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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To put a note asking them to move their car?

254 replies

Openalltheadvent · 20/12/2020 15:10

It’s been outside our house for 4/5 weeks. I don’t know who it belongs too. I resisted at first in case they were isolating but it’s bugging me now. Especially as it gets towards Christmas, we will be coming from parents house with a car load of presents and we keep having to park far up the road. We have a 3 year old dd. Just to say, I don’t think the space is ours but think it’s inconsiderate leaving it outside someone else’s house for so long?!

YABU - it’s a free country, get over it
YANBU - leave a polite note on the car

OP posts:
SamMil · 20/12/2020 20:53

I don't think you are unreasonable to be annoyed and complain about it between yourselves (I do the same if someone parks in "my" spot outside the house!).

I do think you'd be unreasonable to leave a note though, if it's not an allocated space. They are just as entitled to park there as you, even if it's annoying.

daisypond · 20/12/2020 20:53

Like you say, it's just selfish.

It’s not selfish at all. It’s selfish to expect other people who are lawfully parked to move just because you want them to. There’s only one selfish person here, and it’s not the car owner.

QueenoftheAir · 20/12/2020 20:56

Yea I know this. We don’t always get a spot outside our house and I don’t bother about it. But this is not that situation

But it is, OP.

Or tell me, how often should this person move their car so they weren't being "selfish" ? Once a day? Once every two days?

How often should they move their car so you would consider them to be

the sort of person you are ?

NotPrude · 20/12/2020 21:00

This situation is exactly about not getting a spot outside your house. You literally moaned about having to walk down the road with your child and your shopping, and how it’s going to be annoying with the Christmas gifts...

It’s a street filled with terraced houses. I would get it if the houses were more separated but it’s a terraced street. People will park wherever they can get a space. And keep their car as long as they wish.

Doris86 · 20/12/2020 21:07

I think the consensus here is YABVU.

Barton10 · 20/12/2020 21:08

We had this and it was stolen and had been abandoned I reported it to the Local Authority and it was moved.

StanfordPines · 20/12/2020 21:09

I don’t know why people keep saying ‘this is normal for terraced houses’. Yea I know this. We don’t always get a spot outside our house and I don’t bother about it. But this is not that situation...so I don’t see it’s relevance

So if every day it was a different car parked outside your house that would be ok?
The inconvenience would be the same.

It’s annoying, but I have to say that when I lived in a terrace I never noticed which car was parked outside my house, simply if there was a space or not.

Doris86 · 20/12/2020 21:21

I used to rent a terraced house with on street parking. Yes it could be annoying if I couldn’t park near my house, especially when returning home from the weekly shop with the boot full of groceries.

However I would never have dreamt of complaining about it or leaving a note on anyone’s car. I knew the situation when I moved on. I just made sure when I bought a house that I got one with a driveway.

Preparefortheflaming · 20/12/2020 21:24

I get that it would be irritating but you have no right to be moaning about it. People will park where they can get a space. Where should all the 2 car households park their 2nd car? Outside someone elses house probably. It's just the way it is. Parking is not reserved per household unless a driveway is present. Get used to it or move.

Brighterthansunflowers · 20/12/2020 21:28

YABU

It’s a public road, anyone can park there as long as they do so legally.

There’s a pandemic going on, lots of people are staying at home more than ever, not unreasonable to not move their car just because it’s outside your house.

If you want to always be able to park right outside your house then you’ll need to live somewhere with a driveway or designated parking space.

OhMsBeliever · 20/12/2020 21:30

My car is currently parked at my boyfriends. I was out with him when I fell and broke my arm. Obviously I can't drive for a few weeks so had to leave it there. He's not insured on it and it's not like I need here so it will have to stay there till I'm cleared to drive again. There's probably someone annoyed it's there as parking is sometimes difficult, but it's legally parked so nothing they can do.

