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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To turn down a 3x salary job?

409 replies

Fressia123 · 03/12/2020 11:33

I'm really really torn. Earlier in the year I got offered a job that pays £60k. I couldn't take it as it required relocation. They just got back to me to say they're happy to offer same role, different location but within commuting distance (1 hour drive). My current job pays £21k. I love what I'm building with it but I seriously doubt it will ever get beyond £30k. So it's between loving my company/job and the £££s. I'm absolutely torn.

OP posts:
Miip · 04/12/2020 18:56

I'm glad you're happy with the potential at your current job. I wouldn't work nights for 10x my salary.

chaosmaker · 04/12/2020 18:56

@Fressia123

Yes it's the Amazon one!
Yuk, not sure what you do now but that company couldn't pay me any money to work for them. They are horrendous and the sooner they go pop the better.
LesleyA · 04/12/2020 18:58

I didn’t get from your op that you were just comfortable in you current job. I got that you are happy in your job and your lifestyle will of course improve but that necessarily happier. I’m not suggesting that one should just be small and play safe but you have now what millions of people want and what can’t be bought at a shop, and what doesn’t feel better if you’re leaning in a marble table top. If you are worth being offered that salary I think you’ll be valuable in the future to another company. Own what you love, don’t put a price on the days of your life. Good luck and please update us on your decision

Callingallskeletons · 04/12/2020 19:02

Sorry OP I somehow missed the bit about it being nights and you having young children
I take it back I was wrong I would stay put if you are happy

Brilliant news about chat with your manager!

Original poster
Fressia123 · 04/12/2020 19:16

@sabbii they head hunted me. The originally told me it was somewhere 15 mins from home. When I got the first offer it turned out I would have to relocate. So they kept me in their books and now have offered me something closer but not that 15min commute. Through the hiring/interview process they never mentioned it was nights, it's only at offer stage that they do.

OP posts:
dderrick · 04/12/2020 19:17

If you're worth £60k, then your current job is taking you for a mug. Take the money & burn the bridge.

Nearly47 · 04/12/2020 19:21

Maybe you are a bit scared of the change? I'd take if really just one hour commute. I once had a job offer that on off peak hours took 1 hour but at peak hours was closer to 1.5 hours peak hour. And for me 3 hours total commute it's too much so turned down. But it wasn't nowhere near 3× times my salary. It is a massive increase.

supersplodge · 04/12/2020 19:40

I left my comfortable job in my local town for a small promotion to head office 35 miles away. I really left because I could see the writing on the wall for where I was - but the prospects at head office were much better.
I got a small pay rise but after tax it didn't even cover the train fare, and I had to get up at 6 instead of 8, and got home each day at 6pm or 6.30 instead of 5.10.

It was the best thing I ever did! The opportunities and encouragement at the new office were massive, I took professional qualifications, got several promotions, experienced a whole new city, and had access to flexible working. I changed jobs several times and travelled the country, met loads of great people and got lots of lovely big bonuses. I also got treated like a grown up!

Different situation from yours - but sometimes things are meant to be! Go for it!

Original poster
Fressia123 · 04/12/2020 19:43

In the end is working nights and the effect it will would have on family life. (I think that's the main thing) if it were a normal 9-5 I wouldn't think it twice.

OP posts:
supersplodge · 04/12/2020 19:45

Sorry - just saw your update. Ignore me......

Good luck with the job, enjoyment is also definitely key!

Topseyt · 04/12/2020 19:46

[quote Fressia123]@sabbii they head hunted me. The originally told me it was somewhere 15 mins from home. When I got the first offer it turned out I would have to relocate. So they kept me in their books and now have offered me something closer but not that 15min commute. Through the hiring/interview process they never mentioned it was nights, it's only at offer stage that they do.[/quote]
Very telling that they only mentioned it was night work at offer stage.

I would feel slightly hoodwinked by that and it would put me off big time.

CourtAndSpark2 · 04/12/2020 19:47

My DB worked in Amazon on the development and business process side of things. It is a very demanding company (always available!), there can be a lot of confrontation, strong personalities. But he always said he learned a huge amount there, that helped him his is career later. He was well paid too.

youvegottenminuteslynn · 04/12/2020 19:47

What kind of timescales are your current place talking about for payrise and promotion now they've made you an offer?

