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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not think I should have to thank them

305 replies

Tellmelies65 · 27/12/2020 15:17

I went on a walk to the supermarket earlier and came Across a group of people talking on a pavement. They were outside a house clearly talking to the person who lived in the house. They moved as I approached them and then the woman shouted thank you at me.
I’m not a rude person but I don’t think you should have to thank someone when they are on a pavement.

OP posts:
WhatKatyDidNxt · 27/12/2020 16:41

I wouldn’t have said thanks. They’re blocking the pavement, why thank someone for stopping doing something annoying Hmm

Thewinterofdiscontent · 27/12/2020 16:43

I’m with you Op. they were blocking the way - they should move regardless.
It’s also quite aggressive to scream “thank you” at someone, you don’t demand manners off someone. Which is why the Op posted.It’s almost like strangers starting a fight with over fuck all.

thevassal · 27/12/2020 16:44

@Givemeabreak88

I’m with the op , I think it’s more rude to stand and block a Pavement so people can’t get past without having to ask you to move.
OP didn't have to ask them to move, though? They did so without having to be asked. Which was why they were expecting to be thanked.

I would have thought you were rude too, although I wouldn't have shouted at you.

I don't get the attitude of people like OP, or drivers who don't bother acknowledging you when you let them out/pass, or similar. It's like a 'thanks' is an abjectly bodily exhausting, mentally tiring, huge effort that costs them their own money or shortens their life span or something. Like @HumphreyGoodmanswife and other posters said - saying thank you is just one of life's automatic little life smoothers - it doesn't cost you ANYTHING so why not just do it??? It doesn't mean admitting to fault, or saying you were wrong and they right, it's just a basic social nicety most normal people don't even bother to think about, they just do!

I can't imagine how exhausting it must be to live your life constantly stressing about whether or not you should bother to thank someone, or who is in the right or wrong over pavement owning or right of way, rather than just automatically uttering a basic social nicety (and god forbid an accompanying smile) at fellow humans during what is supposed to be the 'good will to all mankind' time of year!

MRex · 27/12/2020 16:45

They moved, so they weren't blocking the pavement at all. Saying thank you is expected as basic politeness in that situation, OP was rude.

kowari · 27/12/2020 16:47

@Tellmelies65

Maybe I should have said thank you but I will admit the whole of my walk to the supermarket was of people stopping on the pavement people riding bikes on the pavement so by the point to be honest I had had enough. I had already had to walk on the road due to another group standing talking on the pavement.
They did the right thing and moved. You did the wrong thing in not saying thank you, it's just common courtesy.

Perfectly fine to chat on the pavement as long as you are not oblivious to others and move to let people past. The first group of people were in the wrong, but that had nothing to do with the second group, they were not blocking the pavement as they moved for you.

JoeCalFuckingZaghe · 27/12/2020 16:49

@Tellmelies65

Maybe I should have said thank you but I will admit the whole of my walk to the supermarket was of people stopping on the pavement people riding bikes on the pavement so by the point to be honest I had had enough. I had already had to walk on the road due to another group standing talking on the pavement.
Surely witnessing such rude behaviour as the group who didn’t move (you could have asked them to btw) would mean you would want to express gratitude to those who did move? As they’ve acknowledged they were in your way and moved to accommodate you...

You were quite rude tbh.

SleepingStandingUp · 27/12/2020 16:50

@Tellmelies65

SleepingStandingUp I would have said excuse me.
So if they'd have actually blocked your way you'd have used half manners (excuse me Vs excuse me please) rather than telling them to move, but because they moved without asking you didn't use your manners. Odd.
Lucindainthesky · 27/12/2020 16:50

I'm with you OP. They didn't do a "nice thing" by moving, they were blocking the pavement. Of course they should have moved and there was nothing to thank them for.

Marchitectmummy · 27/12/2020 16:52

Very rude not to thank them, from your tier comments it sounds like you were looking for a confrontation.

