We aren’t doing Christmas Presents this year...

[DBML]

We always do Christmas presents...though personally I couldn’t care less whether we did them or not, but historically we always have.

Today, I get a group text message that MIL is not doing presents and then BIL adds that he isn’t either.

Now, it’s not a huge deal and I understand...but am I being unreasonable thinking that they could have mentioned this a little earlier?

I completed my shopping weeks ago...bought all their gifts and the children’s gifts, which granted could probably mostly go back, but they are all here, wrapped and ready to be delivered in gift bags, with selection boxes and bottles of wine as the normal extras.

AIBU for being ever so slightly pissed off?

I will be letting it go, I’m certainly not going to complain, but felt like I needed a little vent.

I can understand why you're pissed off, I would be too at this late stage. I would say fine and store their presents away until next year.

Just put the presents away for their birthdays instead.

Yeah it's fine to say no pressies but it's ridiculously late to announce it now. Very few people will have not done their Christmas shopping by now. Can you put the pressies to one side for birthdays?

YANBU. Telling someone you’re not doing presents on the 19th of December is absolutely ridiculous. It’s way too late.

You lot really are mean! Just give them their presents and tell them you got the memo too late.

Yes, that’s a very good idea. I will put them away for birthdays. It’s still a waste of the pretty bags and an awful lot of chocolate and wine I’m going to have to get through 😁

I’d be very tempted to say “wish you’d says earlier, I’ve bought presents for all of you, but I’ll store them away for next year I guess”

It lets them know how inconvenient they’re being and also that they shouldn’t expect to profit by it, in case this was deliberate cheeky fuckery to score presents for free.

@VinylDetective I would if it was my side of the family, but I’m not doing that for the in-laws 😉

Yanbu to be pissed off. They have left it a bit late to announce this.

Can you either return the presents for refund or hang on to them and regift to others throughout the year For birthdays, special occasions or next Christmas?

I agree they've left it too late. Are they usually scatty/inconsiderate? Good idea about putting them aside for another occasion.

What did you say in response?

It's rude because it's too late. It's also rude to just decide you're not doing presents our of the blue. Sounds like she's deciding for the family. It also sounds like she knew fine well you'd already have bought presents.

Sorry x posted

I would have to tell them I'd bought them but will be storing for birthdays just to see if they'd say they'd accept them! And that would be a whole new thread....

@Butchyrestingface

They can be scatty and inconsiderate, yes, so I suppose I shouldn’t really be that surprised.

I just sent the ‘thumbs up’ emoji to be honest, I didn’t want to complain, but could bring myself to write ‘no problem’ either...so compromised with an emoji.

This close to Christmas is just rude!
I agree out the presents away for birthdays x

I’d still give the presents to kids, but would make a point not giving to the adults given how late they’ve announced it.

Good response. I made the "no presents" suggestion back at the start of November. I know some people start shopping even earlier than that but I felt that was reasonable.

Your are not being unreasonable, informing someone that; 6 days before Christmas day is taking the piss.

Positive spin.

1. Future birthdays or even next Xmas are sorted.
2. Just in case it’s a ‘no gift ambush’ you’re safe. If they Rick up with things to show you up, you can whip your gifts out with a “ha haaaaaaa”!!!
3. Extra choc and wine for you for after Xmas is always a bonus.

We don't do presents, but I agree that it was too late. It might be that they want to continue with this, so give another time, or keep what you can because the school collections/raffles might start up again. If the chocolate isn't really wanted by you, put it in a foodbank collection.

*rock up
No clue who Rick is

Thedevilinablackdress

I’d have been both delighted and relieved to have had the message back at the start of November. I loathe present shopping, but still go to quite a lot of effort. It would have saved me a fair bit of time and money.

[quote DBML]@VinylDetective I would if it was my side of the family, but I’m not doing that for the in-laws 😉[/quote]
You’re not taking the long view. Giving them their presents when they have none for you will make them feel an inch tall. If you’re not keen on them it’s the passive aggressive gift that keeps on giving!

Good idea Ponoka7! I would feel better at least donating the selection boxes! A nice job for this afternoon.

@VinylDetective

Ahh! I get it!! 😂