Remaker · 20/12/2020 21:31

In the last month of my pregnancy I was put on strict bed rest for high BP. DH always caught the bus to work and was a bit busy working ft, preparing for our baby’s arrival and looking after me to be moving the car constantly in case we were inconveniencing the neighbours. What a lovely surprise it was when we were heading to hospital to give birth to find a rude note telling me I was selfish and had no right to park outside someone else’s house. Newsflash I had every right! After that the person continued their vendetta and would let down my tyres at every opportunity, regardless of where I parked or for how long. Wonderful when you have a newborn.

OP, maybe they are sick. Or have a very sick relative. Don’t add to their stress by assuming they are being inconsiderate.

movingonup20 · 20/12/2020 21:55

I sometimes don't drive my car for 3 weeks, yabu

Original poster
Openalltheadvent · 20/12/2020 22:07

@Remaker well obviously that is VU and I would never do that! I said ‘polite note’.
But it’s clear I shouldn’t do that as I don’t know their circumstances. I will just quietly seethe about it and continue to look for a house with a drive. If only we could all just move at a drop of a hat ey!

OP posts:
QueenPaws · 20/12/2020 22:14

My neighbours car has been parked outside my window for 2 years... it's got bloody moss growing on it! Nothing I can do, he can't/doesn't drive any more and has just left the car there

TokenGinger · 20/12/2020 22:35

I feel for you, OP.

I do have a drive, but I live on a street with a school. If I get home around school pick up time and my drive is blocked and I need to park further away from the house, it is hard with a toddler.

Do I leave him in the car, out of my view, whilst I bring in the shopping? Do I bring him in first, then leave him unsupervised in the house whilst I'm back and forth to the car?

Like you say, you know you don't own the space outside, but it's frustrating and inconvenient and I wouldn't do that to somebody else.

Orangerunner10 · 20/12/2020 22:36

I don’t understand surely there are spaces very close by you can use? We don’t have a drive, there is 1 space I would class directly outside my house but 4 or 5 others around it which are a few meters extra walk. Can’t you use one of them?

M4J4 · 20/12/2020 22:40

I can see why this is annoying OP, and if most people were honest they would admit they would be annoyed by it too.

Not much you can do about it but here’s hoping they shift it soon, and then I would move your car there.

LisaLee333 · 20/12/2020 23:33

Agree with @NameChange84 It's mumsnet parallel universe time. In real life, MOST people would get pissed off with a car parked right outside their house for 4 or 5 weeks, 24/7, when they don't know who it belongs to.

YANBU @Openalltheadvent but you won't get any support from here. Even though 90% of them would get irked by it if it happened to them!

Unfortunately, if it's taxed, and not parked on a junction, a bend, or on the footpath, there is little you can do. No harm in reporting it to 101 though. As a pp said, it could be stolen!

YANBU to be irked by it though. I would be, as would most other people. Wink

Original poster
Openalltheadvent · 20/12/2020 23:40

@Orangerunner10 my neighbours are parked in those spaces...outside their houses. Incidentally, my neighbour across the road puts plant pots outside hers to mark her place (VU)

Thank you for the last few nice comments! I agree most people would be annoyed deep down.
@TokenGinger this is exactly it!

OP posts:
NotPrude · 20/12/2020 23:41

@LisaLee333 But not in a terraced house.

If it was a semi, or a detached, then it makes more sense. But in a terraced road, you will always have someone else’s car parked in front of your house. It’s the nature of the road.

Original poster
Openalltheadvent · 20/12/2020 23:43

Also @QueenPaws you have the patience of a saint. 2 bloody years?! Halo

OP posts:
LisaLee333 · 20/12/2020 23:46

@NotPrude YES in a terraced house/road of terraced houses.

The point I am making is that the vast majority of people would be pissed off at the SAME CAR being stuck outside their house 24/7 for 4 or 5 weeks, when they don't know who it belongs to! Anyone who says they wouldn't care is lying.

NotPrude · 20/12/2020 23:53

@LisaLee333 It’s happened to me. Same car parked for weeks. Right outside my house.

Didn’t even question it or get annoyed. Am I lying?

It felt like a bonus whenever I got to park outside my house or near it. Because it’s part and parcel of living in a terraced road.

Original poster
Openalltheadvent · 20/12/2020 23:55

@NotPrude not our road! Everyone generally parks outside their own house

OP posts: