To share or not to share Secret Santa Scratchcard Winnings

[WoolieLiberal]

I was given a National Lottery Scratchcard as a Secret Santa gift. I thought this was a bit naff until I realised it was a winner.

I won a (low end) four figure sum. I got excited and told my colleagues.

Since then, the person who gave it to me sent me a message suggesting (in a lighthearted way) that I might want to give her half. I replied with a laugh emoji as I thought she was joking, but she has since messaged me to ask if I have decided whether I am going to do so or not!

I’ve also been asked by three other colleagues if I could “lend” them “small“ (three Figure) amounts “to help with Christmas”.

DH says I was daft to have told anyone, but it’s done now and is none of anyone else’s business. He says I should treat myself for a Change.

I’m beginning to wish I hadn’t won anything because if I respond to all requests I’ll have virtually nothing left, and if I don’t, then I’ll be thought badly of and stingy.

There’s a woman at work who works part time and is married to a very wealthy businessman (the job is more of a hobby/something to do) and they’re always jetting off on holidays to far flung destinations, having meals out, nice cars and jewellery etc. No one has ever (to my knowledge) asked her to share her wealth.

If I knew a colleague was genuinely struggling I would help but this feels like vultures are circling. DH, DD’s and I are not wealthy by any stretch but “managing”.

Thoughts welcome!!

In normal times I would have treated my colleagues to a celebration evening out in the new year. Don't give them half! I think that's because you're feeling guilty for some reason. Are they sharing their gifts with you? The giver has no more 'right' to any of the money than anyone else. If you really want, buy her a ticket back!

OP it was a gift!

Your secret Santa would have received a gift too and presumably she isn't being asked or part of it back!

As others said I might have been inclined to give her something but not when she has asked twice. Just say "I'll buy you a drink next time we're out"

What was the secret Santa limit and what else did she get you? Doesn't sound like it was a generous gift but you got lucky

What a begrudging shower of cadgers you work with! Can't see someone having a stroke of luck without feeling entitled. It's not a life-changing amount so just enjoy it and buy yourself something nice.

Don't split it. They are despicable! What a horrible bunch of vultures, they don't deserve anything from you. I'm sorry they have taken the shine off your win.

I’d split 50/50 with the gift giver and nothing for the others.
Very cheeky of the giver to suggest you do that though. I would naturally split with them but them suggesting I should would irk me

This thread is perfect Christmas fodder for the Daily Fail.

Betcha!

Keep it and put it towards a lovely holiday for when this is all over.

Don't split it! Do they share their windfalls, eg inheritances etc?

"Sorry, we have a big expense coming up and I was worried sick about how to pay it. I can't afford to give any away."

That’s absolutely ridiculous.

If you want to give £50 or £100 to the person who gifted it to you, fine. It’s a nice gesture, but even that is going way overboard imo - you could buy her 10 scratch cards and you’ll have given her ten times what she gave you!

If you want to share a small portion with everyone else, fine - I don’t know how many people there are in the team but £25 each is plenty. However, again, this is entirely out of the bounds of what could reasonably be expected.

I think you really ought to think about why you are falling all over yourself to please the CF, grabby people you work with, rather than using that money for things that could make an actual difference to you, your family or other people you care about and have an actual responsibility to.

This has probably been said but it's Secret Santa. How can you be certain who gave it to you?

Why would you be giving any to the rest of the team?

Op don't share this with anyone in your workplace. The scratchcard was a gift and as someone said above, those are the risks you take. If the person had given you a box of Milk Tray, would he/she expect the top later and you the bottom? Keep it and enjoy it. It is YOUR money and no one elses.

@Pantheon

I think it's yours to do what you want with!

This.

I would wager the value of your scratchcard that those cheeky fuckers who are expecting something wouldn't share any winnings out themselves.

Dont give them half! It was your present. You dont owe them anything. THEY are the ones being rude, it's entirely unacceptable behaviour. Are they saying it to you face to face? If they're messaging then just dont answer. They wont have the balls to ask you for money in front of everyone else because its downright greedy and appalling behaviour.

OP, look at it like this. If you were given a box of chocolates, would you keep half and then share the rest out between the team? Use half a tub of body lotion and then share the rest?

I would just tell everyone that all the requests for monetary gifts and loans are very funny but the joke's wearing a bit thin now so could they leave it. And then never mention it again.

This is why i avoid giving scratch cards as gifts, when i do (teen stockings) I always buy the low value ones, definitely no more than £1k top prize because i know I’d be gutted beyond belief if i bought it and the recipient won big!

Give away half?? No chance. The giver was being a lazy sod by doing the cop out gift of a scratch card which has massively back fired and bitten them on the ass! Tough luck to them. Bet you all the winnings they wouldn’t be sharing if it was them.

Is everyone else sharing their secret Santa? You can use a scarf 4 days a month, have 2 scoops of hot chocolate and 3 posh biscuits, a few people got socks so one sock each, and the photo frame you can have for 10 days throughout the year.

Until Mumsnet I'd never known about people sharing winnings. I've never been to bingo, but I've been to the races (with a family member in a hospitality package, I was too young to place my own bets!)
I've bought lottery tickets and scratch cards as gifts before, never thought they owed me from it. I can add to my list of things I've learned from Mumsnet, don't tell anyone if I win anything!

I would buy a one pound scratch cards and put it in a sealed envelope. Then get enough envelopes for everyone in the SS draw. Put a scratch card sized piece of paper inside each one. Randomly number the envelopes. Put the envelopes in a box.

Tell your colleagues they are all eligible to join in your free New Year Lucky Colleague Dip. all they have to do is send you a stamped addressed envelope and you will send them one of your —possibly— lucky envelopes.

That way they all get the excitement of taking part

The possibility of being a winner

The realisation that getting a winning scratch card is a chance event

@WoolieLiberal you're crazy. Keep it all! This is the reason I didn't use scratch cards as a wedding favour, I would have been a bit resentful if someone won the jackpot 😂 and we had already spent a load on our favours.

The gifter would not have told you if you hadn't won and you would have been down a present from the secret Santa, she wouldn't have replaced your lack of winnings with a gift, so she can do one.

If she hadn't asked, I may have tried to find out who it was and give £100 but as she has, I think you need to learn to say "no" it can go into a savings account for your children or be used towards a family holiday. 2k doesn't go very far these days.

Why split it? It's your money.

She gifted it to you, she's really fucking cheeky asking for 1/2. Would she share a bath set she got? No.

Op it was unkind to tell people when they are struggling. I would give the Secret Santa £500 and keep the rest.

If you feel the need to do something, which clearly you do, buy them each a scratch card.

Don’t give any of it away ffs
Buy each of them a £1 scratch card , give the person who bought you it a bottle of fizz, and keep the rest!