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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my friend has taken me for a mug?

601 replies

PenAndPaperback · 02/02/2021 19:02

Back in December, I made an online listing for my 2018 MacBook on Facebook marketplace and received a ton of 'lowball' offers or people asking me to drive an hour plus to deliver it to their place. A friend of mine messaged me, telling me that her current laptop had broken down and that she's having trouble finding work because of that (she's a freelancer).

She asked if I could 'sell' it to her first and that she'd pay it back in instalments after paying off her kids' stuff etc, before telling me that she would get back to me because she had to calculate everything. She eventually came up with a payment plan that lasted almost 2 years and I told her that I'd just give it to her as I didn't need the money and that if I were to bring it in for 'trade-in' I was told that I'd get basically nothing for it anyway.

So I dropped it off in her mailbox, and I thought that that was that. Fast forward to last week, she was sending me screenshots on her computer, and it was on a Windows laptop! I asked her in a semi-joking way, oh, did the MacBook spoil and she said that no, she's just using her old laptop and that she's using the one I sent her for 'storage'. If I had known she didn't really need it I definitely wouldn't have given it to her!

I'm not going to ask for it back, of course. But AIBU to be a bit miffed off by all this?

OP posts:
CallmeAngelina · 03/02/2021 14:12

Look, she's clearly no friend of yours anymore, so what have you to lose by just messaging her something along the lines of "Why don't we stop with the game-playing here. You know and I know that you have sold my laptop that I passed over to you in good faith thinking you had need of it. More fool me, for taking you at your word."

You could always ask her for a donation from her profit for a charity of your choice, you know, just to shame her further.

TillyTopper · 03/02/2021 14:12

Wow, that's very cheeky! I'd be pretty careful in any future dealing with her (i.e. she'd get nothing!) Not much you can do apart from put it down to experience though.

HarrysWife · 03/02/2021 14:15

I love the police story idea to be fair

NettleTea · 03/02/2021 14:17

what is she saying to account for her initial claim that she was using it for storage?

AliceinBunniland · 03/02/2021 14:19

OP cannot go to small claims court. she gave the laptop away. The friend may have tricked her but it's not a simple case of the friend not paying for something she bought form OP or not giving back something she borrowed.

Riv12345 · 03/02/2021 14:22

@slashlover

Alright no need to get funny
I did read back the previous threads
I must of missed it

I'm out of here
Hope you manage to sort this op.
Some people on here think they own threads 😂😂
Sad really.

Longdistance · 03/02/2021 14:22

I’d be spamming her MLM page telling everyone what she’s like Blush
Harsh?

Bluntness100 · 03/02/2021 14:24

Presumably the friend has evidence of this text conversation, which would prove that OP declined payment and therefore has no recourse? Depends on the exact messages I suppose

Presumably the op gas rhe messages where the woman obtained the goods by deception?

I don’t think the point is to get recourse. It’s to shame her and let her know the op knows.

I’m not sure why the messing about though, the answer has been given, a cheery “don’t worry, I have the serial number and apple are going to trace it” will suffice enough to panic her.

Beeeees · 03/02/2021 14:27

@NettleTea

what is she saying to account for her initial claim that she was using it for storage?
Maybe she used the money to buy a wardrobe?
ScalpHelp · 03/02/2021 14:27

@Bluntness100

I don’t think the point is to get recourse. It’s to shame her and let her know the op knows.

What exactly does that have to do with small claims court, which is what I was responding to? Why are you quoting me with such irrelevancy?

Apple doesn’t trace serial numbers either.

Sparklfairy · 03/02/2021 14:34

@ScalpHelp Don't be rude. You said she'd have no recourse in court as OP gave it to CF for free. Bluntness said recourse wasn't the point. The point of small claims was to shame her, and give her a headache and stress, and let CF know she won't be walked over. There's a fairly good chance CF would settle with some kind of 'leave me alone' payment before it got to court anyway so their could be monetary recourse too.

Personally I would think that in court, if the whole correspondence was looked at, it would be seen that OP was clearly conned out of a laptop she intended to sell and a judgement in her favour would be issued, but none of us can know for sure.

geojellyfish · 03/02/2021 14:36

I'm so cross on your behalf. If you want to keep this pretence up, you could say you had Apple Care+ for the MacBook which covers repairs for three years and so you will be contacting Apple regarding the recycling.

