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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this rude comment was unwarranted? (Supermarket rage!)

326 replies

CrossFitAddict · 15/01/2021 17:07

Just popped to the supermarket for a few bits and on exiting the checkouts I come out behind an elderly lady with another woman walking with her side by side (probably her daughter). It’s about 50ft to the exit and the elderly lady is walking extremely slowly holding onto a trolley (no problem with her at all), the other woman with her is walking at the same pace and blocking the walkway (she was rather large) so there’s a queue of us behind them.

As the area widened I walked quickly around them, a good distance from the elderly lady, and sped up to the entrance hearing the other woman shout loudly ‘some people can’t wait for other people can they’. I turned as I heard her (as did everyone else) and wanted to say that she should have moved to the side and walked single file behind the older lady if she had any manners but didn’t bother and just shook my head.

AIBU to think that if you’re walking with a slow moving person, you should move to the side rather than hold up everyone else and then take umbrage if someone overtakes you Angry.

OP posts:
Wheresmykimchi · 16/01/2021 15:43

But there's a WAY of doing things isn't there.

The other day I had to swerve past an old lady and whoever was with her and did so with a cheery excuse me as I passed.

Not because I'm a woman, or British , or because I have no backbone. Just because , I like nice vibes.

It's not hard.

LaceyBetty · 16/01/2021 15:46

I am utterly confused. What on earth is wrong or rude with passing someone walking slowly?

Wheresmykimchi · 16/01/2021 15:48

@CrossFitAddict

There was only one trolley that the elderly lady was pushing. The other woman wasn’t standing close to her to steady her but close enough that you couldn’t get between them politely even without Covid. Did she need to be out in a supermarket being that frail if she had someone to shop for her Hmm?

I certainly didn’t push past. I did a wide semi circle around them.

She obviously did it deliberately. I didn’t say anything as I didn’t want the elderly lady to think I was having a dig at her walking slowly.

People are just cunts really aren’t they?

Sorry I've just read this.

In what world was the elderly woman doing it on purpose?

To the PPs asking why OP was rude - read the tone of the posts.

Winterpaw · 16/01/2021 15:51

Hmmm 'popping' to the shop for "a few bits"? What was the hurry? You've got a bit of a cheek querying why there were two of them when your trip hardly sounds essential.

Normally I'd say there's no issue with overtaking slow/elderly walkers if it's done without being arsey about it. But the fact you've written this makes me think you likely were! What would you have done if you were in a bad mood?! Hmm"Bloody pissed off that someone wanted to create a problem over nothing with a complete stranger. She was lucky I was in a good mood!"

EmilyInParis · 16/01/2021 16:00

Yanbu OP.

What is hilarious is the amount of posters on MN who will find any excuse to rip someone to shreds. We're not robots void of emotion, we are human and other humans are allowed to piss us off.

That's perfectly normal. Some of the reactions on here are far from it.

Wheresmykimchi · 16/01/2021 16:01

@EmilyInParis

Yanbu OP.

What is hilarious is the amount of posters on MN who will find any excuse to rip someone to shreds. We're not robots void of emotion, we are human and other humans are allowed to piss us off.

That's perfectly normal. Some of the reactions on here are far from it.

If you read OPs posts, she was the one looking for a fight.
EmilyInParis · 16/01/2021 16:23

Looking for a fight? Oh do calm down.

"Good job I was in a better mood" doesn't suggest she was going to go all terminator on her arse does it?

Behave 🤣

Wheresmykimchi · 16/01/2021 16:24

@EmilyInParis

Looking for a fight? Oh do calm down.

"Good job I was in a better mood" doesn't suggest she was going to go all terminator on her arse does it?

Behave 🤣

She certainly thinks so!
Bearnecessity · 16/01/2021 16:25

Where's my...you are sneering...you are sneering at my semantic choice to use the words fat and gobby...and having a go at me for it because you have decided that for you it isn't on therefore it is not alright for other people to use it.

EmilyInParis · 16/01/2021 16:30

You can only make an opinion on the tone @Wheresmykimchi as you aren't the author of it. You don't get to state it as fact I'm afraid. Soz.

And we all know about opinions and what they are compared with 😝

MintyMabel · 16/01/2021 16:46

That's a whole heap of inference and assumption about a situation you didn't even see.
You really think the OP did absolutely nothing wrong and someone shouted at her for absolutely no reason? Having been in this situation plenty of times, I've met plenty of faux innocents like the OP.

