To ask about your worst CF MIL stories?

[MessyMummy15]

I'm actually very lucky to have a lovely mother in law now but my ex's mum was something else!

Once when I had to move in with her temporarily for a couple of week. I had taken my first shower in the house. Afterwards she came to find me and frogmarched me to the bathroom telling me that she doesn't like the shower curtain getting wet and to fold it back when I'm showering which is already 🤔
The next time I had a shower I did as she asked and then asked her where I could find a mop / towel to clean the water on the floor (since you know... there's no shower curtain) she had the biggest flip out when she discovered there was a smal puddle on the floor and the bathroom mat was a bit wet.
She also told me that I wasn't allowed to use the towels as they was for display? (Wasn't going to they was about a million years old)
She proceeded to tell my ex that I was trying to destroy the house. Baffles me to this day how she washed??

That woman has made me sooo thankful for the MIL I have now!

What's your CF MIL stories? The crazier the better!!

Blimey, my resentment at being asked to drive my ex-MIL to Mass every Sunday when she stayed for weekends and then go and pick her up an hour later pales into insignificance compared to some of these vile harridans.

She also objected to me doing my ironing on a Sunday morning when she was here because it was "rude", apparently. ExH was already up and about to entertain her, but I noted that he wasn't expected to drive her to mass.

When we divorced, one of the things that he cited as unreasonable behaviour was the fact that I didn't like his mother. Part of me was tempted to fight the divorce, just for the pleasure of saying that, while it was true that I didn't like her, it wasn't unreasonable because she was a racist, sexist manipulative old bat.

Mine is generally pleasant but she doesn’t like that me and my children are put first in my husbands life now. She’ll deny it but she’s very manipulative and he always feels bad and guilty for saying no to her about anything.
There have been many things over the years that have caused issues between me and my husband (related to mil) but the absolute last one was when she invited him on holiday without us, because there wasn’t room. That ended in a bit of ultimatum from me. I mean, who does that???

My DH's parents are both dead now but neither of them were great parents.

His mum never liked me but I don't think she would have liked any woman he married. She told me it was not normal that I was older than DH (all of 3 years!). She also said I must have been grateful that DH wanted to marry me as I was on the shelf! I was 25.

On our wedding day as we walked into the Register Office she turned to me and said "I'll give it a year if you're lucky"! How lovely.

She was always trying to make trouble between me and DH, always criticising anything I did. If I had my hair cut or she knew I had bought something she would always say "Oh spending DH's money again" even though I worked full time and, in fact, earned more than him at the time.

We fell out with her many times over the years and eventually stopped all contact

My first Exmil was a pain but meant well and I loved her. When I spilt from her son she still stayed in contact and saw the grandkids for a good few years too till I moved away but she sent cards and wee token gifts for the kids. She went NC with her own son because of his behaviour. Yup towards me and the kids

My husbands mother was a manipulative, gaslighting cow. Whispering poison into the kids ears his and mine and then denied it ever happened. We had to go NC as it was affecting our relationship with each other and the kids for a good few years and don’t get me started on my FIL. Sexist, racist etc.

My own mother was a bloody nightmare to my husband as she was jealous he’d taken me away from her. What that meant was we moved for our jobs and stability. She got told off for that one and I got all you think of is money. It’s one of the reason I went low contact.

My ex mil is a nice lady but very very miserly . She's rich as midas which is why I am baffled at her behaviour. Once she cooked us a nice Sunday dinner and, as you do , I complimented her on the beef . She said, glad you liked it, it's been in the freezer for 4 years, I didnt want to bin it so I cooked it today!
Another time , my ds said Grandma had no food so they had a tin of frankfurters and a slice of bread for tea . I did have to ask her about it as DS is not always reliable. Turns out ex DP was the CF in this situation, turning up unannounced expecting ds to be fed , she said she wasnt expecting them ap had nothing in... she has a large chest freezer in the garage and I found it hard to believe she didnt have a few fish fingers and oven chips to heat up in an emergency

I always wonder about these MIL stories because I love my MIL but one of the DIL's has had a very difficult past with her. I always wonder what the other side of the story is. Some have got to be straight up crazy but I think sometimes it's women not getting along

@johnstownflood

I'm guessing you're not a MIL yourself yet OP ? I'm not either and I think I'm a pretty nice person but there is so much vitriol on MN against MILs that I'm feeling quite nervous at the prospect.

