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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be disappointed in the toys aimed at girls?

217 replies

FrostedCranberries · 30/12/2020 13:12

My DD has a birthday coming up and shopping around for something aimed at her age group (5) I'm not very impressed.

Lego for girls is all in pink, Frozen or Troll themed. Theres makeup sets full of glitter and lipstick, LOL, bakery sets, hair dressing and baby crap. These are all toys in the aisle for girls.

The boys however have a choice of logical games, exciting Lego (police, vehicles and superheroes), coding games, building blocks, maths and science kits. Everything to get them ahead academically.

Why is this ok? And why isn't anyone doing anything about this? Are people really ok with raising their daughters to look pretty and be mummy first, whilst boys get a head start in problem solving leaving the girls to fall behind further perpetuating the stereotype that females are emotional and not logical?

I wanted to get her a lego police car to add to her box of legos but I felt a bit apprehensive as I wouldn't want her to not feel like she fits in with all the other girls.

OP posts:
Brefugee · 31/12/2020 13:44

some of us have been commenting on and fighting against this for a long long time.

And so often get told to STFU and girls can have pink glittery stuff if they want (missing the point)

So now my DCs are grown up, I'm leaving it up to everyone else because i can't be arsed with it any more.

Ilovemaisie · 31/12/2020 14:14

Brefugee to be honest though most toys shops don't display stuff by 'girls' toys or 'boys' toys. Signs like that in stores are mostly long gone. While toy manufacturers do still use a lot of pink in packaging for dolls or blue for cars but it never says 'for girls' or 'boys' on the box.
It's a load of nonsense. Kids play with whatever they want and generally no kids care what another kid is playing with. It's the parents that fall for the stereotyping nonsense.

AccidentallyOnPurpose · 31/12/2020 15:43

@Ilovemaisie

I bought the Lego Friends Ice Cream Cart from Aldi yesterday. Out of 97 pieces only 12 are pink. Soooo disappointed. I thought this was meant to be the 'pink' range. Although it is a least encouraging girls to become ice cream sellers - isn't it usually a job done by a certain MR Whippy or a bloke called Mario ? (Sarcastic Grin)
DD's dream job atm is to become an ice cream seller with her own van.Grin
FoxinaScarf · 31/12/2020 15:51

Lego for girls is not pink.
There is pink Lego and it can be for girls or boys.
Lego for girls comes in all colours, there is great space Lego.
OP it is you who has decided Frozen stuff, hairdressing etc is just for girls. It isn't - it is for girls and boys.
Let your child choose what she wants to play with and don't label it for girls or boys.

FoxinaScarf · 31/12/2020 15:55

@QuantumJump

I agree with you OP - it's really annoying. As others have said you are free to ignore it, but why should you have to ignore it? Why is it that way in the first place?

It makes me really cross Angry

You don't have to ignore anything. It's not annoying. Pink Lego or Frozen things are not only for girls. You have just decided it is. It's just stuff, there is no rule about who it is aimed for or who can play with it. Just because there is a pink toy there is no need to find it annoying and make assumptions about who it is aimed at. Pink is just a colour that happened to be popular for boys in Victorian times but now can be for girls too.
Wtfdidwedo · 31/12/2020 15:58

I bought my daughters firefighter and doctor Barbies, plain Lego and Duplo boxes, a drill set and a football. I wasn't aware I was only allowed to purchase items from the pink aisle for them, whoops.

Hedgemoon · 31/12/2020 15:59

Try finding a craft set for a child interested in cars or dinosaurs or space! They are pretty much exclusively pink, butterflies, trolls, hearts. I just want to be able to buy a £3 craft kit at The Range for my child that they will be excited about.

Marmite27 · 31/12/2020 16:00

I hate the gendered stuff. If there’s a normal version and a pink version I naturally buy the normal one.

However my girls have strong opinions of their own so we have Lego friends, a pink kidizoom and my little pony.

We also have loads of jigsaws, logic puzzles, hot wheels, normal Lego and trains.

Marmite27 · 31/12/2020 16:02

One of their favourite toys is Magformers. Traditionally marketed to boys.

