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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my friend has taken me for a mug?

601 replies

PenAndPaperback · 02/02/2021 19:02

Back in December, I made an online listing for my 2018 MacBook on Facebook marketplace and received a ton of 'lowball' offers or people asking me to drive an hour plus to deliver it to their place. A friend of mine messaged me, telling me that her current laptop had broken down and that she's having trouble finding work because of that (she's a freelancer).

She asked if I could 'sell' it to her first and that she'd pay it back in instalments after paying off her kids' stuff etc, before telling me that she would get back to me because she had to calculate everything. She eventually came up with a payment plan that lasted almost 2 years and I told her that I'd just give it to her as I didn't need the money and that if I were to bring it in for 'trade-in' I was told that I'd get basically nothing for it anyway.

So I dropped it off in her mailbox, and I thought that that was that. Fast forward to last week, she was sending me screenshots on her computer, and it was on a Windows laptop! I asked her in a semi-joking way, oh, did the MacBook spoil and she said that no, she's just using her old laptop and that she's using the one I sent her for 'storage'. If I had known she didn't really need it I definitely wouldn't have given it to her!

I'm not going to ask for it back, of course. But AIBU to be a bit miffed off by all this?

OP posts:
fullofhope100 · 03/02/2021 19:36

WTAF? You are most definitely NOT BU!

DrManhattan · 03/02/2021 20:33

Feel so bad for you op. You sound like a lovely person.
You could tell her you have all the deets, serial numbers etc but she's probably gonna lie. You could tell her you know she's lying and block her. She's a disgusting person, be glad you aren't her

littlefireseverywhere · 03/02/2021 20:35

Tell her you need it back!

AdobeWanKenobi · 03/02/2021 21:10

@littlefireseverywhere

Tell her you need it back!
Have you actually read the thread? Or even just OPs posts? If you hit see all below any of OPs posts there they are.
Original poster
PenAndPaperback · 03/02/2021 21:11

Sent a 'did you sell it?' on WhatsApp but I'm on one grey tick which I think means I'm blocked? Her posts no longer show up in my Facebook feed but I logged out and went to her page and there's still plenty of new posts so I'm assuming I'm blocked there too??

OP posts:
SchruteFarm · 03/02/2021 21:13

She definitely sold it! You're not the mug OP, she is.
It's a bitter pill to swallow but a lesson learnt! Forget about her and move on, she's not worth thinking about.

icelollycraving · 03/02/2021 21:19

Yep. Blocked. I’d be letting mutual friends know. Terrible.

ChronicallyCurious · 03/02/2021 21:22

Can you search her on your Facebook when you’re logged in? Can you still see her in your friends list?

HeidiHaughton · 03/02/2021 21:22

She's blocked you. There's your proof.
You won't get any response. She's moved onto the next mug.

Mummy7777 · 03/02/2021 21:24

That is so sad. I'm so gutted for you. I would hate to lose a friend over something like this. More her loss than yours x

GreatExpectationalized · 03/02/2021 21:24

We saw this coming, but it’s still hard to believe! No good deed goes unpunished. This is one of the most epic CF stories ever. She clearly has no shame.

Yesmate · 03/02/2021 21:28

If you can see her fb you aren’t blocked. She may have removed you as a friend though. If her profile picture is still showing on her WhatsApp then you aren’t blocked. One grey tick simply means the message hasn’t been delivered yet.

toocold54 · 03/02/2021 21:30

Message her again tomorrow then I’d be ringing her from a different number and putting her on the spot. Or getting someone to write on her Facebook wall. I’m so angry for you!

Original poster
PenAndPaperback · 03/02/2021 21:32

We don't really have mutual friends. I don't exactly know anyone else from back when I was volunteering, and all the 'mutual friends' we have on Facebook are just her friends that have added me for no reason at all (well one tried to sell me makeup but that's the only one who has actually spoken to me).

OP posts:
Original poster
PenAndPaperback · 03/02/2021 21:38

I can't see or search for her Facebook when I'm logged in but she does show up when I'm logged out on private browsing.

OP posts:
Passthewinebottle · 03/02/2021 21:40

I'd turn up on her doorstep when I know she'll be in & ask for it back. Absolute CF! Makes my blood boil!

AwaAnBileYerHeid · 03/02/2021 21:50

I'd also be turning up on her doorstep. At the very least, I'd be writing her a letter and sending it outlining how hurt you are that she's taken advantage of your kindness and screwed you over for a few quid. Horrid person.

ChronicallyCurious · 03/02/2021 21:52

Wow definitely blocked! Constitutes stealing IMO and clearly it does to her as she wouldn’t have blocked you if she didn’t think she’d done anything wrong. I’d also be turning up at her house.

Duckberg · 03/02/2021 21:55

I'd send a link to this thread to any of her contacts that you can access.

HotToddyColdSauvignon · 03/02/2021 21:59

Could you usually see a time stamp on her WhatsApp? Ie - last seen?

If you can’t see that anymore it means she’s blocked you. Also could mean she’s turned it off but it would be too much of a coincidence

Ileflottante · 03/02/2021 22:03

Absolute lying cunt. I’m really raging for you OP. I can be a very vengeful person and I believe actions have consequences so it’s probably just as well I don’t know her ‘business’ page on Facebook. She’s MLM twat isn’t she?

GreenlandTheMovie · 03/02/2021 22:07

What an effort she went to, concocting a story and asking for monthly payments and everything, to steal this computer.

I think people like that tend to be bit like fantasists, they over-value things and mistakenly assume other people are stupid and won't notice what they are doing.

She sounds like a bit of a psychopath. I think you need to keep the pressure on and watch her crack! Making what she did public amongst mutual friends is often a good tactic, but phrase it so that you seem really kind "I'm sure x didn't intend to deprive me of my computer, but I only gave it to her because she couldn't afford to buy one at the time, and now I've found she doesn't need it, I'd really like it back".

lighteincastlewindow · 03/02/2021 22:09

I think this is just a bitter pill to swallow. If you wanted to push it further you can tell her as mentioned previously that you are reporting it as stolen. (Even though you can't if there is a text trail to say you are giving it to her). But you can pretend and say:

You have contacted apple with the serial number, Mac address etc and they have no ticket created for a return of that computer. (And a computer that new would have been given a value in gift cards) so you have to assume she/you have been ripped off and you are going to file a complaint with the police. That you have left a find process on the Mac and that apple are going to trace it and will provide that information to the police. That she may be required to make a statement to police as you have to next week and you'll have to give her details as part of that statement.

Obviously nothing will happen because you gave it away (never give anything away again) but t least you can give her some discomfort and might smoke her out.

She'll tell you next she spilled something on it and fried the logic board though and you can call her a lying bitch but the Mac is gone, the money is gone and you have to move on. A hard lesson, but you were very kind and so no shame in that. Just protect yourself a bit better.

Duckberg · 03/02/2021 22:10

That's really very cuntish behaviour.

Id have no trouble signing up her email and home address to lots of spam/porn/dildo mailing lists.

WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot1 · 03/02/2021 22:14

@Duckberg

That's really very cuntish behaviour.

Id have no trouble signing up her email and home address to lots of spam/porn/dildo mailing lists.

And mobile number. Don't forget that. That one will be the most frustrating.
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