However, it's pretty clear what's happened so I would be more tempted to cut through the bullshit and call her out.

IMNOTSHOUTING · 03/02/2021 14:37

I agree that there's no way this will get anywhere in small claims court ut I would absolutely be making her feel guilty about being a total dick.

Bluntness100 · 03/02/2021 14:38

[quote ScalpHelp]@Bluntness100

I don’t think the point is to get recourse. It’s to shame her and let her know the op knows.

What exactly does that have to do with small claims court, which is what I was responding to? Why are you quoting me with such irrelevancy?

Apple doesn’t trace serial numbers either.[/quote]
Honestly you don’t need to turn this into a bun fight. No one is attacking you. It’s just a discussion,

Cheeseandlobster · 03/02/2021 14:39

@Scbchl

I'd just message her saying "being honest, I am doubting your story. I gave you that laptop for free as you said you needed one for work and I felt guilty. I lost out on money I could of made selling it by trying to do a good thing to help you. It was only two years old and had absolutely NO issues. The fact you cant even give me any evidence to show that you did hand it to a shop or to apple is really making me question your sincerity. If I am wrong I apologise, but I feel like I have given my laptop away under false pretences.
I would go with this op
ZippedyDooDa · 03/02/2021 14:40

I would ask for it back, if it's clear that she doesn't need it. You only gave it to her because she told you she needed it.

fimimifi · 03/02/2021 14:44

@ZippedyDooDa

I would ask for it back, if it's clear that she doesn't need it. You only gave it to her because she told you she needed it.
Maybe try to RTFT...
ZippedyDooDa · 03/02/2021 14:47

Yeah sorry..........

ZippedyDooDa · 03/02/2021 14:49

@fimimifi
Maybe try not to be so rude. Mwah.

fimimifi · 03/02/2021 14:50

@ZippedyDooDa I wouldn't call that rude. But sorry to have offended you.

ZippedyDooDa · 03/02/2021 14:52

Thanks, I appreciate that. I'm sorry not to have RTFT - I'm an idiot and often forget to check how many pages there are....

OP I would also second what Scbchl suggested.

Flippyferloppy · 03/02/2021 14:54

I'd send her a "here's what I think really happened" message and asking her to either provide proof that you are wrong, or pay you the £450 you were selling it for.

She's no friend and I would be cutting her off completely (and putting the story on her Facebook if she failed to come up with the money)

ExitChasedByABear · 03/02/2021 14:56

@PenAndPaperback

Messaged her for the shop details on Facebook messenger as she's online and still posting marketing stuff and inspirational posts under the guise of 'before the shop closes for the day' but of course she is now showing as being offline right after I pressed 'send'.
That’s a shame Sad Any remote chance of her telling the truth is just further diminished by her evasive actions. I guess in her eyes, you gave it to her not lent it to her and therefore she thinks she can do whatever she wants with it because it’s now hers. She knows she’s in the wrong, but she won’t own up to her actions. Your so-called friend doesn’t sound at all trustworthy to be honest.

You might as well call her out and just ask her how much she got for it. Either she sold it or Apple did in fact take it in, in which case she would have received something from them. Sadly you might not get anything back from her, but hopefully even an acknowledgment of her misleading actions might make the friendship salvageable but I somehow doubt it. And would you even want to remain friends who has been so dishonest?

quarentini · 03/02/2021 14:58

I would put a Facebook post on .saying something like.
Been on hold to Apple customer service for ages.

That should get a response 😀

BosleyCharliesAngel · 03/02/2021 14:59

At this stage, I'd be very tempted to do what @Flippyferloppy has suggested.
Call her out on it - at this stage you've nothing to lose because if she has recycled it/sold it on/repurposed it, you won't be seeing the device again and you know where you stand with her.
Say you believe that she sold it after pleading poverty to you and played on your generous and kind nature.
Say that you don't believe her stories about the camera going wonky or any of the other stuff she claims has happened. You just don't believe her.
Ask her to provide proof and if she can't, cut your losses. Don't give her any more headspace and move on from this.
Stop pussyfooting around situations, deal with them head on and call people out on their bullshit!

Now, get to it Smile