Why do thin people say they’re fat all the time?

[Lollipop1234]

Starting to get irritated by friend who is always texting about her weight, how many snacks she’s had, how her stomach is massive, how enormous she is and that she’s disgusted with herself as she’s nearly 9 stone and has never been that heavy in her life.....saying she looks like a beached whale etc.saying she’s having to buy size 10.

Friend is size 8 and no more than 8.5 stone wet through. Friend is 50+ so old enough to know better. Is this attention seeking?

I am constantly having to text back about how she’s not fat at all and has nothing to worry about, but it’s starting to annoy me! She does it a bit with clothes too, always buying new stuff and then saying she has nothing to wear and looks scruffy, when it’s obvious she’s made effort!

Being size 10-12 and well over 9 stone myself, I find it all a bit bizarre to be honest! Does she think I look like a beached whale? Am I saying the wrong thing? What am I supposed to say?

My dsis - who is otherwise perfectly lovely - has throughout my life referred from time to time to her fat tum or on occasion offered to lend me clothes which clearly wouldn't fit me. She's always been slim/thin and as an adult I've never been lighter than her and am probably now about 4 stone heavier (same height).

I could never understand why she would do that 🤷‍♀️.

Except they don’t just talk to their friends do they? They make other people listen to their tedious navel gazing as well. Like my colleague does and numerous other vain, egocentric women I’ve met before. It’s not like it’s uncommon.
“Give it a rest for Christ’s sake.”, tends to not go down that well.

Your friend sounds completely obsessive.

However, as a fairly slim person I do get a bit aggravated if I occasionally say in passing that I've put on weight and will probably need some new clothes to have countless people saying "There's nothing of you", "You're like a stick" when actually I'm a normal size 10 having to get some size 12 clothes and think it's ok to say if I've developed a lockdown belly like lots of other people. I've just learned not to mention it as a topic of conversation.

@pictish

Except they don’t just talk to their friends do they? They make other people listen to their tedious navel gazing as well. Like my colleague does and numerous other vain, egocentric women I’ve met before. It’s not like it’s uncommon. “Give it a rest for Christ’s sake.”, tends to not go down that well.

🙄

🤷‍♀️

However, as a fairly slim person I do get a bit aggravated if I occasionally say in passing that I've put on weight and will probably need some new clothes to have countless people saying "There's nothing of you", "You're like a stick"

Same. So annoying. It's like "shut up skinny person, how dare you have a slightly negative opinion on your weight!!"

I was like this when in teens and twenties. Looking back at photos now I can see I had a lovely figure and was quite slim, but at the time all I could see was fat. I wouldn't wear tops which showed the tops of my arms, wore nothing tight fitting, wore baggy everything, never ever wore a bikini and hated wearing a swim suit.

I had bulimia for about 10 years I was so disgusted with the way I looked.

In all that time I thought I was fat, I was only a size 8 - 10 with BMI around 18.5

Now I'm size 14 - 16 and 3.5 stone heavier. If I ever get back to a size 8, I'll love my body. But then I hated it. I really did. I wasn't attention seeking. I just genuinely thought I was fat and disgusting. Perhaps your friend has an eating disorder or body dysmorphia. Sounds like at the bare minimum she has v low self esteem and doesn't realise she isn't fat. It's not her fault.

From personal experience... the thin people I see refer to themselves as fat have issues with how they see themselves. They do not see other people as fat... they only see themselves like that.

I’d just ditch her, she sounds awful and self obsessed.

It’s not all thin people; I’m a size 10 and never mention weight. I don’t give a damn about it either

Oh and by the way - you are pretty slim too and I don't think you get the irony of your post!

Currently I am underweight and trying hard to gain weight. Before the weight loss (mental health reasons mainly) I was a healthy and slim weight, but I constantly worried about being fat. I am embarrassed really... But I did hate myself. I don't think I'd have complained about it to a larger friend though. I only ever mentioned it to my ex. He thought I had serious issues and body dysmorphia, and actually I think he had a point there. It could be the same for your friend. It does sound unusual behaviour to me for a woman of her age, but I don't know. It must be tiring for you though. I'm not sure how I'd handle it. I'd probably limit my responses to her on weight related issues, or be frank and say "you're slimmer than me, do you think I'm fat?" To which I'm guessing (if she was like me) she'd say that it's just different for you and that you look good at your size whereas as she looks out of proportion and rubbish... It might stop her from sending you the texts though.

@XenoBitch

From personal experience... the thin people I see refer to themselves as fat have issues with how they see themselves. They do not see other people as fat... they only see themselves like that.

That's definitely how it was for me. Everyone else looked normal in my eyes, and carried their weight well no matter what size they were, whereas I was hideous and a freak. I just couldn't see it any differently.

That's definitely how it was for me. Everyone else looked normal in my eyes, and carried their weight well no matter what size they were, whereas I was hideous and a freak. I just couldn't see it any differently.

Same for me, despite being what others would view as a slim size 8-10. It's psychological, and runs much deeper than the "attention seeking" theory that some people are incapable of seeing beyond.