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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To put a note asking them to move their car?

254 replies

Openalltheadvent · 20/12/2020 15:10

It’s been outside our house for 4/5 weeks. I don’t know who it belongs too. I resisted at first in case they were isolating but it’s bugging me now. Especially as it gets towards Christmas, we will be coming from parents house with a car load of presents and we keep having to park far up the road. We have a 3 year old dd. Just to say, I don’t think the space is ours but think it’s inconsiderate leaving it outside someone else’s house for so long?!

YABU - it’s a free country, get over it
YANBU - leave a polite note on the car

OP posts:
Original poster
Openalltheadvent · 21/12/2020 19:28

But this scenario means I have to cross the road often.
I ask again @Dawnlassie @QueenoftheAir, what is the difference?
It is inconsiderate to park on pavement but not to park outside someone’s house for 5 weeks because ‘it’s not illegal’? I don’t understand. I could be disabled for all they know, and can’t afford to move house and get a nice big drive (as is the situation with my neighbour, and also the reason why I never park outside her house).
People leave notes on cars that are on the pavement all the time, yet I have been shot down.
Illegal or not, this is just about common courtesy for other people (unless they are ill, injured, it is stolen ...etc etc).

OP posts:
QueenoftheAir · 21/12/2020 19:34

But this scenario means I have to cross the road often

Oh, now you're splitting hairs, OP. You know there's a difference between crossing a road simply to get from one side to the other, and being forced to walk along the road because there is no room on the pavement for you to walk, push a pram, or move in a wheelchair.

You asked a question. Posters understand your frustration, but most are pointing out that the car is parked legally, and you would be unreasonable to expect the owner to move it, simply so you can park directly outside your house.

TheresNothingIWantMore · 21/12/2020 19:37

It isn't inconsiderate to park a car where its legal and not causing an obstruction. Parking on a pavement causes an obstruction, that it why its different.

You expect them to leave their house and come and make a special trip to their car and move it just in case it happens to be inconvenient for someone. Where they move it to might be inconvenient for someone else - and someone else may take the original space seconds later so it would be of no benefit.

daisypond · 21/12/2020 19:45

You’re not allowed to park on the pavement. That’s why people leave notes for that.

AtlasPine · 21/12/2020 19:50

If you write a note, I’d suggest making sure it explains that you know you have no right to EXPECT them to move it, but appeal to their sense of kindness. Ask really nicely. Say ‘no problem if you’d rather not move - entirely your decision.’

Malin52 · 21/12/2020 20:01

Weird thing to get annoyed about. When I lived in London my car could often be parked in the same spot for weeks and weeks as I used it so rarely. Sometimes it would be outside my flat, other times it would have to be in the next street. Nobody would have even considered reporting it as abandoned!!

EbeneezerSnooze · 21/12/2020 21:14

Oh dear god the humanity. THE HUMANITY GODDAMIT.

Why dont they just think of the children.

ARRHRHHGHGHGHGHHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHHREIgherohgerohgreg98eh8hier

Geez why are people like this?
FWIW I don't have much of an opinion on the issue. I see why it's annoying and inconvenient especially traipsing down the street with shopping and a young child...in shitty weather, but it's not a huge deal and I'm sure OP isn't brooding by her window like a psycho. But Jesus, people are allowed to have a moan about things that are getting on their nerves, there's no need for people to get shitty.
Why give her the third degree about "how long it's acceptable to park for"? Why do you care 😂 it's not your problem so calm down and move on 🤷‍♀️

MatildaonaWaltzer · 21/12/2020 21:21

Is it a BMW, OP? Perhaps it's LaQ's husband disposing of more cars and you're now able to claim it as abandoned and take ownership.

gurglebelly · 21/12/2020 21:21

I get you OP. We are lucky enough to have a driveway for 2 cars, as are all houses on our street. But we have two houses (both of 4 people) with 14 cars between them - I know the can park where they like but they dump all the extra cars for months at time, and I'm sorry but they are complete CFs - there is absolutely no need for them to have so many extras that they never use

Doris86 · 21/12/2020 22:10

@Openalltheadvent

But this scenario means I have to cross the road often. I ask again *@Dawnlassie* *@QueenoftheAir*, what is the difference? It is inconsiderate to park on pavement but not to park outside someone’s house for 5 weeks because ‘it’s not illegal’? I don’t understand. I could be disabled for all they know, and can’t afford to move house and get a nice big drive (as is the situation with my neighbour, and also the reason why I never park outside her house). People leave notes on cars that are on the pavement all the time, yet I have been shot down. Illegal or not, this is just about common courtesy for other people (unless they are ill, injured, it is stolen ...etc etc).
If you were disabled you could apply to the council to get a disabled bay painted on the road outside your house.

