Is this a shit present?

[HiyaMeAgain]

I am struggling what to get my DM for Christmas. So far she has some perfume and a box of sweets from the grand kids. I was thinking a nice cashmere scarf and gloves? Is it a bit shit? Shes 65(ish [hmmm] ) if that makes a difference?

If I still had my mum I would probably get her a cashmere cardigan, Fenjal bath creme, sheepskin slippers, a notebook and some good quality chocolates.

Clicked too soon.
I think a scarf is a good present. Cashmere, lovely! Just bought scarf and gloves for an aunt.

My mother in law has no hobbies, never leaves the house etc. So I’ve made her a ‘comfort’ basket. Nice basket from Oxfam, wool knee blanket, book, ringtons tea bags and shortbread, mug, fluffy socks , foot cream and hand cream. May add small bottle of baileys!

@BarbaraofSeville get a grip
@clpsmum, Barbara has a point. There are only so many scarves and gloves you need.

@MikeUniformMike I was more talking about her comment about taking away her mums ability to wear something of her own choosing!

Cashmere - shit??

She'll love it. You know she will. Bit of a humble brag lol

How was I meant to know that from your pp?

A scarf is the sort of present you get at least one of most Christmases. You only need one at a time. It is just clutter, and if you operate a one in one out policy, you'll be donating a scarf to charity shop, who struggle to sell them.

I love scarves. I’ve had about twenty scarves, probably more, at once, although I have cut down a bit. I would happily buy or receive a new scarf every year as long as it matched my style and was good quality. A cashmere scarf (or any lovely scarf) would always be welcome. Of course that’s just me and many people wouldn’t feel that way. I love handbags too while some people would rather have a bag for life &/or a bench.

But if OP thinks her mum would like it, and if she knows anything at all about her, it’s really not a shit gift at all.

Anyway I think OP has found some other good options by now...

Im 47 and have grown up kids.

I remember years ago when my mam was still alive,she used to tell me not to bother with a Christmas gift she had everything.And funny enough i feel the same way now.

Now my sons are giving me money [they insisted] but if they did want to get me something i would rather a tattoo voucher or Madonna stuff [i love her].

I would probably buy her either a dressing gown [a nice warm one]
or an Alexa.

I'm 65+ and would always prefer to be asked rather than given something I don't want. Personally I'm very happy with the right cookery book or the bath oil I always use. As an old fart I'm happy to give bossy instructions about exactly what I want.

Rather than the "comfort basket" that @Beerwife suggests, you could give a hamper of luxury foods that you know she likes, as my DIL sometimes does for me? You must have a pretty good idea what these are? Perhaps smoked salmon, cherries in Kirsch, chocolate, glace fruits, honey, homemade cake - ideally not all things that need to be eaten or drunk immediately.

If she is a cook you could giver her unusual jars of spice paste, good oils, interesting nuts and fruits. My MIL loved shortbread and really nice biscuits, but was particularly pleased with a lovely fruitcake in a tin. And nothing wrong with the Baileys, unless you think she might go for something more unusual. Champagne never fails....

I'm in my sixties, and would be really happy with a cashmere pashmina. As big as possible. And in one of my favourite colours.

I’m not sure if it helps or not but we bought my MIL gloves and scarf and she loved them....but she was a little odd

(thinks of dropping heavy hints about cashmere scarf & gloves )
op I think your idea is fine
I don't know about anybody else but I am always loosing gloves or they are in the wrong coat -

Ask her what she'd like?? I'm glad my daughter does that! And yes, even expensive scarves or gloves are crap presents, I'd agree.

It goes to show just how much people have. People are obsessed with buying too much for no purpose. Give to charity instead and tell them that they have bought a meal for a homeless person, sponsored a guide dog etc

I got my DM leather gloves for Christmas once. She absolutely loved them & said they protected her hands from the sun when she drove.

Your idea sounds lovely, @HiyaMeAgain but if your mum is so picky about everything, I’m not quite sure what would make her happy.
Fancy chocolates, perhaps?

I've bought mine a recycled cashmere wrap thing from Turtle Doves, plus a book and a crossword book. Not very exciting but at 85, its tricky. She doesnt want more "stuff". DS is getting her some spiced rum, as she loves a wee drop of rum, and Dd a voucher to take her out for afternoon tea next year sometime.

I've decided against a scarf and gloves. She does wear them, especially when it's cold as she walks to work a bit, but she doesn't need new ones I suppose.

I'm going with a gardening hamper and a magazine subscription,

Everybody does present giving differently, doesn't mean one way or another is wrong, if you want to ask what exactly they want, that's fine, if you would rather donate to charity, that's fine too, I would rather surprise the people I'm buying for (unless they ask specifically for something) I like to be surprised too, most people are grateful for what they get and seem happy with it too, those who are not are more than welcome to exchange for something else.

Thanks everyone and Merry Christmas 🎄

A silk pillow case then she won’t need all the lotions and potions

@MarchionessofActon oh come on it was hardly a boast of any kind. Such a miserable and judgmental response- why!? 🤷‍♀️🤦‍♀️

I'm 63 and my friend has just bought me an Air Fryer, its fantastic!

A grey cashmere scarf is a fab present. I’d be happy with one.

My mum is so hard to buy for but this year I decided to not even ask her for any ideas and went ahead and bought her a really nice knitted gilet. I actually think she's going to love it. She's always complaining that she's cold but then gets too hot in jumpers 🙄

Also Freddie's Flowers is who I use for flower subscriptions