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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DS came home drunk tonight

132 replies

DSCAMEHOMEDRUNK · 25/12/2020 00:13

I feel terrible. Like a fool I let him go out with his friends tonight and he has come home hammered. I can’t get much out of him as he is so out of it. He’s a mature 14 but hasn’t done anything like this before. What should I do?

OP posts:
Original poster
DSCAMEHOMEDRUNK · 25/12/2020 00:13

Sorry didn’t mean to enable voting

OP posts:
StrugglingICUnurse · 25/12/2020 00:15

Oh bless you. Try to get him to drink some water, get him to sleep on his side (with a bin or bucket by his bed, for vomit).

LeSangeEstDansLarbre · 25/12/2020 00:16

This is the sort of thing we all did once. The sensible ones, only once. It’s a learning experience. He will be punished enough by spending the night being sick, and feeling like a pig shat in his head all Christmas Day. You can talk to him once he’s compos mentis again about why it wasn’t a good idea, but by then he’ll be really aware of that fact.

Cocomarine · 25/12/2020 00:16

Not a mature 14yo then!
Are you asking what you should do now, from a safety point of view? Is he that drunk?
If not, force him to drink a pint of water, put him to bed, and tell him he’ll be getting the riot act on Boxing Day. Then enjoy Xmas Day.
Maybe stick paracetamol in his stocking?

LeSangeEstDansLarbre · 25/12/2020 00:17

@StrugglingICUnurse

Oh bless you. Try to get him to drink some water, get him to sleep on his side (with a bin or bucket by his bed, for vomit).
Oh yes, of course, in the immediate term, all this. If you wake up in the night I’d check on him, too.
Original poster
DSCAMEHOMEDRUNK · 25/12/2020 00:17

@Cocomarine

Not a mature 14yo then! Are you asking what you should do now, from a safety point of view? Is he that drunk? If not, force him to drink a pint of water, put him to bed, and tell him he’ll be getting the riot act on Boxing Day. Then enjoy Xmas Day. Maybe stick paracetamol in his stocking?
By mature I mean interested in adult things rather than more childish things. It’s hard to explain.
OP posts:
livefornaps · 25/12/2020 00:18

Sometimes it be like that.

SleepingStandingUp · 25/12/2020 00:19

Plenty of water, paracetamol if he will or leave some on his bedside table, bon for vomit and try to get him to sleep on his side.

Painkillers and water / pineapple juice tomorrow.

Big chat on Boxing Day. If he's contrite and suffered all Xmas Day I'm do fewer sanctions than if he's all bluff and swagger

He's a teenager, then do stupid crap. It isn't a reflection on you, or on him really.

TiersOnMyPillow · 25/12/2020 00:19

Tomorrow mornings banging head should put him off for a while.

Original poster
DSCAMEHOMEDRUNK · 25/12/2020 00:19

I more mean should I punish or should I just chalk up to experience and tell him not to do it again. Also yes thanks for the safety advice

OP posts:
SleepingStandingUp · 25/12/2020 00:20

Not a mature 14yo then! Well plenty of thrown adults do exactly the same stupid thing

Sparklesocks · 25/12/2020 00:21

Give him a lot of water and have a sick bucket by his head. If he’s able it also might help to have him eat some toast or something to help settle his stomach. And hope he isn’t a grouchy hungover mess in the morning!

Blondiney · 25/12/2020 00:22

Leave water for him but not painkillers.

Blondiney · 25/12/2020 00:23

Let him feel the misery of a hangover headache.

ScubaSteven · 25/12/2020 00:24

Ah OP, it happens, it's not a reflection on either of you. Just make sure he's safe as the other posters have suggested and then have a chat on Boxing Day. I wouldn't punish, he's trying to be a 'grown up', punishing will just encourage rebellion. I'd have a chat about how to avoid the dangers.

I work with teenagers and no amount of punishments work for this type of behaviour, it's a cry to be treated like an adult (as conflicting as that is!). The best thing to do is arm with information so he can make an informed choice next time, the hangover from this will help that decision along too I imagine.

AvoidingRealHumans · 25/12/2020 00:24

I think we've all done this even if not at 14yrs old. I would give him plenty of water to drink and a bucket to be sick in.
He will feel rotten tomorrow and I wouldn't be very sympathetic, hopefully the hangover puts him off for a while.

Feckmesideways · 25/12/2020 00:27

Leave water out, try and get him on his side and something to stop him rolling onto his back incase he chokes on his sick. Have a basin and towels on the floor, I’d keep a lamp on and check on him every now and then.

In the morning if you have any lucozade sport or something would be good.

Pieceofpurplesky · 25/12/2020 00:27

Make sure you wake him up nice and early

SleepingStandingUp · 25/12/2020 00:28

@Blondiney

Let him feel the misery of a hangover headache.
If he broke his leg prattling about with his mates would you refuse him pain-relief so he'd learn his lesson??
MsJaneAusten · 25/12/2020 00:31

Water. Bin by his bed. Lie him on his side. Lesson learnt.

WouldstrokeTomHardy · 25/12/2020 00:31

OP ignore the BELLENDS that say he's isn't a mature lad. Look after him and discuss later. Most of them won't have teens and any that do probably let them water a plant now and then.

Tippexy · 25/12/2020 00:32

What tier are you in? Confused

2,509 per 100,000!!

OhCaptain · 25/12/2020 00:35

Lots of water then up early tomorrow

ForeverBubblegum · 25/12/2020 00:38

Don't let in ruin Christmas, we've all been there when we were teenagers. Get him, toast if he'll eat, water weather or not he wants it and some paracetamol for the morning then have a nice day tomorrow. Maybe a chat on boxing day, but I think it's good that he cam home, because he trusts you to look out for him even when he doesstupid things. If you come down too hard, the next time he's drunk, he'll try to hide it by staying out and possibly putting himself in danger. When I was a teen, the thing was to say you were sleeping at X friends house, then pass out drunk under a tree somewhere. Looking back we were so lucky nothing terrible happened.

NannyGythaOgg · 25/12/2020 00:40

I was 15 the first time I did it.

One of my kids did it at 14 the other was 16 (but way more drunk). He has got home safely, the hangover may be its own consequence but he may not have one. Bed, on his side, with a bucket handy and a glass of water. It may be the first, it's unlikely to be the last. Understanding non judgemental chat about learning limits and how to recognise when to stop will have more effect than censure I suspect.