MadameMiggeldy · 04/12/2020 19:50

If you turn down a job paying three times what they pay you for a company like Amazon, they will never pay you properly because they know they have your loyalty and that you are willing to undervalue yourself to remain in your current industry.

This.
Also if your DP is problematic as alluded to you’d be wise to establish a nest egg of your own

Original poster
Fressia123 · 04/12/2020 19:51

It's within a year. I'm shadowing all the other heads for the next 12 months.

OP posts:
Yorkshiretolondon · 04/12/2020 19:52

What decision? Crikey TAKE IT! See it as a new challenge!

ChristmasFluff · 04/12/2020 19:56

I feel differently to lots of people on this thread. I am one of those peiple who goes along with 'do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life'.

You love your current job. Without this offer, you would have been happy.

You will be having a 2 hour commute and will be working for a company you obviously have reservations about - otherwise a 3x salary would have you biting their arm off.

I'd stay put. Who knows - maybe they'll come back with a genuine 15 minutes away offer? I still wouldn't do it - they are fibbers who would say '15 minutes' when they mean 'relocate'.

I could get a job at twice my salary and much less than my current 4 hour commute (if I commuted daily - I don't). I stay in this job because I love it. A job you love is very valuable - unless you are penniless

youvegottenminuteslynn · 04/12/2020 20:04

@Fressia123

It's within a year. I'm shadowing all the other heads for the next 12 months.
That's a long time considering you're already clearly well qualified. And no payrise in the meantime?! And why do you need to shadow all the other heads rather than increasing your profile and experience within your particular role / department? I'm really concerned they are throwing you crumbs and presenting them as a feast. They should be giving you a decent payrise now to show their appreciation of you being currently underpaid, even for where you are based, and to show they are serious.
Justbrutallyhonest · 04/12/2020 20:07

Quality of life is the key, those looking at just the salary increase are idiots, what do you know about the £60k role, can you do it, what pressure, yes it’s 2 hours commute on top but your not going to get an extra £40k working the same hours as you do now, speaking from experience such an uplift usually means you are working from earlier until later than before, taking more work home and on the end of the phone all the time. If this is what you are prepared for then that’s fine but it would be naive to think the only thing to change is money

Original poster
Fressia123 · 04/12/2020 20:18

The shadowing comes from being from a completely different industry and because I'll have to oversee three departments (or people who work within those departments). I kind of get it. I also get that as much as he knows I'm worth a lot he doesn't want to rock the boat as in the grand scheme of things I'm a new comer.

OP posts:
Carpedimum · 04/12/2020 20:19

Been there, done that - no amount of coin in the bank, flash car, fancy 2 week hol, shopping for designer fashion etc. can ever equate to time with children & significant others. Yes have a career, choose the field you love because it’s less like ‘work’ & treasure the things money just can’t buy. It will all fall into place, & more likely if you’ve got DP on board rather than working nights & passing like ships. The quality grass is sometimes right under your feet.

Nigglenaggle · 04/12/2020 20:21

It's your life so YANBU. But I don't think anyone in your current job would be hurt that you'd moved in the circumstances. It's not like it's just a little more is it?

If the hours were still ok I'd do it.

HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee · 04/12/2020 20:27

Your current work don’t completely value you,they’re chasing competitors offer away
Your boss should be rocking the boat (as you put it) for you

youvegottenminuteslynn · 04/12/2020 20:28

@Fressia123

The shadowing comes from being from a completely different industry and because I'll have to oversee three departments (or people who work within those departments). I kind of get it. I also get that as much as he knows I'm worth a lot he doesn't want to rock the boat as in the grand scheme of things I'm a new comer.
I don't see why he hasn't offered you a decent payrise in the meantime. It sounds like you'll be doing more walk for twelve months with the promise of a promotion at the end. You should be pushing for a salary in the interim that shows they are taking your career development seriously and view you as a long term employee. At the moment nothing has changed except now you know they plan to promote you in a year, which you thought would likely be the case anyway. Don't underestimate your power in this situation - you're obviously a coveted worker, it's madness they haven't offered a raise now to show they value you. A promise of a promotion is just that. And if the company folds or new management come in etc, the promotion could be withdrawn.
HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee · 04/12/2020 20:33

Current employer offering maybes and shadowing over a year
New employer offered 3x salary increase
Your current employer know you do not want to leave and are using that as leverage