Calmandmeasured1 · 27/12/2020 16:53

Tellmelies65

Maybe I should have said thank you
Yay! The message is finally starting to get through. (Nicer if you were definite though).

ruthieness · 27/12/2020 16:55

I would like to demonstrate my good manners and hereby thank everyone and anyone who has not murdered me -
a common law offence

Obstructing the pavement - part of the highway is in fact also an offence which is why demonstrators have to march up and down and not stand still!

The rude person was the person requiring thanks for obeying the law and making a stressful situation for you - as you had to anticipate what to do to accommodate their lawbreaking.

but to be authentically "British" you should have apologised for your existence "Sorry" as in "Sorry you have to consider other people you selfish gits!"

Oysterbabe · 27/12/2020 16:56

You should have said thanks. They weren't doing anything wrong seeing as they moved straight out of the way when you needed to pass. There are some really grumpy fuckers around.

blueluce85 · 27/12/2020 16:56

Do you acknowledge and thank someone who lets you go past in your car, even if it is your right of way?? I do, I see no difference in this situation.

There is no law on what is and isn't allowed on the pavement with regards to pedestrians, they didn't have to move for you, they chose to, a simple thanks costs nothing, or even a simple smile.

You were rude!!

Chloemol · 27/12/2020 16:57

They moved. You say thank you. You were rude

Shr1881 · 27/12/2020 16:59

You should’ve said thank you and you know it. That’s why you’re here after all 😂

whatshalliget · 27/12/2020 17:03

Not rude not to say thank you. Maybe more gracious to say it depending on context and how much eye contact there was, but not rude not to say it.

Batshit rude of the lady to shout thank you at you.

If that had been me and you hadn’t said thank you OP, I would not have noticed. In fact it happened to us the other day - man had to get past us on the pavement so we shifted over. I didn’t register his face let alone whether he said thank you or not and could not care less.

This is just one of those aibu threads where lots of people take pleasure in sanctimoniously trying to make the OP feel like shit.

dealornodealer · 27/12/2020 17:03

I'm with you op. If they were blocking the pavement to have a chat they have to move to let you past anyway. I probably would have said thank you by habit but wouldn't expect a sarcastic response if I didn't. They shouldn't have been blocking a public right of way in the first place.

BrumBoo · 27/12/2020 17:05

so by your logic, I should never have to thank anyone who holds a door open for me, as I have to go through it anyway, or say thanks to shop staff, as I have to do my shopping and that’s what they get paid for?

That's not the same thing as the op in the slightest. Its rude to loiter and cause an obstruction on the pavement. It was up to the obstructors to both move and apologies for being in the way. The op could then acknowledge this with 'That's ok' or even a 'thank you', but it's not necessary as they were only using the pavement as intended (to get from one place to another). It's not the op's fault they interrupted someone's nice little chat doing so.

I bet half the people women on this thread pepper their language 'sorry' over everything as well.

Original poster
Tellmelies65 · 27/12/2020 17:08

I also think the woman’s nature was clearly not very nice if she felt the need to shout after me.

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 27/12/2020 17:14

and apologies for being in the way.

They ensured that they were never in the way.

I bet half the people women on this thread pepper their language 'sorry' over everything as well.

What is that meant to mean?

SoupDragon · 27/12/2020 17:14

This thread shows how common courtesy has vanished over the years.

Twinkie01 · 27/12/2020 17:17

If someone has to move out of the way for you wherever you are and they are it's polite to say thank you. I can't understand why you'd think it wasn't.

HopeTheHeraldAngelsSing · 27/12/2020 17:23

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ on request of its author.

Ginfordinner · 27/12/2020 17:23

If someone has to move out of the way for you wherever you are and they are it's polite to say thank you. I can't understand why you'd think it wasn't.

This ^^
Posters saying that the group were wrong to talk on the pavement - really?
Two wrongs don't make a right.

EckhartLolly · 27/12/2020 17:25

Just say thank you, it doesn't cost anything. Manners should not be rationed. Be nice, it's good for your own wellbeing.