Surely there must be some DILs that actually like their MIL ?

I've got a boy and I always think the same. I love my MIL btw

@Barmyfarmy

Step-Mother In law stayed a few times with FIL to look after children when DH and I had to travel. She rifled through our bedroom, through every drawer and cupboard and found my lingerie and some objects in a box under our bed and left us a note saying 'sex is for reproduction only', ordered me to get rid of my 'slutty' lingerie and The Box and moved my things into a spare room saying we needed to sleep alone so DH wouldn't get 'sexual urges'. A certain item was missing from The Box though so perhaps she wasn't as sin-free as she liked to think... She also left a bible on the side for us and invited us to speak to her vicar to get help.

SMIL also disapproved of DH (her step-son) because he has tattoos and a beard which she called 'unprofessional'. He's retired and runs our working farm so it's hardly an issue to his career! She even bought him a shaver and sent him youtube videos of people shaving off their beard so he'd know how to do it. She also offered to pay for laser removal of his tattoos (former tattoo artist so he's covered head to toe and would likely come out looking slightly mangled if he had that much laser removal!).

We have 4 children who she asked if we regretted having. She also criticised me for having a child so young with an older man (her SS, my DH) as I'd thrown my life away. She also pulled my top up once to see how my stomach was 3 weeks post partum from baby no.4.

She also once phoned the police saying she witnessed my DH abusing me and threatening to kill me when all she'd seen was him smacking my arse lightly as he passed me in the kitchen. She hid in the garden when the police arrived and we had no idea what was happening. She later explained that she was uncomfortable with how DH being older than me meant he had more power over me and I was clearly being abused as he was able to hit me and I couldn't do anything as I was scared he'd lash out at me.

She got back in contact a few months ago as she'd heard I had an inheritance and said she hadn't received her share of it yet. The inheritance was a doll's house from my great aunt and the grand sum of £100. I sent her £2.50 for a giggle

Sorry for the long post but jeepers that felt good to get off my chest!

She sounds bloody nuts!

My MIL is lovely, we don't always see eye to eye and have very different personalities but she is a lovely woman. My FIL on the other hand, is a racist, misogynistic, alcoholic who wasn't even there for the majority of my partners childhood (my partber actually had to introduce himself to the man when he was a teenager) who thinks it is acceptable to tell us how to raise our children. There are so many cruel, nasty comments he has made to me and funnily enough they are never in earshot of my partner

My mother in law now is the most amazing lady I’ve ever met
I’d take a bullet for both her and my fil
My partner will never get to meet his in laws-I’ve made sure of it

The only time she’s ever upset me is when we where watching tv and my fil commented that he ‘doesn’t trust skinny women’

Quick as a flash she turned to me,smiled, and said
‘Well,we’ll be ok then,won’t we rainbow?’!

I know she didn’t mean it-and she’s firmly forgiven

I’m sure she thinks I’m a bit mental myself lol

She is who I want to be when I’m a mil and granny myself

@Barmyfarmy

Step-Mother In law stayed a few times with FIL to look after children when DH and I had to travel. She rifled through our bedroom, through every drawer and cupboard and found my lingerie and some objects in a box under our bed and left us a note saying 'sex is for reproduction only', ordered me to get rid of my 'slutty' lingerie and The Box and moved my things into a spare room saying we needed to sleep alone so DH wouldn't get 'sexual urges'. A certain item was missing from The Box though so perhaps she wasn't as sin-free as she liked to think... She also left a bible on the side for us and invited us to speak to her vicar to get help.

SMIL also disapproved of DH (her step-son) because he has tattoos and a beard which she called 'unprofessional'. He's retired and runs our working farm so it's hardly an issue to his career! She even bought him a shaver and sent him youtube videos of people shaving off their beard so he'd know how to do it. She also offered to pay for laser removal of his tattoos (former tattoo artist so he's covered head to toe and would likely come out looking slightly mangled if he had that much laser removal!).

