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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask about your fav Mumsnet cliches

811 replies

HeidiHaughton · 06/02/2021 15:29

Ltb being mine.

OP posts:
Bluesheep8 · 10/02/2021 11:27

"I literally just spat my drink everywhere"

No, no you didn't.

NuniaBeeswax · 10/02/2021 11:36

"And banging wistfully on about how many drugs you ingested during the 90s. “We were all doing it daaring. You just have had a very boring and sheltered time in your 20s.” Tinkly little laugh."

They wouldn't dream of touching alcohol though apart from licking the cap off the Bailey's bottle at Christmas because that would make them a raging alcoholic.

SparkysMagicPiano · 10/02/2021 11:40

@Bluesheep8

"I literally just spat my drink everywhere"

No, no you didn't.

I've just read exactly this on another thread.

Absolutely didn't happen.

Iknowwhatudidlastsummer · 10/02/2021 11:42

You are a "cool wife" if you have a normal relationship and are not in a constant war with your partner trying to score points over anything and everything.

You are lying and abused if you are happy in a live-in relationship as sharing a home with someone must mean losing your freedom, independence, happiness, right to watch tv or meet with friends or just have a life.

I think posters don't see the irony and the link between the 2 Grin

5128gap · 10/02/2021 11:46

He's shown you who he is, believe him.
Ask someone you trust to explain it to you.
He sounds VILE!
I'm embarrassed for you
Leggings are not trousers!!!
You can ALWAYS tell when someone has had botox
Tell him to get off the x box and parent his child
DD is very strong willed
DD 15 is absolutely stunning
I'm an hour glass with a TINY waist

Iknowwhatudidlastsummer · 10/02/2021 11:56

Leggings are not trousers!!!
well, they are leggings...

5128gap · 10/02/2021 12:21

@Iknowwhatudidlastsummer

Leggings are not trousers!!! well, they are leggings...
Indeed. After having read this many times on MN, I now know this to be true. Before, I used to think they were high waist wide leg linen trousers. Only tighter and made of lycra.
CatalinaCasesolver · 10/02/2021 12:22

All of these are fucking bang on and hilarious 😂

I'll add:

Ddog
Dcat
Drabbit
Etc etc

NuniaBeeswax · 10/02/2021 12:30

"DD 15 is absolutely stunning"

You forgot tall, slim, long golden hair, sparkling blue eyes and oh so humble...

5128gap · 10/02/2021 12:37

@NuniaBeeswax

"DD 15 is absolutely stunning"

You forgot tall, slim, long golden hair, sparkling blue eyes and oh so humble...

And SHE says that NO ONE wears that thing you've just bought anymore.
NuniaBeeswax · 10/02/2021 12:48

I'll never forgot one of the many tattoo bashing threads where someone's "trendy North London teens" apparently said that tattoos are "naff". I cried myself to sleep thar night. 😢

5128gap · 10/02/2021 13:13

@NuniaBeeswax

I'll never forgot one of the many tattoo bashing threads where someone's "trendy North London teens" apparently said that tattoos are "naff". I cried myself to sleep thar night. 😢
Well I'm sure it 'saddened' a few posters that people 'felt the need' to have tattoos too...Grin
GreenlandTheMovie · 10/02/2021 13:15

"Give your head a wobble".

But yesterday I was informed that something I written was "duly noted" and that is now my all time favourite. I've actually been sniggering with my friend on the phone saying "duly noted" rather a lot. Laughs are rather short in lockdown but this is a good one.

NuniaBeeswax · 10/02/2021 13:19

"Well I'm sure it 'saddened' a few posters that people 'felt the need' to have tattoos too...grin"

I will also never be employable because I have one easily covered tattoo on the inside of my wrist.

I better let my employer know.

LucasLeesEyebrows · 10/02/2021 13:36

@NuniaBeeswax

"DD 15 is absolutely stunning"

You forgot tall, slim, long golden hair, sparkling blue eyes and oh so humble...

She's currently looking at Universities (RG!)
5128gap · 10/02/2021 13:45

I do wish DS would consider university, but he lacks motivation. I think it comes from being 6'2 and effortlessly slim and athletic, despite eating 8 huge meals a day.

Zenithbear · 10/02/2021 13:51

Poor you on a salary of £50k a year.
It's rather pathetic and you should have worked harder at school or chose a different degree, you fool. How on earth do you manage, I was earning double that at 22.
Okay then....

5128gap · 10/02/2021 14:03

@Zenithbear

Poor you on a salary of £50k a year. It's rather pathetic and you should have worked harder at school or chose a different degree, you fool. How on earth do you manage, I was earning double that at 22. Okay then....
You should retrain! I got a masters from oxbridge while parenting my naturally beautiful DD and athletic DS, and now have a very comfortable income ( I can't say too much as its outing, but think north of six figures) plus a teeny tiny waist and a DS who is tall.
KarensChoppyBob · 10/02/2021 14:35

MNers are obsessed with blonde hair for some reason .

KarensChoppyBob · 10/02/2021 14:38

My DC are tall though, not a stealth boast, not a clue why it has to be mentioned really.

Except that when they bend down to kiss me I feel ever so slightly patronised.

GreenlandTheMovie · 10/02/2021 14:42

Oh, someone describing their newborn DC as "a long and lean x pounds".

Its a baby, not a supermodel.

Iknowwhatudidlastsummer · 10/02/2021 14:58

Any poster starting a thread is NEVER wrong on MN. Never.

They are identified in real life and the thread disappears Grin

5128gap · 10/02/2021 14:58

@KarensChoppyBob

My DC are tall though, not a stealth boast, not a clue why it has to be mentioned really.

Except that when they bend down to kiss me I feel ever so slightly patronised.

Well you're the parent maybe you just need to step up. SorryGrin
KarensChoppyBob · 10/02/2021 15:00

Definitely need a step of some sort ;) or ridiculously high heels - which DD reliably informs me No One wears anymore.

NeverDropYourMoonCup · 10/02/2021 15:06

@GreenlandTheMovie

Oh, someone describing their newborn DC as "a long and lean x pounds".

Its a baby, not a supermodel.

In the real world, that gets described as 'No wonder I was the size of a fucking house and got stuck in the PIL's downstairs toilet between the door and the washbasin at 39 weeks - she was 9lb 11oz and the length of a bloody three month old.'