Who should get this money

[TheresNothingIWantMore]

OK, I'm going to try to write this as even handedly as I can - light hearted as we've come to an agreement but want to see what others think.

I'm one of a couple with 2 children who are signed to a model agency. When they were signed up we agreed all money earned by the children would be theirs and set up a separate account.

One of the boys recently had 2 days of filming, and on top of their pay there is £150 chaperone payment as the child has to be accompanied at all times. Usually they hire someone for this but due to covid they're minimising people so pay the parents instead.

Parent A thinks they should have the money as they were the chaperone, parent B thinks it should go to the children as its part of the pay for the job.

Some details to avoid drip feeding, sorry if it makes it a long post!

Parent A would have been going anyway, didn't expect payment and had a good time. They had to use a days holiday (usually holiday days are precious but maybe not so much this year with covid) Travel and food were covered so they weren't out of pocket. They have no specific plan for the money if they have it. Apart from this money we have no savings for the childrens future.

I'd say our financial situation is OK, we don't struggle to pay the bills each month but there's not lots left after that so apart from a takeaway and a few drinks on a Friday there aren't many treats. Parents rarely spend money on themselves.

Both parent have read and approved this post!

"This is a very Good point. In normal times it wouldn't have even been a discussion the private Chaperone would have been paid. Parent A was the Chaperone."

For some reason the site wouldn't let me quote this properly, but Bs answer is that A would have still been there all day anyway along with the chaperone, so no real difference.

Also B wants it pointed out all our finances are shared, so it's not like A has their own "pot" it's coming out of.

We have decided to put it in the account, but if A had something specific they had wanted to buy B would have been OK with it.

Just to reiterate by the way this is lighthearted, there wasn't a major row going on just wanted some other opinions

A feels vindicated though!

I think it really depends on how much money you have. If 150 is very little to you save it for the children. But if would mean a lot then the parent should possibly have it and spend it on something for you both. Like a nice meal out when you can.

It would depend on the family finances and set up, and the reasons why parent A was the chaperone and not parent B.

If either parent could have gone/was willing to go and it was just luck of the draw, then parents spend the money together. As PP days presumably parent B had to stay home and look after the other child, not go off on a jolly whilst parent A ‘worked’.

In our house earnings are pretty much all family money anyway (we have equal spending money) and so any extra would go in the pot.

The important question is which are you op?

Family day out fund? That's what happens with unexpected cash here...

I'm going against the grain and would put it into the child's account. If the child hadn't been working then the parent wouldn't have been needed to chaperone.

Did the other parent stay at home to look after the other child? If so, did they get paid a childcare fee for this?

I think it should either be family money, or split between both children's savings.

I'd have put it in the family pot and used it for a family treat. Unless you needed it towards a bill or wanted to add it to a rainy day, emergency fund then you should have just used the money to do something that would cheer you all up.

Posters are correct that B was at home looking after DS2

B is the one that does all the organising, dealing with the agency, organising head shots, did the communication on the build up to the shoot etc so has put in more work in overall than A into the childrens "career"

If the parents are still married, Id want it spent on the parents as a couple. Like a nice restaurant meal.

I'd put it in the kids account.

@londongirl12

I would spend it on something for both parents. Not just for one of them.

^what I would do.

@TheresNothingIWantMore

Posters are correct that B was at home looking after DS2

B is the one that does all the organising, dealing with the agency, organising head shots, did the communication on the build up to the shoot etc so has put in more work in overall than A into the childrens "career"

In that case B should pay A £25 for his services and keep the rest

The chaperone

As an aside do you save money for the children equally or if one is more successful at modelling will they be richer than their sibling?

Given that both parents facilitated the shoot, they should get £75 each. But I dont think that B's idea that the child should get it is fair on either parent, or indeed, the other kid.

As a parent I would use some of the money to cover the travel expenses, but everything else, as it's being earned off of the back of using my child for.money making, the kid gets the money that they earned. I remember being 7, and I drew some art for a competition for the local paper. I won. But my babysitter, who told me to draw for the competition, kept the prize and the prize money for herself - looking back, I would understand if she'd kept the postage fees etc, but keeping EVERYTHING for herself?? When I was the one to win that prize? No.

Chaperone keeps the money.

Parents should split it and both buy themselves something nice.

@YouJustDoYou

As a parent I would use some of the money to cover the travel expenses, but everything else, as it's being earned off of the back of using my child for.money making, the kid gets the money that they earned. I remember being 7, and I drew some art for a competition for the local paper. I won. But my babysitter, who told me to draw for the competition, kept the prize and the prize money for herself - looking back, I would understand if she'd kept the postage fees etc, but keeping EVERYTHING for herself?? When I was the one to win that prize? No.

Using my child for money making

Bit harsh. The children are getting their money for their work, the OP stated that in the first post.

The argument is whether the chaperone fee usually paid to a seperate person should also be paid to the child/ren and not the parent who actually did the chaperoning.

In our house I am Both organiser and chaperone. I also pay for all the dance lessons, shoes, clothing, travel etc.

So i would have kept the money and never mentioned it to DH

With this new info that parent B looked after DC2, I would split it 50/50, so 75 quid each.

It's not the child's.

The person doing the chaperoning spent their time on it, right? And this payment is to recompense the chaperone for exactly that?

Chaperone takes the £!

The chaperone should have it. Anything else would be really grabby and embarrassing.

The chaperone parent should get it, but could maybe give £50 to the non-chaperone parent if cash is usually tight so both can have a chance to treat themselves.