It's a Parking One

[ILoveFlumps]

Ok mumsnetters I need some ideas.
I popped out for 10 minutes this morning and come home to a random car on my driveway (outside my house). This is private property and allocated parking for a New Build. The Main Street it's off is permit parking only - this car has a permit.
The only place I can park is blocking it in causing a semi obstruction which I've done.
Police won't help as a civil matter.
Note has been left on the car by me telling them it's private property.
What else can I do?! Immediate neighbours have no idea whose car this is.

he knew full well it was a driveway! It was a convenient, off road parking space.
Glad you didn't go crazy but I'm sure he wont try parking on someone elses driveway again.

I can't imagine ever even considering it an option to park on someones driveway. So weird.

@Needsmustnow

Oh god, I think that's awful that you said that to him and humiliated him in that way. So much for Key Workers.

I have full respect for Key Workers. But just because he was one, doesn't give him Carte Blanche to be a dick.

@Taylrse

He probably thought that the home owner was out for the day so would park there without anyone knowing!

Yeah, maybe he does this a lot and it's the first time he's been caught?

However, while there's no excuse, in this sort of situation, I do worry that there was some type of emergency. The OP says the young man was a carer, so maybe the person he was visiting was ill or had another problem and his visit took longer than normal and it wasn't appropriate for him to leave them to move his car?

I remember reading about someone who came home to find a car parked on their front lawn and they unsurprisingly got all angry, but it turns out it was an emergency doctor, who couldn't find anywhere else to park when they were visiting someone who could have needed urgent treatment.

But it sounds like you handled it well OP and the offender won't do it in future. Although if he had a permit to park on the road and he didn't, that sounds odd .

I hope the OP is being very leisurely with getting ready

Yes!!!

needs ... really????? Being a key worker doesn’t give him the right to park ON SOMEONE ELSE’S drive! It really doesn’t! Imagine if all doctors, nurses, doctors, paramedics etc rocked up and parked on residents driveways? ... would that be acceptable?? ...

Him being a carer makes sense. They park like total dickheads around here too, and if you go out and tell them what a parking dickhead they are, they give you an earful about being a carer so they have special rules and park on any property the need to in order to do their job.

Being a carer must be hard when parking is limited, but you can block the drive of the house you are visiting, or have a quick chat with the neighbouring houses to find out where you can leave your car or something. You cant just park on someone else's drive.

👏👏👏👏👏

But it sounds like you handled it well OP and the offender won't do it in future. Although if he had a permit to park on the road and he didn't, that sounds odd

Upon inspection the road was busy and parking limited, which is why I suspect he parked here (and didn't bother trying a neighbouring road for a space)

@Needsmustnow the idiot parking guy may be a key worker but he had no idea of OP's circumstances.
She could have been expecting her own carer to turn up.
She could have been a key worker who was returning from a night shift!

While I think you handled it perfectly, I do have a bit of sympathy for him.

A lot of agencies don’t pay Carers for their travelling time, and don’t leave enough time between visits. So if he’d had to spend too much time driving around looking for a space he’d be earning less and be in trouble for lateness.

It was a dick move to park on a drive but I was shocked when I found that out about the job.

I have full respect for Key Workers. But just because he was one, doesn't give him Carte Blanche to be a dick.

No, I agree. I just think that being a carer is such a tough job, poor pay, unrealistic timings... and then to get your car back you have to say, "I won't park like a tit again" is just unnecessarily humiliating. This would really upset me.

Set the alarm off and see who comes running 😂

Being a carer doesn't give you the right to park on someone elses property.

If it had been an emergency then he very easily could have said, really sorry, my patient had fallen, it was an emergency and I didn't have time to find a more convenient place, and OP would have moved. Not like she keyed his car.

Same for midwives and emergency doctors but they should have a sign in their car that they're tending to an emergency anyway.

Lack of parking threads is the worst thing to come out of this pandemic.

I think your exchange with him was perfect. Being a carer doesn't mean he can dump his car where he likes, especially for such a long call. MILs carers are always very aware of where they park so as not to cause an inconvenience to anyone.

That conversation has me cringing inside out.

@Needsmustnow

I have full respect for Key Workers. But just because he was one, doesn't give him Carte Blanche to be a dick.

