Fuck it. Let’s have a ‘Shit Secret Santa’ thread.

[Retiremental]

Mine hit a new low spot this year with Bayliss and fucking Harding

Someone in my team got nipple tassels she took it well but it was obvious she wasn't best pleased.

Quite a few years ago, I worked in an open plan office and we all opened our gifts in front of each other. My female colleague got a heart shaped pubic hair shaper 😳😳😳

@teachmehow14

I hate secret Santa! A couple of years ago I received some unicorn poo ‘slime’ from a colleague at work. I couldn’t believe it, I had to nod and smile when I opened it but I was sort of offended (turns out it was from a much older colleague who thought it was a good idea as I have nieces )

I really do wonder what goes through people's minds ...

At my old workplace I worked in an office of 6 women, we did secret Santa up to £10 each and all dropped plenty of hints about what we liked.

I was given to an older lady who hated me. She gave me the free makeup bag you got from Avon, it was hideous and flowery and all the free products had already been taken out. I knew this as I had already seen the catalogue for that month 😂

A bottle of red wine. So impersonal and a lazy gift. I’m known for being dog crazy so even a dog coaster or mug would have been a really easy gift but at least shows they put some effort in rather than grabbed something from their wine rack.

@NoGoodPunsLeft

Someone in my team got nipple tassels she took it well but it was obvious she wasn't best pleased.

Now wondering if @CounsellorTroi is my colleague

Two years in a row I got given a $10 Starbucks card. I am the only person in the office (worked there 8 years) that doesn’t drink coffee.

My female manager once bought me a lacy thong and a pin the cucumber on the male game 🤨

I once bought a gift for the only male in the team I was new to. I bought him a USB mug warmer & cup. Lovely gifts, if you drink warm drinks, unlike him 🙆‍♀️

We don’t bother with SS, we have a fuddle instead, only costs about £3 and everyone’s happy

@nobabiesyet

I would have been gutted too to get a charity goat.
I remember one year when I was I was a kid my aunt gave us similar and I was so disappointed.

This was mine. I’m 61 😂

One year I was the "crap gift giver" , but it wasn't my fault. All I was told was it was Secret Santa, no more than £10. Again it was random pull out of the bag job, so didn't need to buy for anyone specific. I bought a really nice set of Cath Kidston hand creams, very pretty and always useful.

Unknown to me, they had made it "food and drink only" as one person was fed up with getting candles every year..... but nobody bothered to tell me. So while everyone around the table, myself included, got something to eat or drink, one poor person pulled out a box of handcreams. I never admitted it was me, but in my defence, somebody really should have told me the rules!

This was mine last year 😂

@SandwhichGenerationGal

This was mine. I’m 61 😂

You may be 61 but you look proper down with the kids there!

Thank god for this thread so I can get this off my chest! I am fuming! £10 spend and I got an obviously home made “desk tidy”. Folded pieces of paper sewn together to store shit in, when we have an entirely paper free office. Anything that needs a note to explain what is is should not be given! Only thing as bad which someone else got was a set of cleaning materials (flash, jif etc) but at least they were useful! I wanted to snatch my gift back and storm out.

I'm usually pretty lucky. Worst one I ever got was drawer liners. Worst one I heard of was a Whoopi cushion, same person gave both of these.

Oh no, now I'm going to have to unwrap the Harding and Bayliss gift I bought and take it back for a refund. Thank God I found out in time it was a sh*t present. What was I thinking!

I once got a very pass ag gift of an Idiot’s Guide to (my job) from a woman who didn’t get my job... whole office was pretty shocked, it was so obviously her and she made herself look bitter & twisted. I laughed my head off and said “oh that’ll be useful!” She was a nasty piece of work.

[quote LyndaSnellsSniff]@GlummyMcGlummerson

I think I love Chris.[/quote]
Me too!

Not this year as I now don’t participate in Secret Santa, but this finished me off - a 12x4 inch (approx) Live, Laugh, Love wall hanging sign. 🤪 Foxtrot Oscar!

Gangsta Gran 😂

You reminded me of what we did too a co worker, he was male and always telling us what he wanted for SS.
He got a mug and was fuming, he was known for bad cheap gifts, and he had said he was getting our boss a cheap purse and putting a penny in it .
Our boss was a real laugh she drew £100 in two £50's out of the bank, and palmed them into the purse.
Someone shouted has it got any cash in and she opened it and pull out the notes, we watched as his mouth dropped and she then said let's go to the pub, drinks are on who ever was so generous.
All we could hear was him muttering about not checking the purse and that should have been his money.

Remembered another one

A group of ladies I got quite friendly with over 3 years online, we were all part of a group for parents with ill/disabled children.
One year, one of them suggested a £10 secret Santa. We could buy anything and put a note in.
All addresses given to one lady. 14 of us took part.
I got a postal box, jazzed it up and put in some really nice things for the lady I got and her 2 small children. Spent the full £10 and really enjoyed doing it.
One by one everyone showing what they got and saying thank you. Except me.
I never got sent a damn thing. I was so disappointed and felt like the person just didn't want to know. Obviously the lady who organised knew who it was (not the lady I got) buy wouldn't tell me.
The group suggested whoever it was should be quietly chucked from the group as it was so lazy and rude. Lady who organised said no as then we would all know.
So I left instead. I genuinely believe the woman organising was responsible. She was so off with everyone for being cross that someone let the side down, making excuses that perhaps they hadn't known what to get.
I still speak to two of the group though.

First year in new job posting... 5 euro spend, random tombola style gift distribution. I got a box cutter and a tape measure
Laughed it off, but it's probably my only gift this (shitty) year, so it kind of stung...

One year I got an (inflated!) inflatable male
Doll with an Ant Middleton face mask on it (my celeb crush!) and a hand made story book about my imaginary meeting with said celeb crush! Strange but absolutely hilarious!