Is being shy something that needs to be changed?

[Daydreamermummy]

I've just had my teenagers school report. Its all good. No complaints from subject teachers. His form tutor has only concentrated on him being quiet. Fair enough, he is quiet, so am I. I think she has pushed it too far by saying she is still hoping that she can change this. She said therefore she will be asking him more questions in PSCHE. My older children are all quiet, all hold down jobs etc. AIBU to think that you can't just change someone to not be shy and that it isn't always a negative thing?

Unless it's a problem in general rhats an issue affecting all areas of their life, it's not a negative thing. I was terribly quiet & shy & it really affected me socially & at work. Socially people deemed me stand offish. Work wise & re interviews feedback etc I got told "you're so quiet the loud ones will walk all over you" ( which they did). Temping knocked it out of me. I'm still an introvert but I can get by socially & workwise now. I'm more confident too & with people I know, quite social. My shyness was due to low self esteem & emotional abuse. But, avoidance did make my quietness & shyness worse, pushing myself did help..

Shyness can be a handicap in life. Being "quiet" is not the same thing. In school I think being quiet translates to not speaking up when you have an opinion, or not joining in group discussions… aka "participating" in class.