To take a 3 year old to the Ritz at 17:30?

[PreschoolattheRitz]

We've been invited by grandparents at the end of April.

Oh that sounds lovely. I'd have taken DS1 at 3 (not at 1 or 2 though) and he'd have enjoyed it and been charming...
BUT this year has been weird and DC haven't had practise going out to eat in ages so that would make me a bit wary.
(I'd probably still go though tbh)

I don't know whether things change hugely between 2 and 3 but we are doing well if we keep DS sat down for 30 mins for dinner. Absolutely no way would this happen. A late night is one thing (and yes, actually we are at home for 5pm in the vast vast majority if instances because.thats his routine and he is happiest in it).but a late night trying to keep him still in a chair? God no

www.tinytable.co.uk/2020/01/child-friendly-afternoon-tea-in-london.html

My daughter is 5 and I'd avoid the Ritz however there's some great suggestions on this link. I've been and it's very formal.

Maybe the in-laws could use their voucher to treat some friends and do something else nice with you instead.

I doubt anywhere will be open by then anyway but with my 5 yr old dd and 2yr old ds this wouldn't be happening- I'd be so stressed 😩 plus as people have said, other customers have treated themselves to a once in a lifetime (unless they go all the time!) treat

If you don’t fancy it don’t go and 5.30 wouldn’t have been ideal for mine but a lot of people have really hit the wrong end of the stick about it. There are often children at these hotel afternoon teas, it’s fine. There’s no reason to treat a to tourist trap afternoon tea any differently to any meal out - if it’s more hassle than it’s worth don’t bother, if not crack on.

@LizFlowers

The Ritz is apparently very child friendly and caters for small children who are taken there for tea.

For me, 5.30 is far too late. What is it with adults, who think they can dictate to parents what time to take young children out? Do they even realise your dc doesn’t like sandwiches or cake?

If the family wants to do something together, they need to come up with something more suitable. No way would my dd have sat still at this age. She is 12 and has boundless energy even today. Far more than the average child.

Oops I just have accidentally somehow pressed quote.

I'd just reply with "yes, we'll be there with bells on." It won't open by then anyway. If by some miracle it does, just say he's sick that day or something

I used to babysit in the West end hotels as a student (not the Ritz, but the Savoy and the Landmark) so there are children resident there. We occasionally ate "down stairs" most have a slightly less formal dining room that we would have used. Probrably not quite such young children, we often got room service. But the staff are used to children.

It might be "just a posh cafe", my daughter took me for a milestone Birthday, cost a lot of money, I would not have wanted small kids running around, had enough of that going out for meals normally.

@PreschoolattheRitz

Drip feed:

Husband's parents have been given a gift from their parents, to take us to the ritz including mine and my husband's three year old.

We've been summoned invited at the end of April at 17:30.

I'm going to have to decline and upset 4 people but I honestly can't see how this will be fun for ANYONE!

For one occasion you'd make it work. Nap during the afternoon. Light lunch etc.

I don't understand parents incapable of deviating from a schedule and catering to a slightly different timescale.

We have managed afternoon tea with all of the children in our family in our family at many venues.

I imagine that the 530 slot is due to the lack of availability at other times.

You sound ungrateful. I'd have thought that after this last year, having this to. Look forward to would be lovely!

We took my son for his 11th birthday in 2019 (his request). He was the youngest child there. He was suited and booted and behaved impeccably . Can you get a sitter, so you & Your DH can enjoy it. It really is a wonderful experience.

Not to jinx everyone else but I'm hoping for lockdown to continue.

Did I read that correctly? You'd rather the whole country was in lockdown with people unable to see their families and losing their incomes so that you don't have to decline an invitation to tea at The Ritz?

If it would spoil anyone else’s enjoyment, no.

I wouldn't, just because I think of anywhere where people are spending alot of £ as off limit to small children. Also, my two would have been climbing the walls at that age so were not the sitting down nicely types anyway.

I'd have taken mine. They have been used to eating out since newborns and would also dh behave and were never creatures of habit so late nights never an issue. You don't sound like you fancy it though so why not get a baby sitter for a couple of hours. I assume if they ritz is open for tea then restrictions will be lifted enough for a friend to look after your child for a couple of hours.

I would take mine, but he’s autistic and tea and cake is his great passion so he can be relied upon to sit still as long as he has a constant supply of food. Would I take any of my nieces and nephews at that age? Not a chance! Your parents are mad!

www.theritzlondon.com/dine-with-us/afternoon-tea/

@ArosGartref

Imagine all those middle class people deciding to go on their first post pandemic trip out to the Ritz and having it ruined by an overtired toddler. On that basis, I say do it. Otherwise maybe suggest nandos?

Ah yes, all those middle class bastards like nurses, teachers and social workers. How dare they save up for a treat and expect to enjoy it? (And yes, nurses and teachers do go to the Ritz - just not very often and it's a massive treat if they do).

What a brave class warrior you are

I salute you OP! I love an afternoon tea at the Ritz whenever we’re in London.....it’s a very expensive treat for us! I definitely wouldn’t want an over tired 3 year old to waste it!

@Wearywithteens

“He wouldn't screach but he'd moan from boredom, bless him.”

In which case don’t ruin everyone else’s afternoon tea at the Ritz. They won’t be blessing him.

RTFT

I also don’t know why some people are so scathing about routines. Some children can cope well with later nights and others don’t. My 4yo is an owl and can happily stretch bedtimes and not be grumpy. She hates mornings though. With her, a dinner out would have been better than lunch as she really needed her nap. In contrast, My youngest cannot cope past about 7.15 and often implodes earlier and it’s hard enough if we eat together at home after 6. She might change over the next year or two but I can’t see dinners out with her for a long time.

I would have taken both my children. Many moons ago we took a last minute long weekend in a country house hotel with my 2 year old son and 3.5 year old daughter. On 2 of the 3 nights at dinner other elderly guests came and commented on how well behaved they were at the table. (I was very proud).
They were typicall kids pretty feral when out playing but understood a time and place.

Why would OP be consulted? In the immortal MN phrase, it’s an invitation, not a summons. An invitation has been made to tea at the Ritz, OP feels it would be more pain than pleasure so she politely declines it. Job done.

It's not an invite when it causes drama when declined. Which this will.

Did I read that correctly? You'd rather the whole country was in lockdown with people unable to see their families and losing their incomes so that you don't have to decline an invitation to tea at The Ritz?

I believe its called "a joke"

OP, what's the problem? You don't want to go either way, your husband thinks it is a bad idea, he can tell his parents your 3 yo is not Ritz friendly and neither of you will enjoy it.
I personally would do it, they have lots of space, you don't have to keep him seated all the time. 16.30 probably would be a better time, but given you don't want to go either way it is irrelevant