Who should get this money

[TheresNothingIWantMore]

OK, I'm going to try to write this as even handedly as I can - light hearted as we've come to an agreement but want to see what others think.

I'm one of a couple with 2 children who are signed to a model agency. When they were signed up we agreed all money earned by the children would be theirs and set up a separate account.

One of the boys recently had 2 days of filming, and on top of their pay there is £150 chaperone payment as the child has to be accompanied at all times. Usually they hire someone for this but due to covid they're minimising people so pay the parents instead.

Parent A thinks they should have the money as they were the chaperone, parent B thinks it should go to the children as its part of the pay for the job.

Some details to avoid drip feeding, sorry if it makes it a long post!

Parent A would have been going anyway, didn't expect payment and had a good time. They had to use a days holiday (usually holiday days are precious but maybe not so much this year with covid) Travel and food were covered so they weren't out of pocket. They have no specific plan for the money if they have it. Apart from this money we have no savings for the childrens future.

I'd say our financial situation is OK, we don't struggle to pay the bills each month but there's not lots left after that so apart from a takeaway and a few drinks on a Friday there aren't many treats. Parents rarely spend money on themselves.

Both parent have read and approved this post!

If there was no covid and a chaperone was there then the kid wouldnt get it so therefore it's not paid to the child and the parent should have it. Personally, we would likely use it to treat the whole family to something. A new board game to play and a new food delivery from a restaurant.

You are B aren't you??

I think it should be split between you both. B does all the hard work and A cant then reap the rewards

Speaking as someone who spent over 10 years of their life doing similar and had to put their own life on hold because of it, the chaperone should have it. Partly because they have earned it - they were being paid instead of the official chaperone - and partly to recompense for the time, effort, petrol money, form-filling and everything else that goes with the job of being a parent with a dc who does this sort of thing.

Only read the first page.
But since the child is being paid and the money isn't being taken off him and all other expenses covered then the chaperone should have the money .
But If I was the chaperone . I would treat me and dh to a night out or something they both can enjoy .

Obviously the parent.

Money goes to the chaperone, but would be family money in reality here.

Personally I'd put it in the other childs bank account, the one who didn't get the job.

My daughter did a film and she has her money and I has the chaperone fee.
X

Treat the family

I can see you've come to a conclusion on this but my feeling is that the two of you parents should share the money: either split it or spend it on something nice for yourselves (jointly)

@TheresNothingIWantMore

Posters are correct that B was at home looking after DS2

B is the one that does all the organising, dealing with the agency, organising head shots, did the communication on the build up to the shoot etc so has put in more work in overall than A into the childrens "career"

This is the most important bit and would have changed everyone's responses. It should have been split between both parents but going in the kids account is fair.

Family money.

@Kendodd

Personally I'd put it in the other childs bank account, the one who didn't get the job.

And how do you square that when this shit storm ends and the private chaperones start to be paid again? "Sorry darling, I know you have £££ less than your sister but she gets more work than you and I cant pay you the money I got for looking after her?" Or "Yes I paid your sister £££ in my chaperone fees because you got more work than her, so yes....you earned your money and I gave her most of hers"

Each kid earns their own money otherwise you are just going to foster bad relations later on. They may not get it now but when they are older they will understand that if there is a disparity in their savings then its not your doing.

There’s no right or wrong answer it’s a matter of opinion, personally I would give to child based on the fact you wouldn’t be there if it wasn’t for child.

Chaperone keeps the money.

Shared between parents or family treat money

Chaperone keeps it

I’d put it into an account for my child. However if you’re skint and need it then take it and spend it. If you’re not then don’t.

You A seems really miffed at doing all the hard work and organising, and B getting a fun day out, free food, all expenses paid and £150 to boot too

Parent A would have been going anyway, didn't expect payment and had a good time.

So it's a complete bonus. If you really can't agree, give it to charity instead!

Sorry - got my As and Bs mixed up!

So without B organising and A accompanying the child would not have had the filming opportunity? If so A and B should share the chaperone fee, maybe using it for a family treat would be a great solution.. If very flush then it could be put into the child’s account.

50/50 split since B does all the leg work.

@TheresNothingIWantMore

Posters are correct that B was at home looking after DS2

B is the one that does all the organising, dealing with the agency, organising head shots, did the communication on the build up to the shoot etc so has put in more work in overall than A into the childrens "career"

Yeah, that kinda changes things! How did you decide who went and why is it that B does all the organising etc? I’m now thinking a split between A and B (not sure if 50/50, depends on more info) or an agreement to treat yourselves as a couple (or family, if you prefer)

Parent B is wrong. The pay is for the chaperone. The parents should spend it on themselves if they don't often indulge themselves. £50 each and £50 for a really good takeaway - nearest thing we have to a night out these days.