounded.
I can only think it is feigned so that posters can then go onto sneer, critticise with fake anger and shock at the victim.
No one can expect the behaviour of SM and the press as no one imagines other people/ strangers would get any fun or satisfaction from being spiteful and nasty about someone they've never met or have a hope in hell of ever meeting in real life.
But there you go - women in particular are there to be maligned, criticised as cruelly as they can manage. I don't need to start a list as there are so many of them.
There's something not right in the characters of the very many posters / journos who gleefully do this.

Oldbutstillgotit · 20/02/2021 08:01

TheKeatingFive

She could have read some books , newspaper articles , watched TV interviews and asked people ??

None of those would give the slightest indication what the actual lived experience of being a member of the RF is like. I’m astonished you think they would.

And I am astonished that you think it wouldn’t but if it makes you feel superior to come out with that comment , I will leave it here .

GoLightlyontheEarth · 20/02/2021 08:32

@TheKeatingFive

She agreed to marry into it and should have known what to expect.

I find this an utterly bizarre position.

How would anyone know ‘what to expect’ when marrying in to an institution like this one?

Because she was marrying a member of that family, and so he had first hand knowledge of what it’s like. The many books on DIana and documentaries . What happened with Sarah Ferguson. Apparently neither of Harry’s previous girlfriends wanted the role for this reason. She should at least have expected the media to be challenging , and the restrictions and rules hard to negotiate. Every member of the public knows that being in the RF is very very different from being a ‘commoner’. Public perception is a finely balanced thing and can turn in an instant. As an actress, she must have known this. She wasn’t a 19 year old ingenue, she was in her late thirties with a lot of life experience.
PinkyParrot · 20/02/2021 08:36

Public perception is a finely balanced thing and can turn in an instant
Or people can just be plain cruel from the start

GoLightlyontheEarth · 20/02/2021 08:51

They weren’t plain cruel. Most people were overjoyed for Harry and wished him well. Me included.

RickiTarr · 20/02/2021 10:14

@GoLightlyontheEarth

They weren’t plain cruel. Most people were overjoyed for Harry and wished him well. Me included.
I think a lot of us were extra excited to see multicultural society finally reflected in the senior BRF, or in the case of us republicans just slightly pleased when normally we would swerve royal stuff.

So in fact, she had considerably more goodwill that most royal brides (as well as some hate from the back). She appealed to a much broader demographic than most girls in pearls marrying princes.

Maybe that gave her further to fall, but it also meant she would have got a lot of leeway to do things differently. All she had to do was stay in the country, do the job she had accepted and ignore the haters. The vast majority were on her side.

I know it made me really disappointed that the modern, mixed race, self made royal of partially African descent stood in Africa and whinged that her diamond shoes were too tight. On a tour on which they’d been meeting all kinds of underprivileged people. But she was complaining to camera that not enough people had asked if she was okay, and saying “it’s not enough to survive, you have thrive”. Instead of “shining a light” on the problems in AFRICA. I felt dismayed by that. I suspect some of her ancestors would too.

I dunno. It’s just all very disappointing.

HeadNorth · 20/02/2021 10:18

What is disappointng is that the bunch of lazy, self-serving grifters she married into failed to support her and her husband. Mind you, any sensible woman would go low/no contact with inlaws like that - racist Phil, controlling Liz who pals around with dictators, pervy Andy. Yuck.

RickiTarr · 20/02/2021 10:26

@HeadNorth

What is disappointng is that the bunch of lazy, self-serving grifters she married into failed to support her and her husband. Mind you, any sensible woman would go low/no contact with inlaws like that - racist Phil, controlling Liz who pals around with dictators, pervy Andy. Yuck.
She wasn’t going to go low contact with FIL when he was paying them £23 million per year as an allowance to top up their joint fortune, though was she? It’s been said he continues to pay that after their move to LA. He might be paying it now. Granny gave them two bits of prime real estate to live in.

I can’t see what further “support” two thirty somethings need that they can’t buy in or work out for themselves. She wasn’t some girl from Brixton struggling to get internships like the rest of us had to. She was set. She just had to write her own ending and stop reading the tabloids.

GetOffYourHighHorse · 20/02/2021 10:34

'So in fact, she had considerably more goodwill that most royal brides (as well as some hate from the back). She appealed to a much broader demographic than most girls in pearls marrying princes.'

Yes, myself and many others had hoped they would drag the RF into the 21st century. They seemed so positive about their roles.

'I know it made me really disappointed that the modern, mixed race, self made royal of partially African descent stood in Africa and whinged that her diamond shoes were too tight. On a tour on which they’d been meeting all kinds of underprivileged people'

Yes this is what actually happened. They couldn't ignore the criticism like every other royal has before them and instead have acted like a pair or over privileged, over sensitive egotistical attention seekers. It's not a good look.

HeadNorth · 20/02/2021 13:29

I can’t see what further “support” two thirty somethings need that they can’t buy in or work out for themselves. She wasn’t some girl from Brixton struggling to get internships like the rest of us had to. She was set. She just had to write her own ending and stop reading the tabloids.

Maybe taking a stand against the racist villification in the press? Granny was awfully quiet on that subject - mind you she is married to Phil, so is presumably cool with casual racism.

GoLightlyontheEarth · 20/02/2021 16:11

The Queen never comments on the Press. If she started that it would be never ending. Never complain, never explain I think is her motto.

HeadNorth · 20/02/2021 16:19

Never upset the gravy train is her motto more like. She did plenty of compaining when she thought she might have to pay more tax, greedy woman.