To take a 3 year old to the Ritz at 17:30?

[PreschoolattheRitz]

We've been invited by grandparents at the end of April.

If you order your three year old some food he/she enjoys and a huge dessert then it should be fine! Seeing as it’s a one off event it would be fine to give them an iPad if they get grouchy!

Please don’t even consider it. It would be so unfair on the other guests and they may ask you to leave.

Yes I would have taken mine but they came everywhere with us anyway. If we wanted a life, they came too. But we had no-one to look after them so we had no choice.

My view is that if it’s before 7:30 it’s perfectly reasonable to expect children to be in any restaurant.... however, ONLY if you are prepared to take your child out the very minute he/she gets bored/starts to behave in a way that disturbs others, whether it’s a sandwich in Costa or a 3 course meal in a Michelin star restaurant. I would have taken mine at that time and that age, but I also took her everywhere with the understanding we left if there was any chance she’d disturb anyone else.. it’s chicken and egg the only way children learn how to behave in that situation and therefore give you the option to go, is by getting them used to it but it can be an expensive trial and error process! You know your child, you know if you’d put other diners first so up to you really!

Is your 3 year old prone to melt downs? If there is any likelihood of this then I would not take them. It is simply not fair on the other customers, some of whom are no doubt going for afternoon tea as a special treat.

I used to go and drink at the Rivoli Bar at the Ritz sometimes, I have only ever seen children inside who were maybe 9 or 10 upwards (not in the bar but in the reception, surrounding areas etc). It is definitely not the place for fidgety loud children - I say that as someone who has a child myself. I just would not have taken here there at that age.

You have to be prepared to whisk your child up and take them out if they begin to behave 'badly' It is simply not fair on the other guests otherwise.

@oakleaffy

European and Middle Eastern children generally seem much better behaved than British children in dining places. Even quite young children sit sensibly. Maybe a Cultural thing?

Whaaaaaaaat?

Not in my experience! Christ alive!

@oakleaffy. I must have had different experiences to you. Most children nowadays (my own included) are much worse at sitting quietly and behaving then children were when I was young. British children aren't great, but ime Italian children are much worse. They also stay up much later which compounds the problem. Middle Eastern kids tend to be very spoilt (boys especially)... it is a society which dotes on small children.

My 3yo DS would absolutely love this! Aw never thought of it before, can’t wait to take him for afternoon tea now!

I would never have done anything like that with my eldest but my youngest. Absolutely, he would have coloured or played quietly with some small toys.
It totally depends on the child. Also, be prepared to take them out if necessary.

I went when I was 8 and my sister was a baby, it was my mum's 38th birthday treat - weirdly exactly how old I'll be next month... I was very good and loved it, but I was 8... and sister was 4 months so not the same. I think it depends a bit how you sell it to your little one, 3 is old enough to be bribed a bit and convinced its a super grown up treat!

The only time I have taken my 3 and 6 year olds anywhere this year was a fairly ordinary cafe that also served afternoon teas. We’ve relied on picnics and alfresco eating the rest of the year but this day it was absolutely tipping it down so we had no choice but to eat indoors.

The couple sitting on the next table to ours hard ordered the afternoon tea and it was clearly a bit of a treat for them - it looked like a neighbour had taken an older lady out for her first trip out since lockdown.

My boys weren’t behaving badly enough to take them outside (besides which the weather was apocalyptic), but they were being a bit fidgety, a little too loud and generally not entirely angelic. It was frankly all a bit stressful and I felt guilty about disturbing the atmosphere. I can’t imagine how much worse it would have been if we’d been in the Ritz and not a neighbourhood cafe.

If money isn’t a problem, ask them to book you a room. You can disappear off after tea & enjoy the room - breakfast is always good too!
Alternatively, accept & pretend you ds is poorly at the last minute. Or get a babysitter & enjoy the evening with your partner & his family. Why not? A few cocktails afterwards - make it a date night! I’d love to have something to look forward to right now!

I was a single parent when DD was that age and used to take her to restaurants all the time, as I literally would never have got out as I didn't have childcare. I took colouring books for her, reading books and various other bits to keep her entertained and she was absolutely fine. It depends how used to being out in restaurants your child is, I guess. Only you know how they'll behave.

Go enjoy the Ritz and get a babysitter!! Simples.

Sounds lovely if dc can sit still for a while? Some can, some can’t. Is it open?

Why not ask to book earlier?

If I had booked afternoon tea at the Ritz, it would be an expensive and very special treat, something I am not likely t do more than once. So I would be a little upset if a party with a 3 year old was seated beside me. I may end up relieved at the end if they are well behaved and monitored, but I would still have been on edge throughout, because I have rarely come across a 3 year old that sits quietly for an extended period of time.

Could you decline by video phoning them during the witching hour and saying “ oh this is 5.30 every night”. Also your husband or both of you could go if you were able to be using childcare. But I don’t think it will be open in April anyway.

I'd take my 4 year old, but not my 9 year old, he's loud and clumsy (like his Mum!)

Another regular at the Ritz here. It’s literally my favourite place (prepares to be shouted down for being shallow). I’m not well off (work as a nurse) but it’s a real treat that I save up for and take my daughter. I can’t wait to take my three year old twin granddaughters but definitely going to wait until they are older.

So why don't you say, thanks very much, we will get a babysitter so that way we will all enjoy it?!!

Ask them if they can rebook it for (a) later in the year and (b) earlier in the day.

@trevorandsimon

So why don't you say, thanks very much, we will get a babysitter so that way we will all enjoy it?!!

Because the 3 year old is also invited

Would you take them for tea anywhere at this time? Mine was brought up with tea at this time and a later meal/bedtime but yours I gather not. If you might take them somewhere for a treat at this time then go for it. Or explain to Grandparents that this is too late and would affect bedtime routine.

@Aprilx you sound amazingly sensitive. How do you get about if you can’t be in the same environment as a small child? What about public transport? Hotels? Museums? Do you literally have to stay within certain age brackets or feel anxious?