MintyMabel likes to see the worst in an OP and add a layer of extra drama to the OP's account.

Or, has had experience of exactly this situation and understand people making posts like this rarely post the whole story.

But, if you prefer to take the word of someone who thinks it necessary to mention the size of the person, who wants to suggest they were deliberately holding people up, and has said she'd have retaliated of her mood had been different, that's up to you. It's clear to me OP is not a lovely, polite, person who inadvertently was incredibly rude. But nice of you to be paying attention to everything I post. Glad I keep you entertained.

ShastaBeast · 16/01/2021 17:13

@MintyMabel you are projecting and using your experiences as a template for other people’s experiences. This is the inference and assumptions. I prefer taking people at face value.

There’s nothing wrong with safely overtaking, some people just hate being overtaken. I’ve been blocked in by a van on the motorway trying to overtake in a 50 limit. I couldn’t go faster but he kept speeding up to stop me. I’ve had another experience in the street pushing my child in a buggy. Two ladies walking and talking slowly. One carrying a bag on the side I wanted to pass on. I said “excuse me” and got told off for that. Pre covid so distance no issue.

DeathValley69 · 16/01/2021 17:25

Slow people should move aside. YANBU

lindyloo57 · 16/01/2021 17:38

This happed to me first lockdown, I pop in a shop for a couple of things, they only let so many in at a time, my turn to go in, older lady in front was really slow and not much room to get round, so I followed her for a bit, but the que out side was building up, so the security gard ask the lady to step aside so I could go in front, she didn't look happy.

Averyyounggrandmaofsix · 16/01/2021 17:42

There is a global pandemic out there, we are all in lockdown to protect the frail and elderly yet apparently its wrong to suggest they avoid places like supermarkets? I must be missing something.

user1472151176 · 16/01/2021 17:42

It sounds to me like they didn't need to walk side by side. They should have been walking single file to allow people to overtake. I don't see what their problem was.

VinylDetective · 16/01/2021 17:46

@Averyyounggrandmaofsix

There is a global pandemic out there, we are all in lockdown to protect the frail and elderly yet apparently its wrong to suggest they avoid places like supermarkets? I must be missing something.
We’re in lockdown to minimise pressure on the NHS, not to protect any group of people. That’s what you’re missing
ERFFER · 16/01/2021 17:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HappyBirthdayJC · 16/01/2021 17:54

You’d overtake a slow moving vehicle while driving so why not overtake a slow moving person while walking?

YANBU

Arobase · 16/01/2021 17:55

If you read OPs posts, she was the one looking for a fight.

Nonsense. If she'd been looking for a fight, she would hardly have refrained from answering back, would she?

Arobase · 16/01/2021 17:57

We’re in lockdown to minimise pressure on the NHS, not to protect any group of people. That’s what you’re missing

And maybe we could achieve that if people related to or caring for vulnerable individuals did their shopping for them rather than shuffling slowly around busy places with them.

Chimeraforce · 16/01/2021 17:57

Op. Yanbu.

Arobase · 16/01/2021 17:59

You really think the OP did absolutely nothing wrong and someone shouted at her for absolutely no reason? Having been in this situation plenty of times, I've met plenty of faux innocents like the OP.

And yet, @MintyMabel, you seem unable to answer the question what precisely is so wrong with someone in a hurry passing by another shopper when there is space to do so safely.

funinthesun19 · 16/01/2021 18:01

Why should you have waited? It’s not like you barged them out of the way when you walked past so you caused them no harm whatsoever.

The woman must have thought she and the elderly woman were more important than anyone else if she expected people to wait behind them. People don’t always have time to wait for others, and if it’s possible then you overtake people! Does she apply this logic to when she’s walking slowly on the pavements too? People would be waiting all day!
Of course it’s not rude to overtake.

AlexisCarringtonColbyDexter · 16/01/2021 18:02

@Arobase

We’re in lockdown to minimise pressure on the NHS, not to protect any group of people. That’s what you’re missing

And maybe we could achieve that if people related to or caring for vulnerable individuals did their shopping for them rather than shuffling slowly around busy places with them.

I agree. I think the last place an elderly frail person should be is in the supermarket in the middle of a pandemic with a virus that puts older people at particular risk of dying or needing hospital treatment.