They also really really like fucking glitter glue Angry

BringPizza · 31/12/2020 16:37

OP, if your DD has asked for something then buy it for her. Don't try to shape or guide her. Life is too short to get het up about Frozen toys being in the girls toys aisle. If you don't like them (and your DD doesn't like them) then simply walk past them.

CardoMondo · 31/12/2020 16:39

Just get her stuff you want to get her! Don’t look at it as boys and girls toys.

TheGoogleMum · 31/12/2020 16:39

Please buy your daughter the toy she will enjoy not the toy the shop thinks she will like! The stereotyping of toys is awful at the moment. Lego in particular is for everyone :) (so are all toys though as they are not operated with genitals). It won't help with lego but I hear aldi and lidl are good at marketing toys in a more gender neutral way

Ilovemaisie · 31/12/2020 16:58

AccidentallyOnPurpose that's a good career choice. Doesn't matter what is happening in the world - people will always want ice cream.

Whatsnewpussyhat · 31/12/2020 17:33

The best lego ice cream van by far was the ice cream machine that turned into a fighter plane from the first lego movie. It was white and pink though even though it wasn't even a friend set! The pink lego escaped. 😄

MaudHatter · 31/12/2020 17:34

I’ve never bought my daughter a toy from the ‘girls aisle ‘ in my life . Buy her the trains and cars and Lego . Just standard Lego not the pink stuff . Give her opportunities to play with a wide variety of toys . Some girls do however like all the pink stuff and that’s fine as long as they know they can play wi the whatever they want .

MaudHatter · 31/12/2020 17:36

We also talked about the dolls aisle , the car aisle ,Lego aisle etc . Don’t separate them and perhaps she won’t either .

Whatsnewpussyhat · 31/12/2020 17:39

Just standard Lego not the pink stuff

Pink lego is standard lego. It comes it many colours. Pink lego bricks pre date lego friends. It's as daft as saying you won't buy green lego.

Ilovemaisie · 31/12/2020 17:46

Whatsnewpussyhat oh yes I have that ice cream van from the first film. Haven't built it for a while. I think I might get it out and see what else I can convert it to !!

Biancadelrioisback · 31/12/2020 17:55

Unless the toy aisle say "boy toys" and "girl toys", it is the consumer who is deciding which set of toys are for who.

Whatsnewpussyhat · 31/12/2020 18:03

I think I might get it out and see what else I can convert it to

Mine got mixed with Elsa's ice castle to become a 2 story ice cream parlour/coffee shop for the lego friends Grin

shelbyrae · 31/12/2020 18:04

IME there are a lot of non-gendered educational games and toys for kids out there. I also feel there is sometimes an implicit bias against traditionally girls' toys and interests for being stupid or unnecessary - dress up kits and dolls and Frozen stuff are valid toys just like "boys'" cars and action figures. It's just a form of ingrained sexism imo (no judgment here btw).

But yeah in general I would just buy what your kids are interested in.

lalalalands · 31/12/2020 18:10

I agree with you OP. I was looking for a toy hoover for my little boy once and 90% of the products I found were pink and had specifically girls on the packaging Angry

Stellaroses · 31/12/2020 19:11

As many have already said - it’s unlikely to find a shop or brand that says ‘For girls’ on it, so have a think about why you think the things you’ve mentioned are for girls. The pink? If so it’s a bit ridiculous that you think the colour means it’s only for girls.
Or were you online and clicked a “girls” section or googled “for girls” - if so then it’s you who’s gendering toys.

Just think about what you think she’d like, and get it.

PowerslidePanda · 31/12/2020 20:01

I was the only girl in my entire college who chose to study Physics. The only girl who chose to study Computing. The only girl who went on to do an engineering degree.

But all the STEM toys in the world wouldn't have led me to those choices, had my parents had raised me to believe that what was important was "fitting in with all the other girls" Hmm

stayathomer · 01/01/2021 00:26

There's a lot of people saying it's the person's perception that makes it a girl or boy's toy- just going on my example above where I was talking about it being difficult for my ds to find craft sets- if it has pink packaging, a picture of 2 girls playing with it and the thing they're making is either make up or a hand bag, it's a given most boys will walk by. In the same way, the slime kits etc have blue packaging and 2 boys on the front so chances are most girls will walk by. Toy companies do seem to be getting better on it all though, a lot of things now have a boy and girl on the front