We have 4 children who she asked if we regretted having. She also criticised me for having a child so young with an older man (her SS, my DH) as I'd thrown my life away. She also pulled my top up once to see how my stomach was 3 weeks post partum from baby no.4.

She also once phoned the police saying she witnessed my DH abusing me and threatening to kill me when all she'd seen was him smacking my arse lightly as he passed me in the kitchen. She hid in the garden when the police arrived and we had no idea what was happening. She later explained that she was uncomfortable with how DH being older than me meant he had more power over me and I was clearly being abused as he was able to hit me and I couldn't do anything as I was scared he'd lash out at me.

She got back in contact a few months ago as she'd heard I had an inheritance and said she hadn't received her share of it yet. The inheritance was a doll's house from my great aunt and the grand sum of £100. I sent her £2.50 for a giggle

Sorry for the long post but jeepers that felt good to get off my chest!

Excellent sending the money.

Dhs half sister is money oriented. She knew about an inheritance I had a while back and suddenly wanted to be my best friend.

My mil is a lovely lady as with everyone else in the world she has a few quirks.
But until my Sil died she always thinks I'm a child. The day after she told me that I
would have to be a grown up now. I'm 60.

Has anyone's MIL been so focused on money all the time?

I like MIL in general. She's not a nasty person like I have read in this thread.
But she always talks about money. She's so nosy. She asks how much we spent for eat out, how much we paid for holiday, DD's toy, clothes etc. I have started lying because of all questions I get. If I'm telling the truth, she thinks it's "posh".
My DH and I are just normal couple who like eat out and travel. MIL, who has got more money than us, no mortgage seems to be so stingy.

She checked how much I spent on Christmas gift for her one year...
She told us to come for wedding anniversary dinner which will be paid by them. We went to normal pub, she checked all menu and talked about price straight away. It was so hard to order something "inexpensive". It is normal local pub that average meal cost around £7. She said dessert are ridiculously expensive, then told me " You don't want dessert, do you. We have a cake from Tesco at home"

Very thankful that they offered to pay, but rather I wanted to order something I like and pay by myself.

I'm just tired of money topic all the time!

Mine forgot the gender of her own grandchild.
She cried when we got engaged (which is normal) but then told me she 'hated' me because I was 'taking her baby boy away' ..... we lived 20 mins away and saw her every week. I moved country and left my family behind so DH didnt have to move.
She cried the whole way through her reading at our wedding and said it was 'her moment'.
When my baby was 2 weeks old she was holding her, and then refused to give her back, and kept saying 'no. She is my baby!'. My FIL had to firmly tell her to 'give the baby back'. He could see I was about to explode with rage.
She disappeared in a shopping centre with my baby in a buggy when I turned my back once. I couldnt find her. found her showing her off to the cashiers saying how gorgeous 'her baby' was.
Both her and FIL tried to legally block DH from getting inheritance his aunt left him unless I signed a prenup because I was 'poor' and 'could be a gold digger ' and they have to 'protect' DH from me (which they said to my face). I had been around 3 years by that point, had a masters and my own career, and had just funded DH through a career change.

Surely there must be some DILs that actually like their MIL ?

Me! She's more supportive than my own parents are.
The ILs aren't perfect, Fil definitely has some boundary issues but they're better than my cold and disinterested parents.

@Anpanmum

Has anyone's MIL been so focused on money all the time?

I like MIL in general. She's not a nasty person like I have read in this thread.
But she always talks about money. She's so nosy. She asks how much we spent for eat out, how much we paid for holiday, DD's toy, clothes etc. I have started lying because of all questions I get. If I'm telling the truth, she thinks it's "posh".
My DH and I are just normal couple who like eat out and travel. MIL, who has got more money than us, no mortgage seems to be so stingy.

She checked how much I spent on Christmas gift for her one year...
She told us to come for wedding anniversary dinner which will be paid by them. We went to normal pub, she checked all menu and talked about price straight away. It was so hard to order something "inexpensive". It is normal local pub that average meal cost around £7. She said dessert are ridiculously expensive, then told me " You don't want dessert, do you. We have a cake from Tesco at home"

Very thankful that they offered to pay, but rather I wanted to order something I like and pay by myself.

