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AIBU?

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Original poster

Group on FB

309 replies

UnshakenNeedsStirring · 10/01/2021 14:00

So I joined a group of women on FB. To support each other during lockdown and generally have a chat and a nice time online. Ater a week or so the admin changed a photo of the group to one with 5 women holding hands, the pic was taken from back, so no faces. IT was a painting or so from 50's I think or could've been done in retro style. I pointed out that the picture was not inclusive as it was only showing white women and didn't have other women of colour or ethnic minorities. I got a lot of abuse back. Was I wrong? I am a bit shocked and disheartened that in 2021 I had to raise this and no one really was bothered and nearly all the women asked me to shut up and not talk about it

OP posts:
mewkins · 10/01/2021 20:25

Good on you for pointing it out. It IS important that you do because white=default so often. I'm surprised at the response of this thread. If it were a group or a website for kids would everyone think it was OK to just feature white children? And it doesn't matter that kids of other ethnic groups feel once again left out and invisible? Is that really ok?

Original poster
UnshakenNeedsStirring · 10/01/2021 20:27

:lookingformyleopard I was surprised too. First FB now mumsnet. Sigh

OP posts:
Original poster
UnshakenNeedsStirring · 10/01/2021 20:27

@mewkins Thanks lovely

OP posts:
MyLifeWTF · 10/01/2021 20:30

@blueangel19 I am not judging, I'm just commenting back on what others have said....how much i would love for there to be no division.....unfortunately there is and it looks like it won't change while people still have these views that because it doesnt affect them its not important.

blueangel19 · 10/01/2021 20:32

Wowsers, this thread is a bit scary What do you mean scary? Are they threatening with murder?

lookingformyleopard · 10/01/2021 20:35

@blueangel19

Wowsers, this thread is a bit scary What do you mean scary? Are they threatening with murder?
No, just a bit of casual racism... Is that fine now?
LaceyBetty · 10/01/2021 20:39

This makes me so sad. I can (unfortunately) see myself having unthinkingly used a photo like what was used for the site, but would be nothing but thankful if it was pointed out to me that I was BU and that better alternatives were available. It is not virtue signalling, it is what must be done.

blueangel19 · 10/01/2021 20:43

No, just a bit of casual racism...
Is that fine now? You tell me?

Coulddowithanap · 10/01/2021 20:44

If the picture was similar to the one posted earlier then I can't see anything wrong.

Looneytune253 · 10/01/2021 20:44

I think I'm a member of this group. The photo has been reinstated

Lavanderrose · 10/01/2021 20:45

You were right to point it out, well done.

WeatherwaxOn · 10/01/2021 20:46

I think it was a perfectly fair point to raise. And I say that as a straight white woman. It would have been easy enough to find a more inclusive image.

nineniiiine · 10/01/2021 20:46

I've just dipped into MN for the first time in ages and think I'll be dipping right back out again. OP you weren't unreasonable, I'm genuinely saddened by the responses here.

Charley50 · 10/01/2021 20:48

I think you were right to raise it OP, and it's a shame you didn't get a more positive, thoughtful
response. On here too.

lookingformyleopard · 10/01/2021 20:49

@blueangel19

*No, just a bit of casual racism... Is that fine now?* You tell me?
I'm not entirely sure what you mean. It shouldn't be, surely? Or is this some alternate universe where the last few decades didn't happen?
Louiselouie0890 · 10/01/2021 20:50

Did it have plus size as well did it have a ginger a blonde and a brunette did it have short and tall, honestly

Original poster
UnshakenNeedsStirring · 10/01/2021 20:53

@nineniiiine thank you, yes, I was surprised at some of the nasty comments here

OP posts:
Original poster
UnshakenNeedsStirring · 10/01/2021 20:54

@Charley50 thank you!

OP posts:
Original poster
UnshakenNeedsStirring · 10/01/2021 20:54

@LaceyBetty thanks

OP posts:
Original poster
UnshakenNeedsStirring · 10/01/2021 20:56

@Louiselouie0890 all white, mostly blonde from what I remember, but wearing hats, so not too sure, happy?

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MNHQ
HebeMumsnet · 10/01/2021 20:56

Evening, everyone.

There are a lot of posts on this thread that we think tip into racism, and also many that are simply personal attacks or break our talk guidelines in other ways.

We'd often delete a thread with this many problematic posts but that felt a bit unfair on the OP, so we'd really like to ask everyone to have a look at our guidelines and think carefully about what they're posting.

While we can see the OP has asked for opinions, so clearly welcomes views from both sides, we don't think it's ok to suggest that anyone who questions a lack of diversty 'needs more to do' and that sort of thing, or that these issues are too 'trivial' somehow to be discussed.

We'd really like to get the thread back on track if possible. Thanks. Flowers

Original poster
UnshakenNeedsStirring · 10/01/2021 20:57

@spoonrace I got a lot of crap for raising , what I thought was a valid point.

OP posts:
roarfeckingroarr · 10/01/2021 20:58

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Original poster
UnshakenNeedsStirring · 10/01/2021 20:59

@WeatherwaxOn thank you

OP posts:
roarfeckingroarr · 10/01/2021 20:59

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