DS came home drunk tonight

[DSCAMEHOMEDRUNK]

I feel terrible. Like a fool I let him go out with his friends tonight and he has come home hammered. I can’t get much out of him as he is so out of it. He’s a mature 14 but hasn’t done anything like this before. What should I do?

[quote Wheresmykimchi]@jessstan1* do you have more than one person using your account ? I ask as I checked back through your posts as I was sure you have said many times you don't have children to find you are 40, 70, have no children yet a daughter and a son who is semi famous....@MNHQ* ??[/quote]
Reported for troll hunting.

Don't let him lie in! He is forced to get up with rest of family and eat breakfast etc however shite he feels!

Teens will be teens and do stupid things as they learn to transition to adults.

The best lesson is to teach him that it's not ok for his stupid behaviour to have a negative effect on others in a family.

Chalk it up as experience ! He will be suffering and it may well stop him drinking a lot in the future ! My son did this but he was 17 at the time ! And he hardly drinks at all x

Good he got home safe - make sure he knows the risks of alchohol and the risks of being out pissed .
Being mugged or attacked .

My DS threw up on the bathroom floor once ( cider on an empty stomack the pillock) I told him if there's a Next Time then he cleans it !

Oh no poor you both!

I don’t think you should punish him. Hopefully his hangover will do that! I agree with PPs who said to talk to him about safety. He probably won’t be able to listen on Christmas Day in the thick of a hangover so maybe talk to him when the dust has settled.

I started drinking at 14, all my peer group did. I couldn’t handle it (of course) and threw up everywhere. My parents (somehow) managed to see the funny side. They also said they were ok with it as long as I didn’t hide anything - so I didn’t. I’ve never had a problem with drink or gotten into any trouble drinking. Starting that early was just the way I could fit in with my friends at that age! It’s not ideal, but that’s the way it was.

At 40, I don’t really drink anymore because I don’t much care for it.

Try and go easy on him today. Poor sod.

Banana and Nutella/peanut butter on toast is supposed to be good. Having done this myself when not much older, a hangover on Christmas Day will be punishment enough! Plus the guilt, especially if you also have younger children.

Paracetamol
Water
A stern word
Shit happens
We all did this

@londonscalling

I'm more interested to know why you let him out with mates during a pandemic!

Yes OP. LOCK HIM UP. A pandemic = no fun. The Mumsnet fascists are watching you.

Do my let him sleep in today - make him get up and be nice today, talk him for a walk etc.

I did this at 14, trust me the hangover was enough punishment

I'm pretty straight laced high achiever and once got totally wasted at about 12 or 13. Wasn't the best thing to do but I learned my lesson and didn't touch alcohol again for years. I would have a discussion with him on boxing day, talk about why he chose to get drunk. How will he avoid a situation like that in future. If he has a sensible discussion about it I'd just take it as a learning opportunity but let him know if he keeos doing it you'll lose your trust in him and then there would need to be more consequences.

@DSCAMEHOMEDRUNK

I more mean should I punish or should I just chalk up to experience and tell him not to do it again. Also yes thanks for the safety advice

Chalk it up to experience.

Crank up the Xmas tunes and force him to be Merry!!

I'm another saying don't punish or judge him.
I was the parent who got called at one o'clock in the morning to pick up my DS and friend when sleepover fell through. They hadn't been drinking but wandering the streets. The other kids scared of parents reaction.
My DS knew he could count on me.
He doesn't drink yet but I'm not naive. It will happen when older. I'll say don't mix drinks, don't drink spirits and knock your drink over if you're not sure what's been put in it. Also I'll always pick you and anyone else up at any time or pay for a cab.

How was he today OP?

Don't let him lie in! He is forced to get up with rest of family and eat breakfast etc however shite he feels!

This. It happened and it's good that he felt save enough to come up / trusts you.

But I wouldn't make allowances for him either.

Nor give him painkillers.

They do stupid things. Watch over him tonight. Have a discussion tomorrow about drinking sensibly.

My DS when 16 got extremely drunk once - problem was he was as right as rain the next day - no after effects or hangover unfortunately. He's never done it again however.

DS2 did similar at 16. He’s 19 now and hasn’t drunk alcohol since. During “normal” times if he goes out with friends he’ll be the one driving.

He didn’t need punishing. The hangover from hell taught him a very valuable lesson!

@londonscalling

I'm more interested to know why you let him out with mates during a pandemic!

Why? Why are you more interested in this? What does this have to do with you? What are you going to do about it, if op turns out to be in tier 4 USE CAPITAL LETTERS TO TELL THE OP OFF? Call the Covid police?

MookieB1

Wheresmykimchi

@jessstan1 do you have more than one person using your account ? I ask as I checked back through your posts as I was sure you have said many times you don't have children to find you are 40, 70, have no children yet a daughter and a son who is semi famous....**@MNHQ ??

Reported for troll hunting.
..........

Thank you MookieB1 but I think the poster is genuinely confusing me with someone else because she or someone else said similar on another thread. Nobody else uses my account to my knowledge and I would hardly think I am interesting enough to 'hack'.

FTR I am nearly seventy one and have one child, a son aged 41. The only thing that rings familiar is the 'semi-famous' bit which I may have said lightheartedly because he is a musician (I've actually said that a few times), well known in the 'industry' but definitely not a household name. I'm pretty sure nobody here would have heard of him.

End of me here,
apart from saying that is the son whom I said did the same as the op's son at the same age. I don't think it is at all unusual. Mine has hardly drank as an adult. I can remember getting plastered as a teenager too, we can't always gauge our capacity.

I hope the op's son is OK today. When I did it as a teenager a couple of times I had no hangover, neither did son, but once I got past twenty I had awful hangovers after one or two drinks which is probably why I've never taken to booze much.

Hopefully he slept it off and is enjoying the day with the family.

Thanks @Mookie81

@jessstan1 in case it got missed I did apologise. I'd confused a quoted post. Il apologise again just in case.

[quote Wheresmykimchi]@jessstan1 in case it got missed I did apologise. I'd confused a quoted post. Il apologise again just in case.[/quote]
No worries Wheresmykimchi, nothing to apologise for but thank you.

Good tip @Cuddling57 about knocking the drink over. I also used a tip my mum gave me which was to drink from bottles as you can keep your thumb over it to prevent anything being put in it (unfortunately when I did have a pint something was slipped in) and you can also pretend to take sips without people noticing you arent drinking anything at all. Helpful if you want to slow down or dont want to drink but are around people who might pressure you.

@Wheresmykimchi

Thanks *@Mookie81*

Sorry, it just annoys me when people drag up old posts to try and catch people out. Apologies and have a good Boxing Day (what's left!).