Time to stop digging, and accept the vast majority here think YABU.

steff13 · 21/12/2020 22:16

Where I live (Ohio), you're technically not allowed to leave a car parked on a public road for an extended period of time. If someone calls and reports it, the police come out and put a sticker on it. If it hasn't moved in 72 hours, it gets towed to the impound. I'm surprised it's ok there.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 21/12/2020 23:26

Why not turn your frustration to action - start to talk to your council about putting in a Residents' Parking scheme. It's a good thing to do - put your energy to something productive. A Residents' Parking Scheme will cost you, but you'll be able to get justifiably annoyed, instead of unreasonably annoyed.

Just be prepared for the possibility that the owner of the car in question might also be a resident and, if so, will have a special extra dispensation to park there, over and above the legal right that they already have.

Where I live (Ohio), you're technically not allowed to leave a car parked on a public road for an extended period of time. If someone calls and reports it, the police come out and put a sticker on it. If it hasn't moved in 72 hours, it gets towed to the impound. I'm surprised it's ok there.

American streets and housing are completely different. There are loads of residential areas in the UK where there have been houses for decades (if not centuries) before cars were even invented - certainly before the average household would ever have one. We also have about a fifth of the population that you have and one 37th of the total land area....

cherish123 · 21/12/2020 23:39

While not illegal, it's very cheeky to leave your car in a residential street, clearly outside someone's house, for months.

cherish123 · 21/12/2020 23:40

*weeks

Friendofsadgirl · 21/12/2020 23:57

You can report an abandoned vehicle to your local council. I've done this before and a notice was stuck to the car asking the owner to get in touch with a deadline after which the car would be removed. After another couple of weeks it was gone.
gov.uk website

Charlie63849 · 22/12/2020 00:03

@cherish123

While not illegal, it's very cheeky to leave your car in a residential street, clearly outside someone's house, for months.
Why is it. The car is taxed and has a MOT. It can be left there legally for as long as they like. If you don’t like that then buy a house with a drive way.
ClaireP20 · 22/12/2020 00:07

@MaskingForIt

we will be coming from parents house with a car load of presents and we keep having to park far up the road. We have a 3 year old dd.

Breeding and being rampant consumerists doesn’t give you a free parking space. If you want to park by your front door, buy a house with a drive.

People in flats will have to carry their presents and children much further.

Feel better now?
ClaireP20 · 22/12/2020 00:13

YANBU. It's just rude. Leaving it for weeks. Don't bother with a note though.

Yeahnahmum · 22/12/2020 01:13

Report perhaps? Not sure to whom
Its plain weird is has been there for weeks on end
Withoug it being moved. Weird and rude that is...

Doris86 · 22/12/2020 08:35

@ClaireP20

YANBU. It's just rude. Leaving it for weeks. Don't bother with a note though.
Here we go again.

It would be rude to park in someone’s private drive. Please explaining why it is rude for someone who has paid their road tax and insurance to park on a public road?

lucywho123 · 22/12/2020 08:47

I get it OP. I live in a terraced house and it does irk me if someone parks directly outside mine as we all have one allocated parking space and then room outside for 2nd cars. I'm currently 7 months pregnant, and trying to lug shopping and baby stuff from further down the road is a pain. But I know I don't legally have any right so let it go.

I did however get annoyed that one car was left outside for weeks, so I left a note saying there would be workmen in the morning so could they move their car please. They did. There wasn't any workmen coming really Grin

Elai1978 · 22/12/2020 09:00

You’re not allowed to park on the pavement.

You are in most parts of the country.

You can report an abandoned vehicle to your local council.

It’s not abandoned if it’s taxed, insured and MOTd. The council won’t be interested.

MaMaD1990 · 22/12/2020 09:14

Love it when the OP fights back. YANBU, its a bloody cheek leaving your car for weeks on end and would irritate me. I'd go against the grain here and leave a polite note (you never know, they may see it!). Perhaps suggesting you 'switch' spaces. If they don't use the car that much, if at all, they should have a problem parking down the road.

MaMaD1990 · 22/12/2020 09:15

*shouldn't have a problem

Averyyounggrandmaofsix · 22/12/2020 09:21

OP they know you are not disabled because you would have a designated space outside your house if you were.

How do people without cars manage who have to walk with shopping and children from bus stops?

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