What things do you find rude that others don’t seem to?

[TheRaccoon]

I’ll go first:

• People who season food before they’ve tried it
• People who take ages to text back (or don’t at all)
• People who are late for no reason

When people via email spell my (standard, normal) name wrong. It's there as part of the email address and it's especially rude when they're replying to an email I've just signed off and they STILL GET MY NAME WRONG!! Aaarrrghh!!

Also when people waltz into the office at 9am (9-5 desk job) and eat breakfast at their desk (cereal or toast). It's always been an annoyance of mine no matter where I've worked. If you want breakfast, eat before you go to work. You get a lunch break NOT a breakfast break. If you 'haven't got time' then get up earlier.

People who ring, leave a message and then keep ringing every 45 seconds.

If I haven't answered the phone, there is a reason - I'm driving or in the shower or making pastry and my hands are covered in gunk. Just go away and do something else, I'll call back when I'm not busy.

Social incompetence - For example, my DH saw my BIL whilst out and about, as DH went to walk past he said hello, BIL stared at him like a rabbit in the headlights, hot heeled and walked in the opposite direction leaving DH wondering what he'd done wrong and why BIL couldnt have just said hello.
I have seen this many times with people, they look right at you, they know you and do this instead of just saying hello. My Mum and Dad did it to one of my employees who had fixed both their cars for years, My brother did it a few times to my stepson at the gym until my step son just started ignoring him.
Its just so awkward and unnecessary especially if you actually know the person saying hello, have seen them and can't avoid them. Why would anyone do this? Saying hello back is all that is needed, no-one needs to become best mates.
(No history by the way, all completely unexplained, which is why I find it so puzzling and so rude)

@milssofadoesntreallyfit. Maybe they can't place them.

Lots of people are hopeless at faces when out of context. Like seeing your postman on a plane. It throws some people off their stride.

They see each other regularly and have known each other for 10yrs plus.

If I see a face I'm familiar with but can't place and they speak, I honestly can't say ive behaved like that, I'd feel crap if I did.

Ah, yes, agree with the “before my time” thing. It does qualify as kind of rude, because it’s a bit tinkly laugh I’m so young, me ! and it is certainly not endearing.

Ken Bruce on Popmaster gets cross about this. You can almost hear him seething.

Parents who visit your house with their toddler/pre schooler and let them run amok trashing everything, letting them use everything as a "toy" and not supervising them properly. It's your child, you monitor, Im not toddler proofing my house each time you visit!!

I’m sure we all have situations when we can’t place people - the postman on the plane is a good example.

BUT the polite thing to do is smile and say hello if someone greets you, even if you haven’t the foggiest who they are.

I remember some years ago I said hello to a woman in Waitrose that I had sat next to and chatted with at a toddler group for several weeks. She glared at me and said rather haughtily, “I don’t think I know you.” I slunk off highly embarrassed.

• other motorists who stop a line of traffic to let a pedestrian cross a road when there's no crossing. If everyone just drove and used crossings correctly, we'd all reach our destination quickly.

• when we could still go to the pub, people who would put Videos on their phones with the volume turned up to show their mates. Don't assume that the rest of the pub is interested.

• when you watch a performance and people can't be bothered to applaud at the end. It doesn't make you look cool, whatever you might think. It's rude.

• lateness

• people who apologise when a) there's nothing to apologise for, and b) they don't mean it. It cheapens the notion of an apology, is unnecessary and disingenuous. Like when I get a call from someone trying to sell me something and the first thing they say is, "sorry to disturb you, Mrs Alles . . ." Why are you sorry? You called me!

IrmaFayLear
Your right it is the polite thing to do, I do think there is a big difference between postman on a plane and a family member or someone you actively engaged with 9n a regular basis.
Brother even said he'd seen stepson at gym! Seemed to miss the but where he hadn't bother his arse to say hello back!! I was a bit gobsmacked!!!!

Not controversial but it's not

Me-chelle, its Mich- elle 😡

I remember seeing a couple I knew in a supermarket, I said hi and they pretended they hadn't heard and pretty much ran back the direction they'd come from. Kept running in to them in other aisles, and every time they'd rush off the other way.

(Back story: They were a couple of snobs, I lived in a council house and they'd been friendly originally until they realised I wasn't well off like them. I'd never been rude to them though, and there'd been no conflict, so no need for the reaction.)

MedusasBadHairDay
Exactly the kind of thing I mean, it's not being caught off guard, it's just really deliberate, rude and unnecessary. They actively try and avoid.

@Milssofadoesntreallyfit

MedusasBadHairDay Exactly the kind of thing I mean, it's not being caught off guard, it's just really deliberate, rude and unnecessary. They actively try and avoid.

Yep, it's not like I wanted to stop and chat to them either. Just say hi and keep going, no need for the rudeness.

When there is absolutely no acknowledgement if you let a car out from a junction etc or if you hold a door open from someone. I’m not expecting a thank you worthy of an Oscar speech, but a nod of the head/smile/raise of the hand is appreciated. Although if we’re being more flashy, I do quite like the quick double indicator/hazard light flash that lorry drivers give when you let them out on the motorway!

At the other end of the spectrum, I find that wombats might look cute, but can be quite rude!

“I’m regarded as being good value at events and one of the things I’ve noticed is that the people who sit there frozen, looking needy, in silence often can’t wait to draw me OUT of a lively group discussion at the table and IN to a 1-1 conversation, usually about themselves and their needs and insecurities. As if I were an accessory or a cover to help them feel less embarrassed”.

Is this person for real?!!

People who say perfectly innocuous food stinks, like an orange.

@Furries

When there is absolutely no acknowledgement if you let a car out from a junction etc or if you hold a door open from someone. I’m not expecting a thank you worthy of an Oscar speech, but a nod of the head/smile/raise of the hand is appreciated. Although if we’re being more flashy, I do quite like the quick double indicator/hazard light flash that lorry drivers give when you let them out on the motorway!

At the other end of the spectrum, I find that wombats might look cute, but can be quite rude!

I once held the door open at a cinema for people behind me, they started filing out and didn’t take over the door holding, as you do, and no one said thank you. After 3-4 ppl walked out, I let go of the door, only for the two people it closed on to give me dirty looks. They really thought I should stand there just holding the door open! We were clearly cinema goers like them.

When you've finished paying for your shopping, can see a queue behind you, but stand there chatting away to the shops assistant because you know them. And keep talking. And keep talking some more until the next in line (me) tells you to shift it.

This happened to me today, twice. Once in Tesco and once in the garden centre. Apparently its totally fine to hold everyone up whilst you carry on chatting.

I am the only person I know who finds this rude but people leaving whatsap groups with no explanation or goodbye.
‘X has left the group’ always feels really rude to me!

People who talk loudly so they can be heard by others not in their company
People who don't have their payment card ready at the checkout - then start grovelling around in their bag to look for it - seriously, don't you know you have to pay?
Nosy people

"Shop assistants who, when giving you change, put the note in your hand first and the balance the coins on top."

How would you like them to give you your change Hesma, I am genuinely confused

@LimitIsUp

"Shop assistants who, when giving you change, put the note in your hand first and the balance the coins on top."

How would you like them to give you your change Hesma, I am genuinely confused

I remember a very angry AIBU thread years ago where some people were outraged by change being placed on top of notes, and some were outraged by being handed change first. And neither side could work out why retail staff didn't have a standard way of handling it.

I missed that one - sounds like a gem