To ask about your fav Mumsnet cliches

[HeidiHaughton]

Ltb being mine.

NC

‘Narc’

A chicken can feed a family of 4 for a week.

Dogs HAVE to be walked on a lead.

Hot tubs are sex ponds.

Get an au pair.

Get a nanny.

Book a spa weekend.

'Just take in some ironing if you don't have enough income.'

'Get another job if you don't have enough income.'

'Just get some money off a friend or relative if you don't have enough income.'

'If you'd worked harder at school/earlier in life, you could have been on £235,000 a year at the age of 33 like I am.'

'I don't mind my husband/partner having female friends, and having contact with her that I'm not a party to, and going away with her, and sharing a bed with her, because I'm not insecure, and I TRUST him....' I'm a COOL wife!

'I went to a red brick uni, and am definitely middle class.'

'Everyone I know - in MY social circle - didn't start having babies til the age of 42-44 years old. It's perfectly normal.'

'Of course it's easy to leave your husband after 40 years together, (at the age of 60,) and start over. Many women I know have done it. Gone to uni to get a degree, retrained, and got a fabulous new career, and a wonderful new man at 64. Happens ALL THE TIME in MY social circle...'

There's loads more.

People getting distressed at the idea of a baby in anything other than a white baby gro. Anything else just looks sooooo uncomfortable doncha know. (I suspect by uncomfortable they mean 'common')

'My 9 year old is still in a rear facing carseat'

"We cook everything from scratch!"

"Fruit is terrible for children - so full of sugar."

MN children are always "sporty" and "growing like a weed".

@FeckinCat

"We cook everything from scratch!"

"Fruit is terrible for children - so full of sugar."

OMG I missed that one/forgot about that one!

Meanwhile in the real world ... NO-ONE cooks everything from scratch. Only in the parallel world of mumsnet.

@Mattttttt

A chicken can feed a family of 4 for a week.

The only time Ihave ever seen this is on threads about MN cliches, never on an actual thread. When does it get posted? Is it only on a topic I have hidden I wonder, does everyone else see it being posted?

I do know someone who does cook everything from scratch. Her family eat more in one meal than I eat in a whole day. And then she wonders why she's overweight.

Everyone has anxiety.

Leaving the children with your completely useless husband and booking yourself a spa day, will make everything better.

Everyone eats ravioli on toast on "cheap white bread" when they want to be naughty with " proper butter".

"we've lost sight of what a healthy weight looks like"

Have my first

I’m so excited I’ve literally never done that!

"no is a complete sentence"

Lol it's actually not and most recipients of this 'sentence' feel that way too

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4156516-To-throw-away-the-chicken-every-week

this recent thread contains a great example of a magical chicken.

'This week we bought one large chicken for two teens and two adults.
Sunday they had a roast so used one breast.
Monday was fajitas so the other breadt was used.
Tuesday we stripped the rest of the meat and they had chicken and veg curry.
Wednesday I boiled the carcass and used the stock and remaining scrappy bits of meat in a stew.'

@CounsellorTroi

"we've lost sight of what a healthy weight looks like"

Hahaha yesssss multiple times a week a thread eliciting this type of response goes up

The only time Ihave ever seen this is on threads about MN cliches, never on an actual thread. When does it get posted? Is it only on a topic I have hidden I wonder, does everyone else see it being posted?

Many years ago I do remember a couple of threads where people were claiming they got a roast dinner, a curry and a stir-fry out of one chicken.

A lot of posters were boiling the carcass and adding a shit tonne of veg to make chicken stock.

Fuck that, give me an oxo cube any day.

@CounsellorTroi

"we've lost sight of what a healthy weight looks like"

Yesssss. This exact phrase. It's like bots have been activated.

"namechanged for this as it's outing"
I've always wondered why that matters. Surely just changing and posting without mentioning it is far more secure?

When a post has incorrect spellings or grammar and punctuation or colloquialisms; someone will ask 'are you ok OP?' They really don't care if they're ok at all but want to indirectly point it out....

"It's not about you" when it's patently affecting a person to the point of needing other perspectives......so obviously about them.....