To ask what the last 12 months has made you realise

[Carolbaskinstiger]

So this time last year the world was pretty different. I was on a health kick (that I believe would have lasted if not for lockdown), had a booked diary of parties/holidays etc.

A year later and things are pretty different. The people’s parties I would have gone to I probably haven’t spoken to now in months, the fitness is out of the window etc.

But on the positive side I’ve realised:
I really do enjoy dh’s company
My business is more secure than I ever realised
I’m fairly happy not doing very much I’m probably quite lazy
I do love the pub.

On the other hand
While I have good friends - I don’t really have a friend I can just ring up and chat
I really miss seeing my parents - so maybe rely on them a lot

What have you realised over the past year?

Sorry I did add paragraphs in there originally

That I’m really quite lonely. I am single and live alone and usually do well but lockdown has been so hard and I am just so glad I have been going to work during this as I don’t know what I would have done. I miss my family more than I can say and I can’t wait to have time with them.

Life is not about stuff ..it is all about family
That what ever I was chasing on the treadmill of life just wasnt worth it!
I like me and I like how I have kept our small and extended family unit sane!
I have more empathy than I thought for others
I dont mind a queue
I love quiet

That we're all struggling with something.

That I lost so much of myself during some hard, hard years and need to make some big changes.

That life (and death) blindsides you from nowhere when you're busy worrying about something else.

That I don't like people in my personal space.
That life is precious and is slipping away.
That you can never get time back.
That I do like getting dressed up for work.
That I have no interest in cooking.
That cats make the funniest videos.

That, with hindsight, early 2020 wasn’t the easiest time to move countries. That I adore my husband and son, but it is much easier to write books when you’re alone in the house, rather than juggling homeschooling etc.

I'd clearly make a good hermit as I'm not finding staying at home too hard.

I can dig deep when I need to.

How much money I actually have if I don’t waste it on expensive dinners/drinks/nights out every weekend

That there’s actually a fair amount of free ways to spend a weekend without the default always being cinema, bowling or crazy golf whenever we’re bored

That DP and I do not make good business partners!

That the town i moved to 15 years ago is home & i have some good friends nearby
I do need to work for more than financial reasons
I enjoy shopping & meeting friends for a drink/coffee/lunch
I liked going to the gym
I need to get outside for my mental health
It's OK to wear the same clothes 3 days running (well maybe it's not but noone gets close enough to see what I'm wearing anyway
I'm good at baking

That social interaction - in person - is incredibly important.
As a society we are too quick to reduce it, through social media, video tech etc and covid has shown me just how much I need it and my family need it.

That I’m in the completely wrong career - but I already knew that.

That I miss soft play centres and farm parks

That I have an incredible bond with DH and DC, and a great support system - but I'd be very happy to only see 3 of my 10 'friends' again after this.

That life can change in a flash, that we are almost powerless in the face of natural disasters. I'm reading Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel at present and each summer they're visited by sweatings which kills so many.

Me and my DH are much closer as we have had to rely on each other and be together within the same 4 walls continually. People are selfish and it’s because they are stressed and concerned.

I realise that I drank far too much....even more so at the start of lockdown. Gave up alcohol in May and no intention of drinking again! I realised how much I love my husband and how compatible we really are. I realise we can't take anything for granted and to make the most of things when we get out of lockdown. Family days out and trips. To not get hung up on the little things!

I'm still alive! Whoo hoo!

That moving in with my partner was definitely the right decision.

I like being at home nearly all the time (but would like it to be through choice)

That most of my friends aren’t that bothered about me.

That I’m really more anti social than I thought I was as not having to see a lot of people is suiting me quite nicely .
I am quite good at cutting men’s hair
I am no good at cutting the dogs hair

Also that I like my own company better than any other company. It's wonderfully private!

That I was behaving like a doormat, taken for granted by the whole family.
That my husband is boring & sefish.
I have plucked up the courage to return to work after years as a sahm. Realised that I deserve and need a life of my own.
This year has actually been good for me 😉

That my children and DP are all I really need. That I can cook and don't need to eat out all the time.
I miss my dad, step mum and work friends.
Also that my sister and mum who I was really close to are the most selfish people I have ever met! Still having friends round and drinking.
I had a baby in lockdown (first one) wasn't to bad had all I needed DP

That we are a family of introverts, expect my DS 4 who is the worlds biggest extrovert.

I have a strong marriage and can make it through a crappy year because I want to come home to my family after a shift.

I really miss hanging out at my in laws most days

However much of an effort it is to interact with my own family

I thought that I led quite a secluded unsociable life, turns out I didn't, and I'm really missing people from work, kids hobbies, acquaintances & friends.

When DH and I used to wonder what we'd do without the timetable of children's sports/hobbies taking up most evenings, some weekends, and trawling around the country for overnights for competitions. Now I know, and sadly I think some competing is over forever as training hasn't been possible.

That it's not the eating out that's the problem, it's the eating at home because I make nice things, bake too much and love food.

• That I actually have some incredible friends and family who are always checking in on me during all this
• How much we take our freedom for granted. I was very much a 'traveller', even within the UK, and on any time or days off would be away to another part of the country to climb or hike. Having that taken away made me realise just how much it means to me to be able to do that. Plenty of people can't, for reasons aside from covid. I think a lot about the people whose lives haven't changed much during covid, people with disabilities who are housebound for example, and it makes me extremely grateful for what I've been able to do. I won't ever take it for granted again.
• How much hugs and physical touch and social interactions really mean for people. I have friends who have actually developed quite serious mental health issues over lockdown due to the isolation, who have never had any issues before and were always really steady and stable.

That I had actually got my life to suit me as it was pre March 2020. I like where I live. In a town but by the sea. I can walk to the seafront from my house. I have a safe job because I am risk averse so joined the NHS 20 years ago. I had a hobby I love and miss terribly, singing in a choir. Nice friends and family close by. I have also realised you can’t see enough live music and every gig I didn’t go to.

I want my life back exactly as it was.

@Maryward 🙌 good for you