Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To turn down a 3x salary job?

409 replies

Fressia123 · 03/12/2020 11:33

I'm really really torn. Earlier in the year I got offered a job that pays £60k. I couldn't take it as it required relocation. They just got back to me to say they're happy to offer same role, different location but within commuting distance (1 hour drive). My current job pays £21k. I love what I'm building with it but I seriously doubt it will ever get beyond £30k. So it's between loving my company/job and the £££s. I'm absolutely torn.

OP posts:
Nothing7 · 05/12/2020 10:23

Happiness at work is so important and to be in an organisation you feel valued and respected and vice versa

Wishihadanalgorithm · 05/12/2020 10:24

What have you got to lose by taking the promotion? It is HUGE! I can imagine it feels really daunting and the idea of the commute might put you off but it’s all worth a go.

When I had a long commute I used it as my time to prep for work and come down from it so it didn’t overspill too much into my ordinary life.

Fressia123 · 05/12/2020 10:35

Well I know how much my peers make, they've been longer so got a couple ££ on top. Someone who started at the same time as me became a TL and now I make more than him.

OP posts:
Fressia123 · 05/12/2020 10:38

And recruiters are very persuasive!

OP posts:
TatianaBis · 05/12/2020 10:55

If you’re going to turn it down anyway, you have nothing to lose by saying you can’t work nights due to family but you’d like to work for them, can they offer you a comparable daytime role?

Fressia123 · 05/12/2020 11:01

I actually thought about a daytime shift which would be 8-7. Not terrible but with a 60min (sometimes longer commute) I wouldn't see my toddler at all for 4 days of the week. Doesn't seem worth it. I'd also lose the night shift bonus which is considerable.

OP posts:
TatianaBis · 05/12/2020 11:24

Yeah I thought you’d get paid more for overnights. I can see that doesn’t work.

Nothing7 · 05/12/2020 12:28

The fact you’re not gonna to see your toddler seems like a big sacrifice. You’ve plenty of years to make money but the time with yourself toddler you can’t get back.

Nothing7 · 05/12/2020 12:28

Plus an additional 2 hours added to your day so that pulls the hourly rate down...

Lei8133 · 05/12/2020 12:45

Take it, take it, take it!!! If you don’t, please send me the ad, I’d like to apply lol xx

HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee · 05/12/2020 13:04

There’s a contingent on mn who think women shouldn’t be working more than 15min from home or have a job that’s in any way arduous or demanding
All too much and disruptive apparently
No such employment advice is doled out to men.it’s ok for men to commute and have well paid jobs
Women, are told they need to follow their heart and it’s not all about money

Newmumatlast · 05/12/2020 13:06

Personally I would take it for a couple of years, save the additional money and then move on. When you move on you may find you'll more easily find a job over your current salary. 2 years is nothing. Money isn't everything but it really genuinely opens up doors and quality of life. I have a tower and would love to see her more but do a role involving alot of work for the oay (and to be fair the passion) for myself but also for her as the money I make doing it really is helping to build her a better future

Newmumatlast · 05/12/2020 13:07

I have a toddler. Not a tower

Fressia123 · 05/12/2020 13:20

I do think some jobs are worth missing out on family life. My previous job was that type of role and I don't regret it. It was amazing. I loved travelling for work, having my business cards, corporate AMEX, etc...

This job offer doesn't offer any of that (I loved that bit!) So I do t think it would be my first choice. I like being an Ops Manager but I think I'd want the flexibility to work from home every now and then, commute to a city (not a site) and being able to to see both horizontal and vertical progression. The job offer doesn't seem to offer all of that. It's much more "factory based" and I'm a proper corporate / office type of gal. My new role within my current company has shown me this.

I love to manage people that's without a question, but I also like to work side by side with other departments / corporations.

I think I have a lot of more clarity of mind than when I first applied (March).

OP posts:
HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee · 05/12/2020 13:26

You’ve quite clearly talked yourself out of the Amazon job. Let the recruiter know
And continue in your current workplace.
Your current employer now has a lot of leverage, they know you won’t move for another job. And your current employer can continue kind of as they are with the in a year thing being promised.