No, I agree. I just think that being a carer is such a tough job, poor pay, unrealistic timings... and then to get your car back you have to say, "I won't park like a tit again" is just unnecessarily humiliating. This would really upset me.

You know how to avoid the humiliation?

By not doing something that would make you feel humiliated if called out on.

@Needsmustnow

Oh god, I think that's awful that you said that to him and humiliated him in that way. So much for Key Workers.

Being a key worker doesn’t give him automatic right to be an idiot. And how do you even know he was a key worker, everyone can work out if the home if they can’t wfh.

@Godimabitch

Being a carer doesn't give you the right to park on someone elses property.

If it had been an emergency then he very easily could have said, really sorry, my patient had fallen, it was an emergency and I didn't have time to find a more convenient place, and OP would have moved. Not like she keyed his car.

Same for midwives and emergency doctors but they should have a sign in their car that they're tending to an emergency anyway.

Absolutely this.

If it had been an emergency situation I absolutely would have been understanding and moved with no hesitation.
It wasn't though. He knew he shouldn't park there but chose to anyway. I wasn't rude to him, I didn't shout at him but I wanted to make sure he knew it wasn't ok and hopefully he doesn't inconvenience other people with his parking in future.

@Cloudsurfing Op said Can see his badge and uniform - he’s a carer

@ILoveFlumps

Ok, so the conversation went like this: Me: (opens door) I assume that’s your car that’s parked on my drive? Him: Err yeah, I’m really sorry Me: But it’s my drive? Him: yeah, I’m sorry Me: but this is private property? Him: yeah, err, I was in a rush and I didn’t realise Me: you didn’t realise it was a drive? I don’t understand. You had to pull off the main road. It’s outside my house. You can see my neighbours have a car parked outside their house, and you can see the signs? Him: I thought you were at work and I wasn’t going to be long Me: Two hours is a long time (glares at him) Him: (Silence) Me: So for future reference, what do you think I should do so this doesn’t happen again? You clearly didn’t realise it was a private drive, so what improvements can I make to stop other people doing it? What would have deterred you? Him: Err.......I dunno Me: Should I perhaps put more signs up? Or maybe paint the drive a different colour? Him: (Silence) then he says: look I’m really sorry, would you mind moving so I can get on to my next job? Me: It would be very inconvenient if you were late wouldn’t it? Do your employers know you’re parking on private property? (Can see his badge and uniform - he’s a carer) Him: I dunno what else to say Me: How about you say you’ll never park like a tit again? Him: Ok. I won’t. Me: Won’t what? Him: Park like a tit again Me: That would be great. I’d hate for your work to know you park like an inconsiderate arsehole

I then got into my car and reversed onto the road and he drove off.
Might not have had the explosive ending MN wants, but I felt satisfied and quite smug with myself

Excellent outcome, well done OP! I love that you made him admit he parked like a tit

'Bad car' this made me lol x

Being a key worker doesn’t give him automatic right to be an idiot. And how do you even know he was a key worker, everyone can work out if the home if they can’t wfh.

Sorry, I was classifying carers on home visits as key workers.

I agree he was wrong to park on the driveway. I also think he's visiting a vulnerable person to get them out of bed, bathed, toileted, breakfasted etc. and he's doing this on minimum wage and has nowhere to park.
I'm happy to accept that I'm the only one who feels it was unnecessary, but I just think we all have struggles, we all make mistakes and there's no need to humiliate someone.

needs ... being a carer is tough etc, but it’s his choice as a job. Being a carer does not entitle him to park like a twat. Personally, I respect him fir being a carer, but i do not respect him for thinking it’s ok to do what he did.

The scenario/comments may upset you ... parking like that would upset and anger me if I was the homeowner. Like a pp said, he had no clue about the life or needs of the drive he parked on ... Respect is something I imagine he has given the nature of his job, so why show such utter disrespect for someone else?

@Needsmustnow

Oh god, I think that's awful that you said that to him and humiliated him in that way. So much for Key Workers.

Are you normally such a wet lettuce? Are you the infamous poster that would offer a person who was rude to you a creme egg?!

Well done OP. Hopefully he won’t do it again - tbh he’s lucky you don’t call his employer to make a complaint (which I do agree would be a bit much in this instance).