To be angry my family just don't seem to care about mixing?

[hellymissy]

Turns out my 60 year old mom has been collecting my nephews aged 6 and 13 from school most days - both of which obviously are mixing With lots of kids.

Whilst she isn't in the worst health she has a mild underlying condition.

I told my brother my mom should be doing this and he seemed to get angry at me mentioning and said as mom isn't objecting he doesn't see what the issue is.

I've approached this with my mom and she said it's fine.

Do I just leave them to it? I don't want my mom contracting corona and feel she's getting pressured into it?

AIBU and should I just keep my mouth shut?

@Lou98

Your mum is an adult, nothing to do with you.

Yet another thread of people trying to 'parent' their parents 🙄

Yep.

Be interesting to see what happens to all these bossy DC when they're my age.

My kids have raised concerns and then left it to us to decide. That's as it should be.

She is younger than my DH, and we have a secondary age child who admittedly isn't actually in school right now, but she will be as soon as she can cope again . It's her decision.

It is my business when my mom dies and I'm left without a mother though.

I feel it's very selfish to lean on parents who are 60 (when there are other alternatives, which for my brother there are) In a pandemic for childcare.

Extremely selfish. Perhaps I touched a few raw nerves here but it's not fair. At all, no way would I be asking my mom to babysit my kids when she's at risk of dying from it. Utterly selfish.

My nephew is at school with 1000 plus pupils every day.

Leave them to it, don't have a go at your brother about it as it's not your place nor his place. It's up to your mother.

they're not doing anything wrong and its really nothing to do with you. Get a grip!

@hellymissy

It is my business when my mom dies and I'm left without a mother though.

I feel it's very selfish to lean on parents who are 60 (when there are other alternatives, which for my brother there are) In a pandemic for childcare.

Extremely selfish. Perhaps I touched a few raw nerves here but it's not fair. At all, no way would I be asking my mom to babysit my kids when she's at risk of dying from it. Utterly selfish.

My nephew is at school with 1000 plus pupils every day.

That’s really mad. It’s up to your mum.

If she wants to take up smoking, that’s up to her too.

She is a free person, as well as being your mum.

She could be working with covid patients now. My father is dead but he’d have been the first retiree to volunteer at the front line.

You don’t get to control other people’s behaviour unless you have young D.C.

Also, if you are in the UK, did you make your mum do as you said during the flu deaths of 2017-18? No? Why not?

To posters saying it's nothing to do with me how is not - she's my mother?

I find it odd that people don't attempt to help their family when they're making bad decisions that are life or death?

Most people seem to not give or shit or maybe because it's not your parents were talking about so it doesn't matter?

@AcornAutumn because she didn't have a 15% risk of dying. The flu is not the same as Covid. Particularly if you have underlying health, 60 and bame all of which mine is

I'm annoyed because my brother always uses my mom doesn't respect her and only cares about himself. He's not even thought about asking or discussing the risks with her

You’re talking as if 60 is elderly! It isn’t, and your mother is perfectly capable of making choices for herself. It’s competitive normal for children to be being looked after by grandparents again now, everyone I know is doing it.

@hellymissy

My parents are doing the same for one of my
Siblings and I’ve also raised my concerns.
So now they wear a mask in the car and open all the windows.

I agree with what you are saying; and don’t think it’s worth the risk.

She doesn’t have a 15% chance of dying op - where did you get that from?!

To posters saying .69 isn't old I agree it isn't but you are in denial. Over 50 risk increase significantly particularly if bame and underlying health. My mom has all factors so it should be taken seriously

@OverTheRainbow88 thank you I'm really shocked and surprised more people don't seem to care.

@hellymissy

I agree, maybe it’s because lots of people are doing the same as don’t have another choice so feel a bit guilty about it.

The only aspect that would concern me is you genuinely feel she'd rather not and is being pressured into it. Otherwise, respect your mother's autonomy.

The extent of how scared my mom is of this disease she refuses to go to work, or eat out anywhere in case the cooks have corona!!!? Which is ridiculous but then she's ok with picking him up in a car when theyve been mixing with hundreds.

If she gets it and anything happens to her I'll be very very angry

[quote hellymissy]@AcornAutumn because she didn't have a 15% risk of dying. The flu is not the same as Covid. Particularly if you have underlying health, 60 and bame all of which mine is [/quote]
Where did you get that figure from?

[quote hellymissy]@AcornAutumn because she didn't have a 15% risk of dying. The flu is not the same as Covid. Particularly if you have underlying health, 60 and bame all of which mine is [/quote]
She doesn’t have that now

Where on earth did you find a figure like that?!

How can she “refuse” to go to work btw?

@hellymissy I'll be soo angry though if something happens to her

its her choice. she knows the risk. I have the exact same situation and my (high risk) DM has been staying with a sibling on and off and minding their kids and going around as usual. I was angry at first but she explained to me that she would rather take the risk than waste her life sitting in her house. I personally disagree with her choice but its her choice. (also think sibling is a selfish dick but thats not a shock)

I'm 51 and more at risk working in a care home.

Going against the grain, but I'm going to say YANBU - similar frustrations with my own family. Christmas plan is to mix 3 households, including an 81 year old and someone who is highly exposed. But it's fine, because they'll be sitting at opposite ends of the table...

@vodkaredbullgirl I understand some have to take risks. My job involves risk too - however when there IS an option to not be at risk then it's not quite the same thing.

My mom doesn't have to pick them up, so why choose the extra risk? It doesn't make sense.
thing.

Do you have children op ?