I'm just tired of money topic all the time!

Yes! FIL and Ex S-MIL were much wealthier than DH and I, and we live very comfortably. When we went out for any birthdays or celebrations she'd expect us to pay to prove we weren't as financially strained as she insisted we were. Once she'd gone out with a large group of friends before a get together at her and FIL's home and we agreed to give her a lift home as we were going past anyway. She texted me asking me to meet her at the table and when I arrived she and her friends walked out and left me with the bill. FIL thankfully paid me back as it was over £2000 and we'd just bought our house so money was tight.

We always joked that if we split up my dm would want to know what I had done to cause, while my mil would have wantec to know what dh had done, she warned ne when I married him that he was a great I'm gunna(as in I'm going to do that) that his df and she wasn't wrong. She died about 6 yrs ago and I still miss her, she wasn't afraid of putting dh right if she felt he was in the wrong.

One of the first things she said to me was that she had had a nightmare mil(some of her tales!!) and to let her know if she started to make a nuisance of herself, I never had to unlike my dm

Surely there must be some DILs that actually like their MIL ?

Loads of us (I love mine very much), but we don't have stories for this sort of thread (thankfully, you poor buggers!)

Just to clarify! I actually love my current mother in law! I actually call her my second mum.
She has 10 grandchildren including my two and is always fair and kind to all of them and never overbearing. We see her every week at least once.
She is deffo what I aspire to be as a mother in law! (I have two boys)

Didn't mean to start a bashing post just wondered if anyone had similar stories about EXMIL.

Also... wasn't married to ex. (Thank god) We was teenagers, it was just a horrendous introduction to "in laws" lol

I can’t stand mil or fil but it’s mostly little things. Like introducing my husband and our baby to someone they knew and leaving me standing there like a lemon. Or taking “Family” photos with my baby and taking one “with everyone else” in a minute. Thanking just dh for gifts that I had actually brought them. Undermining me with my parenting. Never thanking me when I cooked for them. Knowing I was cooking, so eating elsewhere and then being too full to eat.
Trying to convince my dh not to go through with the wedding. Refusing to put any photos up that we gave them of us as a family or us on our wedding day. Not speaking to us for months because I got sick and so we couldn’t visit one time. The best one was putting up photos of dh ex and their wedding in the bedroom we were staying in at their house! I could write a book. However I literally do not give a monkeys about them anymore because they hurt me so often. They now try to be nice but I don’t feel anything for them and protect my own feelings that way. They lost out not me.

@formerbabe

I mean you could have just said no sorry we can't give you a lift?

Oh I'd have happily said that...unfortunately dh organised it and won't hear a,negative word said about her

Ahhh one of those eh? 🤦🏻‍♀️ He'd have gone alone in my house then

I can see why he's an ex!!

@SirGawain

Also when we lived with her, she insisted she take care of the money we were saving for or own place. And you gave it to her!!!!!

Yes I did. Because saying she would keep it safe, and being 19 at the time I didn't see any reason not to trust her, or think she'd give it away.

Mine demanded a DNA test when we told her we were having our first baby, then cried and said we had ruined her life as she didn't want to become a grandma until she was 65.

My DH works away a lot for his job, and had to work abroad over Christmas just after DD was born. Knowing that MIL would be alone on Christmas day, I arranged to take DD round to see her on Christmas morning to open gifts, we had some breakfast together and had a lovely morning. DH rang me on boxing day to tell me how upset his mum was that she didn't get to see her first grand child on her first Christmas Day, she lied to him saying I hadn't been over. He went NC with her after that for years, and they only started talking again when she contacted him to tell her she had a terminal illness. She didn't.

[quote Strangedayindeed]@innercitysumo you gave her your money? Why??[/quote]
Because she said it was better her keep it safe as we would waste it! Seemed
A good idea. I was 19 at the time, didn't know she would give it away 🙄 no reason not to trust her at that point. True colours came later.