Fressia123 · 05/12/2020 13:37

I would still leave my current job BTW but it would have to be for the right type of role. I don't think what's been offered to me is worth changing jobs.

OP posts:
HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee · 05/12/2020 13:40

Let the recruiter know so they can get another candidate

Redcrayons · 05/12/2020 13:51

If you’re not going to take this one, it’s worth carrying on looking around.

Your company now know that you won’t be tempted away for big money.

Fressia123 · 05/12/2020 13:58

Yes big money isn't key it's higher salary + satisfaction

OP posts:
Grenlei · 05/12/2020 13:58

If due to my current low salary I couldn't afford to house all children of my family inside the home then I would take a significantly better paying job in a heartbeat Hmm

However I get the feeling the OP may be all about the drama...wasn't she also studying to be a psychologist at one point?!

YankeeDad · 05/12/2020 14:12

@Fressia123, I suppose I may be naive but I think you are handling this in exactly the right way.

I believe, based on what you have written, that there is an excellent chance that you are at the beginning of a wonderful stage of real progression in your career with your current company. I disagree with the posters who continue to say you are making a mistake by not jumping to this job that you don’t really want.

That other employer has already been deceptive by telling you only towards the end of the process that it’s a nighttime job. Who knows what other surprises they might spring, should you leave your job and move over there? Maybe they expect you on call 24/7 to answer emails or even to go in to the site at a moment’s notice. Maybe the job content will be unachievable without working unlimited “flexible” hours. They could require you to cancel any holiday at any time, with no notice, at your own expense. There may be legal limits on what they can literally demand, but companies can get around that by setting “performance expectations” that cannot otherwise be met, unless you voluntarily do all of these things for them.

Meanwhile, your current employer now knows that your CV and interview profile were so good that you got offered a whole lot more money somewhere else doing a completely different job. They also know that you a genuine commitment to the industry and company, making it more potentially worthwhile for them to invest in you. They know that at least one headhunter has identified you as a promising candidate for daytime roles for which they may be recruiting, and that you have the capability and ambition to take on more responsibility and thus justify a higher salary than what you are getting now. Contrary to a recent previous poster, I just don’t see how all of that that gives your employer more leverage to keep you in your place and to stop your progression!

Of course there is a risk that they will be unwilling or unable to keep their promises, but if that happens, then you will still be free to leave them for another job as and when they fail to follow through on anything that have promised. Whereas if you stay, you have a written list of promises that makes it much harder for them to feign innocence. They are raising your salary effective very soon, and it sounds as though they are making real investments into your career right now, by having you shadow people in other roles, in order to help you get ready for a new role with your current firm. Of course you need to watch closely whether they follow through, but this really does not sound like the set of actions one would expect from a CEO would take who is planning to let you down at the last moment. Instead, what you are hearing and seeing sounds very promising, and will become more so assuming it stays on track.

Best of luck, congratulations, and well done for having earned this opportunity with your existing firm!

BIWI · 05/12/2020 14:13

@Fressia123

My company / industry has exploded this year
In which case they should be able to pay you a better salary NOW rather than making you wait so long! It's not your problem if you think he's worried about rocking the boat. You are not being paid what you are worth.
Fressia123 · 05/12/2020 14:20

@Grenlei yes I actually got accepted at Exeter. However, it's a VERY long process and so competitive that I doubt if be successful given my background. It's still something I'd like to explore but maybe much more long term and within the counselling psychology path rather than clinical

I got to a point where I saw myself completely stuck and thought I had to create the opportunities myself. I don't feel that way anymore.

OP posts:
Ironingontheceiling · 05/12/2020 14:22

If you got accepted at a uni, then you’d be on the course. There’s no long process about it.

HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee · 05/12/2020 14:37

The leverage the current employer has is knowing op won’t move jobs. That creates power imbalance that they can and will utilise
Op Has sentimental notions about right job, not just money,dream job and staying Put. There is a vague undertaking of a review in year (is it written down?)